A pattern that I've noticed in literally all of my relationships is the following:

Steps:

  1. Meet girl - some initial excitement
  2. Get number - text and chat about things
  3. Meet up for date / dates - generally goes well
  4. Either of the following:
    1. Things are moving in a positive direction and then she becomes "busy" or less available for contact. As I've read, I don't push anything. BUT eventually she just leaves and I meet up with her again in the future and we catch up and then move on.
    2. She expresses strong interest. I'm concerned I might not be making a good decision / I wouldn't be good for her. I break off contact and she loses interest.
  5. I beat myself over having missed the opportunity to have formed a deeper connection. I imagine her having moved on (or witnessed) in some other seemingly better direction without me (sometimes even with someone else).

I feel like I'm either trying to avoid being happy or driving someone into just being another acquaintance. It's particularly devastating because I'll have these experiences and it will be months between when they happen to when I meet someone new.

It's so painful because I feel like everything I've described in steps 1-5 occurs at such a surface level, except when they get really interested and I end up driving them away.

Questions:

This has literally happened to me in my past 20 experiences. Can anyone relate?

How can the cycle (steps 4-5) be broken ???