Stuck between bipolar mother and narcissistic wife

LateralThinker13 · 2025-04-15T18:03:54+00:00

I know I have my duty towards my wife and my mother, I will definitely perform my duties but I am trying to be emotionally detached from both of these persons,

As a second-gen Indian, I can appreciate the concept of family duty as you intend it. But as an American, I temper that concept with a reciprocal question: "What have they done in return for you doing your duty?" Because doing your duty is a labor, a task, and it also requires that they do THEIR duty to you as son and husband. If they do not, then the social contract between you two has been broken - by them - and you are free to leave.

And you should. Narcissists are incurable and bipolar isn't much better. In my experience it's just not worth the struggle. Just run.

Think_Travel5752 · 2025-04-15T19:35:04+00:00

Nobody believe me when I said that my mom is a narcissist, not even my own brother. I’m sick and tired of her not taking accountability of a mistake. I hope I will not get a wife like my mom in the future.

StockButterscotch764 · 2025-04-15T20:08:20+00:00

I would impose some order in the house by setting very specific limits w/ both of them & then establishing consequences if they violate any/all agreements….you shouldn’t have any expectations of just tolerating this situation if nothing changes….life is too damn short….Best of Luck.

RealStarkey · 2025-04-16T11:24:52+00:00

Before your duty to anyone else you owe your self sanity and dignity. You can’t help anyone if you can’t help yourself

Sitheral · 2025-04-16T20:32:11+00:00

I don't know much about idian culture and how viable it is to advice that but I would say fuck the duties and go your own way.

LavishnessSuch9438 · 2025-04-17T06:17:59+00:00

Shit, I don't envy you in the slightest and I'm saying that with respect. You could possibly take a page from their play-book, walk out and slam the door, walk back in tell them off, walk back out and slam the door, come back 5 hours later like nothing happened and tell them this is the first time you'd been home all day.

bigskycaniac · 2025-04-17T16:21:14+00:00

If you can, get into your own place immediately. Unhealthy situation, will not improve.

binsomniac · 2025-04-15T18:40:02+00:00

🤔... I'm sorry OP, about the situation that you find yourself at home. My only advice is to get therapy, with some luck, your therapist would "convince" you that in order to help others ( your mother condition and wife ) you don't "need" to end up, destroying your mental health, and there's the option to stop, hurting yourself on a daily basis...🤷‍♂️ Good luck.

Title	Stuck between bipolar mother and narcissistic wife
Author	LavishnessSuch9438
Upvotes	32
Comments	22
Date	April 15, 2025 5:24 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1jzxnm1/stuck_between_bipolar_mother_and_narcissistic_wife/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/stuck-between-bipolar-mother-and-narcissistic-wife.1549679 https://theredarchive.com/post/1549679

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