Hello. I am 25, my fiance is 40 and I have been following RedPillWives/RedPillWomen for about a year. I try to apply it to my realtionship with my fiance, but I stuck more to it when I first started reading about it. I have "fallen off the wagon" a bit since the American election because I have been quite put off by the political stuff on the red pill subreddits and femininenotfeminist subreddit and I unsubscribed and distanced myself for a while (i don't want a political discussion, just some RP advice for my problem, please). RP is good for my relationship and for my personal happiness as well.

My fiance (been together nearly 2 years now, engaged ~6 months, living together for just over 9 months now) and I both are dealing with medication-induced lowered sex drives right now but we both still crave the intimacy (and the wonderful mental effects of having SO many orgasms) that 2-3x a day sex used to bring us. I welcome advice....

He is on Zoloft, a high dose, and it has done WONDERS for his depression. However, as the dose has increased gradually, his ability to cum/stay hard has waned. He usually took 30-45 minutes to cum pre-zoloft (15-20 if I do REALLY good and really get him going). Now it is more like 1.5-2 h before we usually just give up, though maybe he can cum (it is unsatisfying though, he says) a couple of times a week. I have improved at bjs and handjobs and he tells me I am doing great and it is all just him.

However, I know I could do more - he likes when I talk slutty and dress like a whore and do my hair curly and all the stuff I know he likes. However, I have been low on energy and had a low sex drive since I got my first Depo shot (birth control). I do not feel interested in overthe top sexual stuff or like spinning crazy sexual fantasies like he likes me to while I jerk or suck him off. It is just mentally exhausting and not sexy for me at all to come up with the sex stories he likes me to make up while I help him cum.... Reading stories to him online also is not something I have been able to get into --- the stories just seem gross to me instead of titalating now.

Before Depo, I had an iud for a year and it gave me HORRIBLE cramps that had me bleeding a cup a day for a week and cramping for at least 50% of each month. It was unliveable with the iud - I had to leave work on more than one occasions from the pain of the cramps. On other occasions I found myself just bleeding staight through my pants, overflowing both my menstrual cup (emptied a mere 1-2 hours before) and my overnight maxi pad. Just bleeding through my pants (always black because of this) during the work day - it is disgusting I could not go home because I did not want to take more sick time.... Anyway, I love the depo because I have no cramps and it even looks like I will likely SKIP my period which is INSANE! I also have a lot more focus than I did before, though my temper is worse than before (before I had essentially no temper though so I think this side effect is okay). However, I don't often feel interested in sex on Depo and while I can give my husband a bj or hand job and do the physical parts well, mentally I am not into it and I can't do the dirty talk like I used to because I don't "feel it".

What I have done so far is done duty sex -- just given the handjobs and bjs to help him get off, but it just takes so long - an hour and a half is a long time! I want to dirty talk but it comes out so AWKWARD when I am not into it. It also takes equally long (and also he rarely cums) if we have intercourse and with intercourse I get tired if I am on top for more than maybe 30 minutes and so does he - we end up switching off but it really does not feel sexy to me to be going at it for so long -- I have gotten blisters on my inner lip frm bjs and also had a sore vagina from sex. I think I should take up squats so I can stay on top for longer and so my body is hotter for him too, but I do not think that is a solution to my problem - though it could help and getting more exercise can help my sex drive sometimes too. Also, next paycheck I get (just a coupel days now...) I am going to put money into my appearance (renew yoga class subscription, hair, nails, waxing done) so that at least I can look good for him even if I I can't always deliver on arousing him mentally through dirty talk. Another option is weed, which in the past has made me crazy horny, but I think that is kind of trashy, I do not want to develop any kind of dependence on it - and it hurts my throat to smoke it ):

Any advice? Thanks so much

EDIT: Made edits so my post answers all the questions in the formula