7 month LTR denies sex, saying she doesn't feel like it, how do you guys react?

oggurt · 2016-08-14T23:35:09+00:00

Do you get upset? No. You can't negotiate attraction. That's a basic rule. You can try to apply dread, but if you're already working out or hanging out with friends without her, you may need to think about your relationship.

If she's not occasionally initiating sex and isn't receptive when you initiate, then she's not worthy of your LTR. You don't give commitment to girls who aren't giving you what you want in return. Find a girl who does. She doesn't get to sleep or cuddle if you don't get sex, not that I'm advocating telling her that's the deal. Ultimatums only work temporarily and she will resent you for it.

Your options are dread, lightly, or to break it off.

RedSkeller · 2016-08-14T21:10:23+00:00

Not really much to go on here. Do you lift? How much time do you spend together? Is the sex good? Has it been tapering off?

[deleted] · 2016-08-14T22:51:09+00:00

Mentally, move on. Start leaving without saying anything. She's not your keeper. Don't be upset. Be busy.

dr_warlock · 2016-08-15T00:07:25+00:00

If You Settle for a Deadbedroom or Duty Sex, You're a Loser

Specifically, what not to do section.

feminazis_stalk_me · 2016-08-15T02:18:10+00:00

Start being busy, start being gone and start leaving your phone locked, turned off or at home when you're away. When she gets curious about your behavior you ignore, deny, use plausible deniability or agree and amplify. Learn to play guitar while you're at it.

DeepRelay · 2016-08-14T22:03:13+00:00

Dread! Even worked as a Beta. Watch as she suddenly starts buying 'healthy alternatives' at the grocery store and goes to to the gym if she thinks you'll dump her and she doesn't have any prospects. If either is false she'll cheat on you or dump you. When I was in my late 20s an ex did this, and when I was pissed and stayed away from home she even gave up her gluten free BS because of it. (I should add, she cheated on me once she realized I never would have dumped her so always make sure that's an option)

Yashugan00 · 2016-08-14T23:17:28+00:00

Never get upset. Go along with it. Become busier and busier. Make it gradual and in proportion with her pushing you away. Make it plausible and Dont mention it. Of course nothing is wrong. Push pull. You're pushing, she'll try to pull you back in.

Not necessarily anything wrong in this relationship. You're maybe a little bit too available. Familiarity breeds contempt

SexySmexxy · 2016-08-15T03:27:24+00:00

"Ok, bye"

Go out somewhere for the night, anywhere. Even if it's just to sleep in your car or visit a friend or stay at your parents for the night.

Ignore her texts / calls until the next day, see her and act like nothing happened.

If her behaviour continues rinse and repeat.

Thats the dread way

OR

You could hold an adult conversation with her about sex and how you want it. If at the end of it you don't get your way go back to #1.

Dread game never works if you physically stay with her after she denies you sex, because then she knows you aren't getting it.

If she doesn't know where you are thats when the brain starts ticking.

[deleted] · 2016-08-15T04:15:06+00:00

Did she say why she didn't want to have sex? Is she having sex with someone else? That's weird. Is she going through some sort of hormonal change, or major event in her life?

ecosci · 2016-08-17T01:49:59+00:00

Get some more options man, she will feel the competetion which causes tingles remember if your woman isnt jumping your bones shes not attracted to you its not good for a man to ask or beg his lady for sex.She is getting pounded from someone else trust me this is the first sign im willing to bet she is still seeing a ex or somebody she knows check her out dont be her plan b backup.

RPShitlord · 2016-08-14T21:42:31+00:00

Not right there or then, but 7 months is too soon for denials and twice weekly sex.

As a test, tell her you want an open relationship. Because exclusivity isn't worth it with what she brings to the table right now.

Or give out only as much time and attention and affection as she deserves with her sexuality towards you.

Title	7 month LTR denies sex, saying she doesn't feel like it, how do you guys react?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	1
Comments	13
Date	August 14, 2016 9:07 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/4xq39z/7_month_ltr_denies_sex_saying_she_doesnt_feel/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/7-month-ltr-denies-sex-saying-she-doesnt-feel-like.184494 https://theredarchive.com/post/184494

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