PUA: Digitable Profit

Some advice (long post) for you from a woman:

1. Are all men liars, cheaters, scum of the earth? Are all men the same? No. Neither are women. I find cheating reprehensible and unnecessary. If it ever came to my consideration, I would rather break off my relationship first before that happens. I wouldn't want to be cheated on, so I wouldn't do it to someone else. I don't want people's money either. I work. But if I needed it, my parents are rich. So using a guy for $ would be pointless.

Look for red flags that you're not in a good relationship and don't stay in one. Being secretive with her phone calls/texts, not acting interested in you anymore, demanding money and gifts, treating you like a servant, being emotionally or physically abusive, other sketchy behavior.

1. How to find a real relationship.

Treat women like people. Not objects. Don't play stupid games. Be well groomed. Looking healthy helps (note there are overweight men and disabled men in relationships). Find contentment and self respect so you don't only have complaints and you're not bitter. Make yourself interesting by getting hobbies (including educating yourself about news, books, art, anything good for conversation) you enjoy. Be social so you can meet women. Don't be afraid to talk to women at appropriate times in appropriate situations with appropriate subject matter.

Take cooking classes. Take dog training classes. Coach a kid's soccer team. Visit retirement homes to volunteer. Use meetup.com for singles groups in your area and for hobbies you're interested in. Look for social events. A new bar opening. A wine tasting. A local fundraiser. A local concert venue.

Spark up conversation about these subjects. This is appropriate social exchange. This is not creepy or sleezy.

Don't make things about the way she looks. She's a person, not an object. Some people are uncomfortable with compliments. Don't be a douchebag and insult her. This isn't "teasing". It makes you look unbalanced and oddly aggressive. Resentful and insecure.

Work on good conversation flow. A little bit about you, some interest back on her (I liked the veggie pizza we made. What kind of pizza is your favorite? Etc. Etc. Maybe we could grab a cup of coffee some time after class? I hear blah blah has really good pumpkin spice blah. I could drink that all day. How do you like your coffee?)

Don't "escalate". Don't creep all over her. Let things come naturally. She can initiate too.

It's not up to you to "discipline" or "reward" her. Just be normal and a mature adult.

And if you want BDSM, consent is needed before hand. No means no. Women can most definitely not want to have sex with even very attractive men. It's not "shit tests" unless she's mentally unstable, and WHY would you want to be dating someone with such issues? And why should you want to prey on someone who obviously isn't right in the head?

And btw, at 22 most guys your age are still just immature boys in men's bodies. Be different by having your shit together. It makes you look confident and mature. Plus, it'll get you far in life.

If a woman is using you for money, that'll be painfully obvious. Don't use her back for sex and then cry about what users women are.

Take turns paying for dinner. That's the least awkward way. If she doesn't even offer, that's a red flag. If she does, just say "next time". Then later on, when scheduling that, she gets to pick where since she's treating you.

And remember that feminism means equality. Not superiority. If she's pro-women's rights, that doesn't automatically mean that she's for women being superior to men, or vise versa. And frankly I don't know what normal, mentally healthy woman would want to have her gender suppressed as inferior.

I really wish young men like you didn't get misled by the Anti-Social Personality types. These are sexual predators. Don't be one. Unless you're a psychopath who enjoys hurting others for your own personal gain.

There's also dating apps & websites but these are very superficial. There's no personal connection. Unless your aesthetics just happen to appeal to someone off the bat, from pictures, it's not going to end in a lot of dates. Women also get inundated with messages.