Vetting is tough 😩, what do you use to make it easier ? Any tips and tricks welcome

Jenneapolis · 2026-05-31T18:05:19+00:00

You don’t do all your vetting before agreeing for a date. You do enough, you have a low stakes date in person, and you vet while dating in person over a period of weeks/months. You will have dates in person that are a flop, that’s just part of it.

LightOverWater · 2026-05-31T17:35:44+00:00

I think I would start with a different question first. What are you looking for in a man? (vet for... what?)

Individual_Tailor767 · 2026-05-31T17:40:50+00:00

Well it depends on what you’re looking for, but I’d start with the basics

First safety, then career & education, then reputation.

After you check linkedin, socials, and google his name plus city or name plus public records and see what you can find

I work a lot now, so don’t have the time to really look every man up so I’m mostly going off of theteareport, which definitely helps, I’ve canceled some dates based on red flags I’ve found, also learning to work in the serious topics into the fun convo when on a date is important.

What are you looking for?

l_petrie · 2026-05-31T18:25:20+00:00

I like burned haystack dating method for learning to identify possible rhetorical patterns! Also I highly encourage getting feedback from safe men in your life, whether it’s friends or your brother or dad. Men can see through other men’s bs pretty fast.

AutoModerator · 2026-05-31T17:28:40+00:00

Title: Vetting is tough 😩, what do you use to make it easier ? Any tips and tricks welcome

Author useruseruser100

Full text: I spent hours searching online and talking to the men I date to try to get a sense of who they are but there’s so much information and I know some men tend to lie when they initially start dating so it makes it hard to properly vet the new men I am courting or decide who to give a chance.

What are you ladies using to make it easier ?

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Vast-Society4093 · 2026-05-31T18:58:08+00:00

My honest opinion. Good men are hard to find so I think it’s ok that it shouldn’t be easy.

But you can be intentional with your deal breakers , your values , political beliefs marriage prospects kids, long term goals, spending ,habits etc. ask the essentials and important questions early . It’s tedious and not so fun I know but it’s your future.

Look for nonverbal cues if you can’t trust them. I usually don’t take them seriously unless they actually showed that they act true to their words. How did they act if you have a small problem, do they help ? Offer advice ?

The book : why men love bitches , is my recommendation too.

Title	Vetting is tough 😩, what do you use to make it easier ? Any tips and tricks welcome
Author	useruseruser100
Upvotes	6
Comments	7
Date	May 31, 2026 5:28 PM UTC (1 month ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/1tt1lls/vetting_is_tough_what_do_you_use_to_make_it/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/vetting-is-tough-what-do-you-use-to-make-it-easier.1581750 https://theredarchive.com/post/1581750

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