How well does going to clubs with a "I just wanna have fun" mindset work in terms of picking up girls?

2018-11-05T17:16:01+00:00

The nights where I've gone clubbing with a group of friends and genuinely been able to just say "fuck everything else, my only goal is to enjoy myself with my friends tonight" have always been the nights where I actually got a girl. The nights where I went and said "I hope I get a girl tonight" were the ones I was never successful.

You have to find a way to channel the former mindset EVERY time you go out. The trick is to just not care or have any expectations of the outcome of the night, just live it in the moment and adapt to the situation as it goes, anything can happen just as easily as nothing can happen, you never have any idea what the night has in store.

dailymanup · 2018-11-05T22:16:33+00:00

That's the exact attitude to have. When you go out "to pick up girls" you put a lot of pressure on yourself to perform. You're telling yourself that you care about the outcome. When you go out just to have fun, the pressure is off. Which makes you more relaxed, happy and fun, which in turn results in it actually being more likely you will meet girls. Try it. Just go out and have a great time and really don't try to find a girl. But if one dances up right next to you or makes it obvious, go for it.

As far as not caring, most people recommend the "how not to give a fuck" type of mentality. You can check out this article if you're interested.

polojonatan · 2018-11-05T22:55:24+00:00

realize fear is in your mind and the girls are there to have fun and connect with someone just as much as you

mschran1 · 2018-11-06T00:53:18+00:00

I would never go for it but I do think transparency is always important! If that’s truly where you’re at, the right girl for you will be down for a good time. But it’s important to be honest so they don’t assume you’re looking for something more. Getting everybody on the same page allows them to properly consent knowing it’s just going to be a hook up situation

2018-11-06T05:17:12+00:00

You should pretty much have the same mindset going to clubs and parties as going to the gym.

If you're just going to have fun and are oblivious to girls sure you're might get laid but you're not going to be self improving like you would have if you went there with goals in mind (flexing your social skills).

poopfeast180 · 2018-11-06T06:32:09+00:00

Imagine if you had cancer knew you would die in 2 weeks.

Would you care about being a depressed idiot afraid of doing daring uncomfortable shit for fun or live those two weeks to your max?

So why really as a fully healthy and capable individual are you wasting time when millions of people arent as fortunate as you

NewlsBetter · 2018-11-06T07:41:33+00:00

It's a good headspace to be in, but in my experience it's usually not enough on its own. It's too passive, too direction-less. You need to be more proactive and goal oriented in your interactions, so that you will be having fun but also setting yourself up to pull.

Joan_Zeroz · 2018-11-06T11:13:26+00:00

It may help but if you want to increase your chances you must concentrate into really hit on girls, otherwise you will end up drunk or just fooling around.

Zeroz

KingScooby666 · 2018-11-05T16:59:06+00:00

It’s okay, you’ll get more comfortable as time goes on. The hardest part is breaking the ice and making the first move. Some girls are mean but I guarantee majority of the time you can get a number

Marts10 · 2018-11-05T20:12:41+00:00

Yeah its true go with a “see what happens” mindset rather than a “ I hope I makeout with someone” My best parties and clubs and making out sessions where the ones I just went with the flow and the worst ones were the ones were I wanted to make out with girls

Title	How well does going to clubs with a "I just wanna have fun" mindset work in terms of picking up girls?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	7
Comments	10
Date	November 5, 2018 4:56 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/9uf7yh/how_well_does_going_to_clubs_with_a_i_just_wanna/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-well-does-going-to-clubs-with-a-i-just-wanna.1456168 https://theredarchive.com/post/1456168

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