I know everyone thinks their situation is super unique and isn't, but here goes.

I met her about 6 months back through mutual friends. We hung out a fair bit at events with friends. She had a boyfriend (2ish years apparently). She never mentioned her boyfriend to me. She'd go out of her way to avoid doing so. She seemed very attracted and interested in something happening with me but there was a fair social cost for me. I knew of her boyfriend, he worked in my industry and so did his family. It would have been a bad situation, so I decided to avoid it. There could have been a fallout.

It kind of sizzled. I was waiting for her to actually leave her boyfriend which didn't happen, she was probably waiting for me to make some kind of advance which didn't happen.

When nothing happened I just pulled my attention right back. I didn't want to play any more. But when I did this, she seemed just to seem more interested in getting it back, and would literally loiter around me and seemed upset I wasn't talking to her. So somehow I got dragged back into this pattern of talking to her at social events.

She seems genuinely happy that I'm talking to her, and is always trying to update me on her life and wants to know everything about mine. Is always trying to point out when we'll talk next and still seems to completely wipe the fact she has a boyfriend out of all discussion.

But I'm not really wanting to be friends. I'd actually rather nothing than be friends. It sounds petty as I never made an advance. But somehow I'm becoming rather awkward in these little discussions to the point I'm actually sometimes avoiding going to gatherings. Which is stupid. Is there any way I can withdraw my care and stupid oneitis about this? For the record I am seeing another woman. I'm just seeking some encouraging words to look over.