Self-esteem in the toilet at the end of law school

SkorchZang · 2016-06-27T06:20:10+00:00

This is gonna take serious balls, but I reckon your best bet is to distance yourself from your 10/10 and her family for a time. Claim you're busy, no real explanations given. See her about 1 time a week, and only to have fun together, shut down any heavy talk/fam issues/whatever. Tell her it's "your time" and you want to spend it on her, not anyone else, be charming like that.

The most worrying thing about the situation (besides your health issues) is how your extremely hot GF thinks she gets to tell you when you "need to change", and that's normal operating procedure with her. And you seem to actually listen to her. She is going to fucking smash your heart to bits, bro. The more you stay obsessed with her and too close to her, the sooner that cliffhanger is going to happen. You don't want that bullshit crushing you just when you're going for your important examination, yet that's exactly what women will do if given the chance. That's why my suggestion is to establish distance from her, limit the time you spend together, and turn it into positive-emotions mode only. At other times be less available, familiarity breeds contempt.

Never unload any of your problems on her. Listen to hers and act like her Daddy. When she brings up your issues, gently brush them aside and say she shouldn't worry so much, she'll get a wrinkle. Tease her and act IN CONTROL instead of allowing her to see you thrashing about and confused. She is not your friend! This is your woman we're talking about man.

[deleted] · 2016-06-27T06:23:37+00:00

I want to hear about this anxiety.

We like to rationalize our ailments like ADHD or anxiety as just having some chemical imbalance. So we get a prescription to manage the damage.

Think of a physical wound, a laceration. You hit up the ER and they stop the bleeding, stitch you up and send you home with pain pills. Next week comes along and fuck, it happened again. So the doctor sews you up, slaps a bandage on it and sends you home with pain pills.

Repeat unto death. Replace pain pills with booze or pussy or Adderall or gaming...

Problem is, no one has considered to find the fucking asshole that keeps stabbing you or at least the knife. So for instance, I was left alone a lot as a kid. My mother comes from a long line of colorful paranoid schizos who think children can read their minds through the TV and the Turkish Army want them dead...but only with the help of certain CIA agents. That means she's incapable of loving anyone but herself.

This is the knife that has cause sever attachment issues that I currently have to deal with. So what happened to you?

ledbed · 2016-06-27T06:03:11+00:00

If a woman is telling you to to change it's a SHIT test. If you change she will leave you.

You're putting too much pressure on yourself. First of all do you actually need to move out yet? If so, does she work? It's not all on you. Communicate the frame as you working together in the relationship and with her as first mate you should have some expectations of her (Sex doesn't count).

Off topic, but you sound seriously addicted to adderall. I personally don't think it is good to be on long term. However, if you really have ADHD I hear it calms you down instead of amping you up. I'm not a doctor, but be careful. It could take years to wean yourself off it so there is no easy answer there.

Title	Self-esteem in the toilet at the end of law school
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	0
Comments	4
Date	June 27, 2016 5:43 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/4q1tvl/selfesteem_in_the_toilet_at_the_end_of_law_school/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/self-esteem-in-the-toilet-at-the-end-of-law-school.184964 https://theredarchive.com/post/184964

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