I moved to the US four years ago from a South Asian country on a dependent visa through my wife. Since my arrival, I’ve felt trapped in a difficult situation. Everything seemed to go wrong from the moment I stepped foot in the US. In the very first week, I had a fight with my wife because she was upset that she had to cook meals for both of us twice a day while also attending college. I wanted to help, but I was suffering from severe jet lag and wasn't recovering well. Additionally, she was living in a shared apartment with three other girls, so I wasn’t sure what items in the kitchen belonged to her and what I could use.

At that moment, I realized that things were not going to be easy for me. By the way, I married her after dating for six long years. After the first week, I took up some cash jobs in another location to contribute a little. Once she graduated, we moved to another place where I worked for a whole year. This job kept me busy, and I didn’t have to interact with her much. However, we moved again after a year, and I was working there as well. Unfortunately, due to political changes, I had to leave that job and decided to focus on my studies.

Now, we seem to fight every day. One day, she even told me that I was here because she brought me to the US, and that I wouldn’t be here otherwise. She seems to think that she’s doing me a favor. I chose to come here because I love her, and I don’t want to jeopardize her career by asking her to come back home after all she has achieved in the US.

Since I was working too, we managed to pay off our car, and now she is thinking about buying a home, which I can’t refuse. She also wants to have kids, which I really don’t want, but if I try to discuss it, it leads to another fight, and she walks away for hours without telling me where she’s going. To avoid constant conflict, I’ve stopped initiating conversations.

I’ve invested a lot in this relationship, and while I do want to stay in the US, I’m reconsidering being with her. All of this is making me feel weaker each day, affecting my ability to focus on my career, and I really don’t see a way out.