Should I break up with LTR?

360_no_scope_upvote · 2017-03-27T23:49:11+00:00

Put your foot down immediately with the parents and be a man about it, if she resents you for it then move on.

Why did you even consider talking to the parents? Giving them that much control is disaster, this is manipulative and controlling behavior and your enabling it.

These are the type of people that when your slamming her at your place they Show up unannounced to cock block you and she seems like the type of chick to go along with it.

MattyAnon · 2017-03-28T00:28:11+00:00

Tricky.

Parents are dicks and you should have nothing to do with them.

Long term this is going to get very difficult. Forget having kids with this girl - the parents will insist on being involved, she'll probably let them, you'll be the bitch before you know it (or say hello to the divorceraping from hell).

punchatron · 2017-03-27T23:48:41+00:00

The parents are not being childish. They know exactly what they're doing. They know you have only two options. First is to keep doing what they want thereby feeling they are in control. Second is you stop doing what they want and they will go after your LTR and bad mouth you to her knowing that the stress will cause her to resent you. Either consciously or subconsciously. It doesn't matter. And once she resents you she will no longer respect you and the parents know the relationship will implode. The parents are shit testing you. Hard. Either way they know they win. Unless you can blow them off, maintain your current relationship, and be your own man without repercussions. Unfortunately that's unlikely as they will turn your LTR against you.

Tiway22 · 2017-03-27T23:56:04+00:00

Dude you tell this to your LTR:

"Hey babe, I'm only interested in dating you. Not your family. I want to keep seeing you, but only if your family isn't involved in our relationship."

MrAnderzon · 2017-03-28T01:00:02+00:00

Unfortunately a girl that age is still gonna listen to her parents. Though she probably wouldn't listen to her parents if you would put your foot down to her parents.

You don't have to do anything you don't want to.

And if she "guilts" or manipulate you, which she probably will. HOLD FRAME and do whatever you want.

VasiliyZaitzev · 2017-03-28T01:23:49+00:00

Picking up LTRs brothers from venues and events without even asking me, they just tell LTRs brothers I'll pick them up

"My name is 'Dave' not 'slave'."

Getting groceries for the place LTR and I volunteer at (we volunteer at a concession stand and if parents forget something they give me money to get it)

"My name is 'Jimmy' not 'Gimme'."

Anyway, LTRs parents said that LTR can't see me until we all sit down and talk together about the relationship.

No. Are you dating them? Then no.

When I asked to schedule a time to talk LTRs mother said she will talk to the dad and let me know. However I feel they are trying to drag this out and that they don't want to talk because they don't like me and don't want me dating LTR.

This. They are fucking parasites. Do you srsly want to be around these MFers?

I like this girl a lot and she is great but her parents are both irrational cunts who can't understand simple logic, and that the relationship doesn't involve them.

^ This.

So my questions are should I break up with the girl now or wait until parents actually can meet with me so we can all talk.

No. You should have LTR sneak out of the house so you can fuck her, just like we did in the old days.

LTR is actually telling her parents they are irrational and that they need to schedule a time to talk to me but they don't listen to her. LTR wants to be with me, but if her parents are cunts I can't control that. So I'll have to end it.

You should start plating other girls. Tell your LTR you need to "see other people" unless her parents unfuck themselves. You don't "want" to do it, but if they won't let her see you, well, men have needs. Weaponize her against them.

quicklogaccount · 2017-03-28T02:54:00+00:00

The gas thing was a bad move, you used it to excuse yourself from doing what they told you.
Avoid giving excuses for shit you don't want to do. They're bad politics.
For starters, excuses, such as yours, are prone to display weakness. You "can't" for some reason, so there's something above you, restraining you. In your case it was GAS MONEY, which implies you're a cheap bastard.
Second, excuses have a knack to backfire. You provide a reason to refrain from doing something and in the subtext people understand that if they can solve this reason, you WILL do what you were asked. In your case, they assume that if they give you the money you'll be the driver. And they'll be able to shame you into it.
Third, when people see through the excuse your cowardice and behavior of avoiding confrontation becomes evident.
So, what they see is:
This "manchild" dating our daughter doesn't want to step up for his duties, has no guts to be upfront about it and excuses himself claiming lack of agency, hypo sufficiency, and has no issues being seen as a cheap bastard.
Whether you agree to their vision or not, this is a pretty bad picture you left.

All in all, excuses are lame. They're only acceptable when they're not meant to protect you from the confrontation, but rather meant to soften a blow you'll inevitably throw. And make them strong. Vague and unsolvable.

Past this your reading on her parents is pretty precise. Mommy wants her daughter to find herself a committed beta boy, hopefully mommy doesn't incentivize her to CC ride while searching or "discreetly" so she empowers herself in abundance.
Tell them (be text if you must) you gave some thought to what they said and decided that you'll make your relationship with their daughter about her and not them, and assume you'll find a way as they did.
Then you call her out and forget about them. They can't legally do shit. In my country hardly even throw her out.

If they ever go back on the gas thing, be upfront. Your understanding of a relationship is different and it doesn't seem reasonable to you that they, as her parents, take the freedom to burden her suitors to obligations extending to them. IF she does it herself, on the other hand, you'll discuss it with her and her only.

Title	Should I break up with LTR?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	6
Comments	18
Date	March 27, 2017 11:30 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/61vs7d/should_i_break_up_with_ltr/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/should-i-break-up-with-ltr.216246 https://theredarchive.com/post/216246

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