So I just started lifting about a month ago and the gains are going okay, gained a couple of pounds, six pack is emerging, the works. I always finish my 2 and a 1/2 hours at gym on a high, feeling good and excited for the next time, but there's this thing at the back of my mind where I feel like I resent myself even more with every rep I take. I just picture the guy my ex left me for, who's the typical Chad, and I feel like me working towards gains and sex appeal is actually me working towards a version of myself that I'll hate.

Has/Is anyone else gone/going through this? Am I overthinking things?

Edit: Not that I hate myself, I hate the Chad, and as a result of me becoming like the Chad, whom I hate, I begin to hate myself. Hope that gives further clarity.