~ archived since 2018 ~
Popular
Other
[deleted]
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
She is clearly interested in you but honestly, you could do everything "right" and still she will pick someone else. Her behavior is seems very attention seeking - all people, esp women get high off of it.
You need to imitate her behavior - and more so stop trying to win her over. Women really have to choose you. The more you do to keep her the more that will push her away... and btw, you don't send flowers to a woman on Valentine's after they tell you you are friends. Would you reward a dog for shitting on your carpet with a tasty treat?
Unfortunately, you never know what someone is doing, I don't want to say she is "cheating".... but a girl who behaves like this either a) has other men as "friends" or more or b) was abused. If she was assaulted, that is a normal guarding behavior.
Regardless, no matter who I'm dating, I'm always talking to other women. I've been ghosted or left for another man too many times for no "reason."
[–]Iplaynakey 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I appreciate the advice. The mimicking I need a bit more guidance on, as I'm not so clear on what you mean.
She never stated we were friends, she knows what we are, she wants to continue because I told her to end it that day. The flowers were before we had this conversation, it's after she got them that I asked her to lunch.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Stop chasing.
You're acting like you are committed or want commitment, when she has told you she is not ready. You need to take away your attention somewhat and stop pushing for that. Remain more casual. I have noticed with women, sex most of the time "just happens." There is no plan like us guys try to make in our heads. The more you try to push it, the less you get anywhere. That only works in very rare circumstances.
You're doing a good job of keeping some distance, when I say mimic, I mean... she is treating you as a casual, so that's what you need to treat her as. You can be sexual, without overstepping the boundary or being in a "relationship," as you already have!
[–]TheXXL 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It's funny how you wrote three times in this one post, that you were calling her out for whatever reason, and then you wonder why she doesn't want a relationship with you. It seems you are not only jealous, playing games, but also totally deaf to what she says. She mentioned her ex, and how she doesn't want to feel like that again. Have you ever asked her what that means? I am sure she has a story to tell.
Also, from what I read you both are not committed, so it's none of your business if she's with her ex, not even if she fucks him every day...
My advice: let it go. You both have completely different goals here. If you do not want to let go and learn the hard way, relax. Stop claiming her while she even tells you clearly that she doesn't want a relationship. Stop calling her out, it's pushing her away even more. Listen to what she actually says and try to understand! Get your jealousy in order, you have no right to call her out on anything regarding to other men. As it looks like very obviously, she doesn't trust you, and your behavior will make it worse.
[–]Lambdal7 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
she does not want to feel the same way again the way her ex made her feel. (fear of commitment?)
Nothing matters except what she means by that. Find that out and then you can make a post again here.
© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.created by /u/dream-hunter
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]Iplaynakey 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheXXL 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Lambdal7 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link