My boyfriend is so adorable. I love him for the way he laughs and talks and his amazingly perfect sense of humor. His life is sort of a mess right now though, so I don't know if I can chalk up my situation to him being stressed, but here goes:

The girl he used to like is my best friend. She didn't like him back and is actually currently in a relationship (only I know and she's asked me not to tell anyone). Anyway, whenever we're with her I feel like he's embarrassed to be seen with me? And it's hurting me and humiliating. It's not his fault, I'm actually not as good looking as her or even him. The specific thing that happened was we were just screwing around during lunch, and he was all "LMAO look at this bread it looks so weird, touch it" and I was like "hahaha it is weird, also why is your hand shaking so much" (in a casual way) and he was like "I don't know dude it just shakes like that all the time haha" and I was joking around and went "are you diabetic or something? Lmao" and reached over very casually to just steady his fingers and he PULLED IT AWAY. So quickly, too!

I'm pretty sure the expression on my face was one of utter shock. It was like he really didn't want to touch me. And also it's like he doesn't want to talk to me, he doesn't initiate anything. Except when we're alone or something and he initiates the hug then.

And I've been trying to be a good RP gf, I shower him with compliments and all, and I always try to boost his manliness (even though he's a pretty chill and laid back person and not very assertive at all). His brother told me that he must really care about me (following a big incident).

But he doesn't really show it? Like I feel like I'm annoying him whenever I act affectionate and I've asked him about what he wants me to do and all he says is "idk, I really can't answer questions like that lol". And he's just so unboyfriendish I don't know what to do. My friend says he's a really shy person(which I'd true, he's very chill and just bottles up all of his emotions which is hard for me to get since I express everything to people I care about) but come on. Why do I feel like he doesn't even want me?!

I asked him take the 5 Love Languages quiz and he got Quality Time and I got Words Of Affirmation (I already knew this, I write and speak a lot and I express EVERYTHING through words, I communicate really well). And another thing once he got his results he just sent it to me and then didn't even bother to ask what I got. I just sent it to him. : (

And on top of that, the whole situation with the other girl is really a huge punch to my psyche. Like it's not even heartbreak, this is like making my entire being collapse from the inside. It's a direct insult to my entire being and it's hard to process.

I need to glow up. I have a plan underway for this entire spring break to glow up which involves buying clothes and getting even more fit than I already am and practicing talking and confidence. I just want HIM to be happy and proud of me.

Any tips on how to make him proud of me and how to glow up extremely?

I'm asking because I read something about a user on here having a bf who did the hot and cold thing until she got her life together and then he realized that she really was the one.

I want to do the same thing.