I had some recent conversations with a small group of LVMs saying how they never take a woman out to a restaurant for the first or second date.

The guys explained to me that its not because they're being cheap. They believe that some women are actually going around using men for free meals and for attention. They said these women just go around getting a free meal and then onto the next man for another free meal, with no intentions of actually dating. I said whats what's so scary about spending maybe $50 on a nice meal, dont you actually want to get to know her? They told me that they are afraid of being taken advantage of!

They said that instead they'll take a woman to the movies or an event, like a festival for the first few dates. They hesitate to take her to a sit down restaurant in fear that she will order the most expensive things and that she'll ghost afterwards. They said that they need to see that she is trustworthy and "not a gold digger" that'll take advantage and they'll usually pick a mediocre restaurant for the first time. They did say they always paid for their dates but that they actually expected for the lady to offer to pay for future times. They think the first few non restaurant dates are like a vetting process to see if the woman is worth their time, and also mentioned how movies and events are more "low key" and "relaxed" than actual dinners. These LVMs were so proud of telling their "strategy" to me laughing it thinking they were so clever. They said they'd never do mcdonalds or fast food as a first date but they would do it later on if the relationship progressed 🥴 these are the guys that will suggest sports bars and chains like applebees/ chilis/ Texas roadhouse/ etc as what they consider to be the nice restaurant date. I think those options are mediocre at best.

I wanted to share this info as to how some lvms think. The thing here is that they are scared to invest money into the relationship, and that they think you have to work your way up for a meal that isn't even pricey. They get the ego stroke of going out to eat without having the high prices or having to actually get dressed up. Then they'll LOWER the bar! Ugh. That one time he took you to applebees will be the nicest you'll ever have it with him. And next time he's gonna be groaning at seeing the bill or saying "its your turn to get the tab."

Seriously ladies, if you've done the pre-date vetting and you're going on the first date keep this on mind! Make sure it's a decent restaurant! Not a diner, not a dumpy bar, not a coffee shop, and not a mcdonalds! I remember one guy asked me to this place I never heard of he was like "I never take women to a restaurant the first time but you seem really special i want to treat you" i saw red flags but googled the restaurant he named. Turns out it was a dirty little dive bar. Of course, it was in a really bad neighborhood and it was all street parking. No one even feels safe walking there in the day light. He had been talking about it like it was the Ritz and upselling it to me. I was appalled that his idea of "nice" and "treating me" was a cheap dirty bar. This was during the predate phone vet. After the phone call he texted me to try to setup the date there and I ghosted, and blocked. He had a lot of red flags in the phone call and admitted in the call he needed a woman by his side for his political events... Too many red flags with him so I ghosted.

Restaurants only!! You really need that face to face sit down time and a meal is a security deposit for the time and energy you invested to meet him, get dressed up, etc.