I’ve been at this for several years now and my conversational and seduction skills have improved greatly. Recently, I’ve been going out a few guys and I noticed that they really aren’t that good at conversations. I’m by no means the best but ‘in a world of incompetence being competent makes you extraordinary’.

Ill try and explain where I notice people go wrong and how to fix or improve it.

1) Get your emotions in check: conversations are not just about what you say but also your tone and body language, they are basically windows into your mind. A nervous person won’t just be nervous in their head but also show it in how they talk, and how they hold themselves. It’s as easy to see as the sunrise. What you need to do is calm down, relax and just have a good time. That calming energy will transfer out to those who you are talking to and those who see you as well. This isn’t a magic fix all but if you are at ease others will be as well.

2) Speak less and listen more: I see a lot of people talking too much and they are just digging themselves into a hole of awkwardness. Just breathe and be ok with letting the girl talk. I am not saying to never talk, that will turn into an interview; crack a few jokes to get her laughing then ask her a good question to put the ball back in her court. The more you talk the more chance you will blunder, which gets in your head and messes with your confidence. Tighten it up and don’t talk yourself out of sex.

3) Learn to read people: you don’t need to be an expert and know exactly what they are thinking, but determining if they are engaged in the conversation or not is absolutely necessary. You need to know when you need to recalibrate your approach or when to bail entirely. People who are bad at this will ramble on or keep asking questions about a topic they clearly don’t want to talk about and will keep them as a conversational hostage. I think people do this when they are talking about something they care about but it’s technical and not emotional. If you recognize their discomfort you can pivot and adjust for success. Watch their eyes, their facial expressions, where their body is facing, what their arms and hands are doing.

These are some simple things that anyone can implement immediately, but still take some skill at developing a style and an understanding to really make the most out of them.

If you don’t understand anything ask and I’ll try and explain it better or in context.

Good luck homies.