It's not that women prefer jerks, it's that they desire the underlying complementary characteristics that often go with being a jerk.

TANKER_06 · 2020-10-29T19:54:57+00:00

Hey! Here are some tips on improving your videos. Please don't take this as an attack on your skill or knowledge on the subject, I just want to offer advice on your videos.

You started on a journey many want to but can't be bothered with, keep it up, and keep improving!

Lower your camera.
It looks like you're looking up, this is bad because it highlights your receding hairline and your double-chin. In addition, it changes the dynamic of the video; you're looking up to us, which passes you off as less credible, and it forces you to sit up rigidly. Your chin should be perpendicular to your neck and camera at eye level.

Setting the scene.
Have the top of the frame just clear your hair, with the rest on your body. If you can't do that, try moving your chair back. For this video, it should cut off at the top of the 2 wall-mounted lamps.

You might want to do a few things to make it look more presentable. That table and chair with what I assume is a lamp behind you? Move it out of the shot.

Get a dimmable LED light and have it light up your background. Stick to one temperature for lighting (warm or cool) and not have both.

Get a ring light for your face, so it's lit up well. Your face is hit from cool light from the window, and warm light from your room lights, and has a shadow cutting diagonally across the right of your face (or left from your perspective).

You don't need to spend much on these lights, you can get cheap ones and they'd do the job just fine, perhaps with a bit more fiddling.

Slow your speed.
You're reading off a script and it shows. You're running through the words too fast, which makes you seem nervous, and it also makes it hard for people to process what you're saying. Ideally, you want to be more candid, and instead of having full scripts, just have 1-liners to remind you of the key points.

This also results in sharp intakes of breaths, which after a while leaves your audience breathless!

Tonal Inflections
You need to pay attention to your tonal inflections, and remember to put some in. Your introduction, "Hey guys... Michael here." is probably not something you want to say the way you said it to a woman, so don't do it to someone you're trying to give advice to.

For the rest of the video, it's just monotonous, and with the fast reading speed, it makes it hard for anyone to follow what you're saying.

You don't need to be wildly animated like Tyler from RSD, but you need to find the sweet spot of being you and being entertaining enough to capture attention.

Relax your posture.
Imagine you're at home, just sitting in front of your computer browsing Reddit. That's about how you want to sit. This helps put you in a relaxed state, which goes a long way.

Involve your audience.
While it's always going to be a monologue unless it's live, you can involve your audience by asking them questions that get them thinking, and getting them to imagine a scenario, as I did earlier. Together with a slower cadence, this helps people better understand your points. Don't do it all the time of course.

More cuts
Don't worry about screwing up. Anytime you stutter, cut it out. With a more natural talking speed, that makes it easier to cut out without being too obvious.

afuntimewashadbyall · 2020-10-29T14:08:23+00:00

Im a "jerk". You have to have good techincal game if youre naturally a jerk.

You can be horrible at pua and a jerk.

Most acquired it early on through trail and error. Most of my friends are jerk and shoot the shit discuss tactics of pick up without calling in that. Essentially they worked on game without knowing it.

TheDevilPutD · 2020-10-29T15:33:37+00:00

Jerk is a term virgins came up with because they were too jealous other guys were actually getting laid.

TANKER_06 · 2020-10-29T21:15:10+00:00

All those traits, arrogance, obnoxiousness, indifference/self-centeredness are a spectrum.
Humility - Arrogance
Polite - Obnoxious
Timid - Confident
Empathy - Apathy

Leaning too far on the "bad" end doesn't automatically make you a jerk. A good example would be Robert Downy Jr, who, without context, can seem arrogant, obnoxious, confident and apathetic.

That doesn't make him a jerk.

To me, a jerk/asshole/douche is someone who is socially negative and/or destructive, either immediately or in the longterm. They *may* have some of the traits above, but if anything, those traits serve to hide their true personality. And if they have all the above traits and use them well, you're probably dealing with a psycho/sociopath.

The thing is, most people are a mix. One could be obnoxiously arrogant, yet timid and or apathetic.

And there is where I think the key lies. To be socially aware, and be able to move up or down the spectrum reasonably and naturally. Or to use your term, to be congruent with both yourself and the conversation.

This is not meant to dilute your main underlying message of "Women are attracted to confident and honest men who have goals and are not needy, and that's something you can't fake or use a technique or canned material for."

I just wanted to ensure that no one glosses over the nuances there, or get caught up and get confused.

So how did you, or are you, going to cultivate those traits? You've identified the problem, so what's the solution? Maybe that can be your next video!

Title	It's not that women prefer jerks, it's that they desire the underlying complementary characteristics that often go with being a jerk.
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	29
Comments	4
Date	October 29, 2020 2:01 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/jkak92/its_not_that_women_prefer_jerks_its_that_they/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/its-not-that-women-prefer-jerks-its-that-they.1504787 https://theredarchive.com/post/1504787

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