I’m a middle-aged dad in the UK currently on police bail following a domestic abuse allegation that I strongly deny. I have no previous record and have been fully cooperating since the start. The allegation arose during a very difficult period in my relationship, which included my partner experiencing a serious mental health crisis and being hospitalised.

Despite having no prior history, I was arrested, held in custody, and placed on bail with conditions that meant I had to leave the family home and have no contact with my partner for a significant period. I was also separated from my dog, who is a big part of my daily life and emotional support, and that loss has been harder than I expected.

My phone was seized and is still with forensics, which has affected my ability to work, as I rely on it for my job. Since then, I’ve been moving between hotels, friends’ homes, and a rented room, while still paying rent and household bills for the family home where my partner and children live. The financial strain has been substantial.

The hardest part has been the impact on my children. I wasn’t able to see my daughter for around three to four weeks, which was incredibly painful for both of us. Contact has gradually improved, and I’ve been able to spend time with my children again, but everything feels fragile and uncertain. My daughter is 14 and trying to process adult decisions she shouldn’t have to worry about. My son is at university and has been very supportive, but I hate that he’s under pressure as well.

What makes this especially difficult is the waiting. My bail has been extended, and I’m now in limbo until late February, when I’m due to return to the police for an update. There’s no clear timeline, no clarity, and no real way to move forward — just months of uncertainty while life is effectively on hold.

I’m sharing this because the process itself has been deeply destabilising, even before any conclusion has been reached. I’m doing my best to stay calm, keep working, support my kids, and rebuild some routine, but the waiting and isolation are tough.

If anyone has been through something similar or has advice on coping with the waiting, the emotional strain, or protecting family relationships during this kind of process, I’d be really grateful to hear your experience.