How to deal with issue of people talking down to me constantly?

SkorchZang · 2015-04-08T04:45:34+00:00

The issue isn't that people are talking to you weird.

People can do whatever they want.

The issue is that when they talk in a certain way, it quickly makes you lose frame. You call it "anxiety". TRP calls it losing your frame. You are the one who sets what the meaning of any interaction is going to be. If you lose that frame, letting the interaction dictate something to you about how you're not good enough or some shit, you can become affected negatively since you think there's something you need to do to stop this.

When you're successfully holding frame, it doesn't matter what people are saying. All it shows is that they're idiots. You're smirking secure in that knowledge, you do not require random people's permission to continue doing you, nor their approval for the way you are.

So the bottom line is:

Step one: People are talking down to you? Let them do whatever they want. 90% of the time that's really it, problem solved. It is funny that they try that shit, let them.
Step two: The other 10%. Decide if it's a situation that's truly worth your total mobilization response. If you decided that you must do something about it, fucking shut that person down with extreme prejudice on the spot. Do not appeal to reason, justice, don't appeal at all. Being civilized is temporarily suspended. Shut them down by bringing the fear of the Lord up in them, animal fear about what's going to happen if they mistakenly fuck with you, the wrong indian guy to fuck with.

Please realize that the way you act and react is inviting these responses from people, they're talking weird to you because you are unknowingly causing them to do it. That's another side of what makes it funny, and not worth the "total mobilization". Their responses are the jolly firstborn children of the way you act and the way you think, gotta cut them some slack since it's all in the fam. If you jump at everyone who does it snarling like a dog, you are not following RP advice, and overreaction is its own type of anxious awkwardness.

SPARTA127 · 2015-04-08T10:32:26+00:00

It's your body language. It says that you are awkward. You need to take strides to fix your posture and your stance.

gucciswahgg · 2015-04-08T16:21:03+00:00

I think you should take a step back and think about if people are constantly talking down to you, or if a lot of it is actually your own insecurities and anxiety that is causing you to overthink situations in a way that is harmful to your mental health and confidence level.

Title	How to deal with issue of people talking down to me constantly?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	2
Comments	5
Date	April 8, 2015 4:07 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/31u41z/how_to_deal_with_issue_of_people_talking_down_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-to-deal-with-issue-of-people-talking-down-to.191214 https://theredarchive.com/post/191214

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