Got with the first woman at 20. Scared shitless of losing her and not finding someone else.

chemical-miracle · 2020-01-17T07:25:13+00:00

Congrats, you have oneitis.

KirthWGersen · 2020-01-17T07:44:46+00:00

Enjoy your time with her, but don't make her the focus of your life. Fill your life with other important things: a woman is only part of it.

When I was young, I didn't chase women. I focused on other things (mainly intellectual pursuits, sport, work and travel) as I wanted to build a foundation for my life and work out which direction I wanted my life to go in. Looking back, I could have fucked so many women, but I wasn't really interested as I had more important things to do. And I enjoyed deepening the relationships I had with women instead of just shagging as many as I could. I guess this is what people mean here when they say to focus on your mission.

I did not realise it at the time, but this made me attractive. Women attached themselves to me without me ever trying. I enjoyed loving them and learning to develop my sexuality with them but other things in my life were always more important. I guess I was more important to me. Many of the girls from back then (25 years ago) are still friends of mine today. Once I start to love a woman, I always love her...

Many years later, after having kids and the most amicable divorce you can imagine, I am in an even better situation. I have a life I love and meeting women is the simplest thing. I can barely go out now without meeting women who are attracted to me. I am not the most amazing guy, not the most handsome, not the wealthiest, not particularly muscular; but the competition is pretty pathetic.

Friends of mine who similarly unknowingly followed the same path find the same. In middle age, our main problem with women is that too many of them want us. And as we focus on ourselves, our families and our lives, they are usually happy to share us. They just want a slice of our company and time, because we are worth it! Focus on YOUR life and it all comes naturally. No woman wants a man who needs her.

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If you can get 1, you can get 2; if you can get 2, you can get 4 ...

It is just like anything in life: a job for instance. For so many people I know, the best experience in their working lives has been losing their job. It forces them to reassess and find something even better.

And it is the same with women: if you think you'll never get a better woman, you'll have a scarcity mentality and fuck it up for both you and her.

Enjoy everything for what it is. Never expect anything to last because nothing can last in this constantly changing life. Learn to enjoy that ambiguity and the excitement of not having everything mapped out.

DarkestShadeOfRed · 2020-01-17T07:47:41+00:00

You have oneitis. Yes i've read this terrible fucking post you made full of the most beta shit I've read today.

The only problems is I always initiate, but every time I see her even though I'm always the one initiating she showers me with affection and we usually fuck 2 times a day. This has been bothering me but things still seem to be working quite well.

Stop worrying about her initiating, your a man and your job is to lead her. If she's down to meet up on your time, and fucks you good stop being a bitch.

This is where the problem comes. I am scared shitless of losing her. Not because she's the 'one', not because I couldn't live without her, or because I love her, but because I'm afraid that it might just be luck having gotten with someone this hot after going through a 20 year dryspell and I wouldn't be able to fuck other girls just like I couldn't for the last 20 years

You haven't been sexless for 20 years, you're 20 years old fuck off. This whole sentence is fucking retarded honestly. You got this girl you can get another, maybe try reading the god damn side bar.

If I had opportunities now, I would fuck other girls. But I don't think that's possible because I feel like my SMV isn't up there (acne, not in the best shape)

Are you doing anything about these problems? Or are you just going on forums and complaining about them? Put in the work and you won't have these thoughts.

This has let me to becoming slightly needy lately, to which she has instantly responded negatively. I wasn't conscious of it, but I realised all the upcoming issues that we're gonna have are gonna be because I'm acting like a bitch, and if that's the case I'm not even gonna blame her for running away.

This is correct. You have very bad oneitis, and zero abundance with a defeatist mindset and are definitely acting like a bitch. Go read the sidebar.

I'm not exactly alpha either

Seriously? Couldn't tell by your writing.

I guess it's refreshing to be with someone that's not a massive pussy

She just hasn't seen yours yet.

This is surprising because I still have a lot of work to do, but this just shows how pathetic most guys are when it comes to women.

Bro you are just as pathetic as them.

My question is how do I get over the fear of not being able to attract other women because of my past and potentially have to be with her and be daunted at the idea of this girl dumping me and me going back to the virgin I was.

You need to change your entire mindset. Start by reading the sidebar, hitting the gym, eating properly, and start interacting with more people to build your social skills.

tiredturtleman · 2020-01-17T08:21:44+00:00

You got her, you can get another. Especially knowing trp truth and improving yourself. It’ll suck but that’s life it’ll only be temporary. Move on and get mentally prepared for the day it comes or you’ll just destroy yourself even more.

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