Many of you have to live with a disrespectful or humilating STBXW. Or you have to see/interact during custody transfers and she really tries to unsettle you or make drama.

I have a tactic I used at one job that worked great. Came across it by accident.

I had a shirt that said "Blank 'em if they can't take joke", the one with the guy smoking a pipe, a very old internet meme. So, at this job I had to get dressed and deal with some real butthead clients. Now, I'm really good with irate people, patient listener, but out of 100s there's always a few that can will get to anybody.

One day, after working extra days for the holidays, I had no white undershirts unwashed, having no days off to do the laundry. So underneath my dress shirt I wore the "If they can't take a joke" shirt.

This was a retail job in lower management so I'd be doing physical stuff in the back of the store and such so I liked to always have a 'sweat soaker' cotton shirt under my nice button-up; and wear just that after close and I still needed to stock stuff or work in the hot back area that wasn't A/C.

Long story short (too late!), a customer came in, one that pushed buttons because they delighted in harassing people and had a lifetime of experience in IRL Trolling and busting chops.

I realized I had my shirt on, and when they launched into a tirade I started fingering over the written words. As they went on complaining, it was a great feeling to constantly feel I was saying "Blank 'em, if they can't take a joke"

A wave of peace and smirking contentment came over my mentality, and made it a snap to deal with it.

I then moved on to add more shirts with simple messages like the Old Hallmark Lady saying "Screw you, A!" and "You're a Major League A" with that old fashioned baseball style lettering.

It was great. My boss howled with laughter and told my regional manager who slapped me on the back and laughed his tail off for 5 minutes when they found out and warned me never to wear my t-shirt only when the store was open, though.

So, in addition to airpods/headphones as many suggested, if you have to cohabit with a real piece-of-work STBXW, try buying a funny shirt and wearing it under another. Or, just wear it out and bold. Whenever she gets on your nerves, you can put your hands over the lettering and enjoy.

Right now I have the "Don't hit me with them Negative Waves" shirt in my inventory to deploy when needed.