So, a lot of people ask me, "Hey, I slept with a girl - how do I make her stay? How do I keep her around for day two, day three, day four... maybe even a long-term relationship?"

Now, I’ve had a seven-year-long relationship, and multiple "mini-relationships". Let me tell you what’s worked for me to keep women interested and make them want to stay.

Bear in mind these are the things you need if you want to get in a relationship with a physically attractive girl who is confident, smart and funny. If you want a relationship with just any girl, you don't need all of this.

1. Abundance

First off, abundance. This is huge. She needs to feel like you actually chose her, not that she’s the only girl you could get.

If a girl senses that you’re afraid to lose her - if you’re clinging to her like she’s your last lifeline - it’s over. Women can feel that. And the moment they feel it, they lose attraction.

Now don’t fake it. I know some guys try to act like they have options when they don’t, but trust me, it comes across as inauthentic, and that’s worse.

And abundance isn’t just about sleeping with a ton of women just to prove a point. It’s about having the vibe that says, “I could meet other women if I wanted to, but I chose you.” And that’s what makes her feel lucky to be with you. It’s not something you can fake; it’s a behaviour you develop after becoming experienced in dating.

If you're wondering how to get abundance, that's what most of my other Reddit posts are all about.

2. Be an Interesting Person

Next, you’ve got to be interesting. Think about it - why would anyone want to spend time with someone boring?

In a short-term, friends-with-benefits kind of thing, you might be able to get by on sexual chemistry alone. But for anything longer, it’s not enough.

A relationship is basically doing things together plus occasionally having sex. So if the “doing things together” part is boring - if the conversations aren’t engaging - why would she stick around?

Now, what makes someone interesting? For me, it’s critical thinking. I think people who just parrot what everyone else says, without forming their own opinions, are boring. They don’t have substance.

In my experience, women find it interesting when you make them think differently. I’ve heard it so many times: “You made me see things in a new way.” That’s powerful. If spending time with you makes her question her beliefs or learn something new, she’ll want more of that.

We’re all selfish beings at the end of the day. If you enhance her life - not just with fun and emotions but by making her better in some way - she’ll see you as someone worth staying with.

Also, I've never offered money to any of the girls I have dated and we have always been splitting when dating, so it's a stereotype that you need to give money and status for them to stay with you.

If you want a "princess-type" of girl - yes. But I don't date those women, so it's not a problem I have run into.

3. Communication Skills

Now, let’s talk about communication. It’s as important in a relationship as it is in the initial dating phase. But it’s slightly different.

When you’re attracting a girl, it’s all about flirting, confidence, and charisma. But when you’re in a relationship, you need skills like:

  • Listening
  • Empathy
  • Conflict resolution
  • Managing expectations

Honestly, relationships are built on communication. If you don’t have these skills, things will eventually fall apart.

The good news? A lot of these skills carry over. The confidence and charisma you use to attract women can help you navigate relationships, but you’ll still need to practice.

And here’s the thing - if all you do is one-night stands, you’ll never develop these skills. You’ve got to actually be in relationships to learn how to handle the hard conversations that eventually come up.

4. Maintain Your Mojo

Finally: you’ve got to maintain your mojo.

One of the biggest killers of relationships is complacency. People get comfortable, and they stop putting in effort. When one person stops trying, the other follows, and before you know it, the spark is gone.

So how do you keep that energy alive? For some, it’s having an open relationship. I’ve tried that, and honestly, I’ve found it works really well - though I know it’s not for everyone. I’ll probably make another post about that because there’s a lot of misconceptions around open relationships.

But even if you’re in a monogamous relationship, you’ve got to find ways to keep things fresh. Maybe it’s focusing on self-improvement, staying social, or pursuing new challenges.

Think of it this way: when you commit to a relationship, you’re essentially agreeing to trade limits. You’re saying, “I’m not seeing other people - not because I can’t, but because I choose not to.” But that doesn’t mean you should let yourself go or stop trying.

It’s about maintaining that edge, that energy, that mojo that attracted her to you in the first place.