I started having a serious medical condition 2 years ago and it's been progressing, I even can't go to gym anymore or do any physical activity and basically live with pain every minute of my life, and I'm scared of it too. I finally managed to save enough money (thousands) to do the surgery in a couple of months which should fix some of it. My mom (divorced) was always aware, and today I told her I'll be coming home in June for the surgery and complained that it's hard to live like that. To which she said 'You can live' in a silly uncaring voice and then immediately proceeded talking about weather. This issue is literally eating me alive and I was thinking about suicide in the past months so when I heard this I was just stunned.

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I mean, I'm aware men shouldn't complain, and I don't usually, but when I did her reaction just fucking killed me. And she was always so proud of doing everything for me when we had arguments about dad.

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I just needed somewhere to vent, sorry there is no question.