I would like to thank you awesome ladies! I used to think that I wasn't worthy of having high standards but after reading through this sub, high standards have been normalized for me. It's also inspiring me to hold myself to higher standards if that's what I expect of people in my circle.

Blackrose_ · 2021-01-03T06:53:26+00:00

Since joining this sub, I've made an interesting observation. I've increased my blocking of male users.

I stupidly when I joined, was prepared to wear the back and forward from people who were subtly trolling me on Reddit. I'm currently fresh from an argument supporting reproductive rights for women, and that attracts all sorts of weird allies.

But what I have found is that I get these back and forward "conversations" that descend in to abuse and they have the hall marks of male entitlement. They immediately loath the fact that I won't retract my statements that are pro-women, and hate that I can hold my own in an argument.

So they will pull a bunch of illogical arguments, straw man argument, arguments from belief, arguments from "I know someone" all with the same inability to view the statement that I'd posted and agree or disagree with it. It is absolutely endemic to Reddit threads that are popular and have a bias against women.

Since I've been reading about high standards - ta FDS, I have also considered the term "Sea Lioning" taken from a cartoon of being trolled by a really unattractive type that never actually want to debate the issue at hand (generally because it's not in their interest to do so) and continue to berate, abuse, gaslight, tangent and generally soak up energy to reply too.

What is really interesting is that the same sort of bullshit is apparent on those "Male Depravity" flagged posts especially with the back and forward on face book, where it starts out "Heyyy Beautiful" and ends up in all sorts of depraved bullshit. Generally about 4 sentences in the subtle and not so subtle putdowns start happening "You're not that pretty" "I could get another" bla bla or in my case "You're argument is illogical" and then when you call them out on their bullshit all you get is more abuse.

The thing is, this is a common thing and I'm moving more to blocking more LVM users because generally these shit comments are from throwaway accounts that are less than 6 months old tops where it's pretty obvious that I'm on my only account and that it has plenty of stuff attached to it.

So. I agree with this post. You need to hold higher standards with the type of potential abusive comments flung your way on other boards in reddit. Block hard as soon as you see put downs. I have not felt uncomfortable in FDS. So I'm mulling over if this is one of those pivot moments where I can add this to my day to day life.

It's given me much to consider.

Phoenix__Rising2018 · 2021-01-03T03:41:40+00:00

Good job! Seeing it here every day makes us slowly absorb it and change for the better. It's amazing how that happens.

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