My wife and I have had quite the life struggles over the past 6 years of marriage. We struggled with infertility and struggled to adopt (spending a LOT of money and going far into debt along the way). She had an affair in 2022 and ironically got pregnant. She told me right away and wanted things to continue with only me and said she was in a very dark place and felt like she couldn't safely talk to me and sought out someone else but regretted it right away and it only happened once.

I love my daughter so much and want to be a part of her life and support her.

This summer the wife and I have finally (after 2 years of suggesting and pushing it) gone to marriage counseling which seemed to be working. She has overall stopped being a nice person. She spread herself so thin trying to take care of the extended family that lives in our house (her son, niece, nephew, sister and father in law...in addition to me, wife and baby) while also started a business in 2022, 1 month after giving birth.

The overarching strategy I have tried to work with her on is to just be a nicer person. She has the tendency to snap and I have a tendency to get defensive and feel attacked when said snap occurs. If we can both be nicer and take care of each other there would have been less friction.

Last weekend there was an argument for the last time, I snapped and said things I shouldn't have said because I was tired of being treated the way I was. I told her I'm f'in done with her and her BS and I'm gone. I moved in w my brother the next day and will be staying there for the time being.

We still love each other but know it just wasn't going to work out long term and wanted to end things amicably. We tried to make things work but we just don't get along anymore and decided this is the best for both our sanity moving forward. She's been divorced before, and has never used a lawyer and things ended amicably w her ex.

I am happy I found this support thread and wanted to share my story w someone else. I have never told anyone outside of therapists about the baby situation...