Hi, I have been following this subreddit for some time. Really inspiring posts. About me, (M, 25) I am from India, growing up I had a stammer, that kind of prevented me to go out and socializing with other people. I belong to a lower middle-class family. I managed to get into IIT Kharagpur, alma mater of Sundar Pichai. I have a great job as a software engineer, which pays me really well. I attended the McGuire programme, and got a control over my stammer and on my journey to become an articulate and eloquent speaker.

Now my problem is, I put girls who are attractive, charismatic, or who are sophisticated, belonging to the rich family on a pedestal and can't seem to attract them. I lose frame when I approach them, can't be myself, just want to end that conversation or fuck up my grammar. Recently I started cold approaching women and joined a boot camp too.

I eat healthily, work out, did a lot of adventure activities and have a cool lifestyle. I use online dating, have been on some dates but I am not that attracted to any one of them. These were not the kind of girls I would pursue or put on pedestals, they belong to the lower middle class too like me, not that charismatic.

How can I work on my charisma and not lose my cool, when I see a girl I am attracted to. I know we attract people, who are like us, but I want to attract 8-9s by being 8-9 myself. How can I recondition myself, to believe I deserve this kind of girls, working on myself at the same time.