When you are truly yourself and fully committed to yourself, you start to do things naturally. You will push and pull naturally because you are not going to agree with everyone and what they have to say. You are going to have boundaries. You are going to naturally escalate because you DO NOT give a fuck what others think. You don't care about what will happen. You only care about what's in front of your plate right now and amuse the fuck out of yourself. At any moment in the conversation, if you don't like them you'll get up and leave, because if they don't get you your better off without them. And through this all, you won't mind anything at all because you are invested in yourself more than the girl. You are more interested in whats going on in your life then whether you get the girl or not. So go love yourself for being you. You are fucking awesome as you are;)