Video Link: https://youtu.be/XDFL3_81m2M

You can’t barter for attention, affection, attraction, or love.

One of the biggest mistakes people make when trying to establish a relationship with another person is that they think that they can barter for attention, affection, love or approval.

One of the main factors why bartering is not a good approach when trying to establish new relationships is that it can instill a feeling of indebtedness on the other person. No one wants to feel indebted, especially to someone that they don’t know.

Buying stuff for a person is an obvious form of bartering. Less obvious is non-material things, like doing a person favors, being a shoulder to cry on, or just giving them compliments.

Now if a person is your friend and you are actually altruistically doing favors for them purely out of kindness and you don’t want anything in return, then that’s fine. But deep down if you are really doing it to try to make them like you, or to get their attention or affection, then perhaps you are not really the nice guy that you think you are.