Hi ladies,
Hope this is allowed here. I started dating my husband when I was 20, we got married at 22, and we’ve been married now for 10 years. We’ve had some ups and downs but overall he’s been the perfect husband in almost every way (isn’t the greatest listener, but not a huge deal).
Just gonna repost what I wrote in another sub:
My husband (39m) has stopped engaging/hitting on me for the past 3ish months now. I just turned 32.
I gained 40 lbs since the start of our relationship with a lot of my weight going to places guys like, so I don’t think he was ever bothered and always told me I looked really good, and proved it by hitting me up for sex almost every day.
I’ve never felt so ugly as in the past 3 months. He hates his job right now and I’m currently not working (finishing school in 2 months), so idk if it’s just work stress or what. He seems depressed most days and feels stuck in his job. I’m very supportive and do all the chores, make him dinner when he asks, etc but idk maybe he’s resentful I’m not working right now.
If I bring it up he gets defensive and says it’s my fault, or he hasn’t been in the mood because of work stress, etc. Some of our worst fights too have been in the last 3 months because he seems checked out. Normally if I’m upset he’ll ask if I’m okay, if he can do anything for me, just checked in with me a lot and but now his usual response is “that sucks”. Like it feels like he hates me.
He doesn’t watch porn and never has, he works out every day and is in the best shape of his life, he just got checked at the dr and his health is good, so idk maybe he’s just depressed but I keep thinking he just thinks I’m ugly now or something.
I dumped 10 lbs in the past month because it’s depressing me so much. I keep telling myself that maybe if I get back down to 120 lbs, he’ll act like how he acted before. He’s been massively depressed before in our 12 year relationship and his way of me“helping” would be to have sex with him, now suddenly he’s too depressed. It’s just so weird to me.
Does it sound like things are headed down a bad path? Thoughts?
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