Summary:

Hereby follows some examples of a particular miserable, entitled, shameless and manipulative woman. Dealings my parents have gone through and keep going through.

Body:

Now, my parents are traditional in a sense. My father is the breadwinner and handyman. My mother sees to the nest, cooks and cleans. They are both retired, my dad still works. Their dynamic however, is not RP.

A family of five, wife and husband and their three daughters, moved next door to my parents say 10 years ago. A couple years later the couple divorced. The man moved away, leaving the woman with the kids and the house. Before this, my parents never spoke with them. This changed, as the now divorced woman started coming over, speaking mainly with my mother. They pitied her. They wanted to lend her a hand. (Must be tough, getting the house and the kids). Mostly my mother became a wall to bounce thoughts and emotions off (emotional tampon), my father became the fixer. Luckily my father realized the folly of this later on, but the damage was done. My mother still talks with this woman, but has distanced herself somewhat and speaks her mind and takes it all with a grain of salt. My father wants nothing to do with her. I've met the woman, I don't acknowledge her when she shows on those occasions I'm visiting my hometown.

The woman has three daughters. The oldest is 16. This girl hangs with older guys who drive drunk on occasion. She disappears on Friday and comes back on Sunday, without mentioned where or with whom she's been. If the mother asks where she's going she answers: none of your fucking business or just "away". Neither parents have any handle on her. When they are at their dad's they come and go as they please. I won't be surprised of this girl gets pregnant or worse any time soon. The youngest daughter acts mentally abnormal, with very specific and weird behaviors. Talking to herself, grimacing, won't go into the house unless someone's at home.

The woman accepted my dad's and mom's help. Over time, she grew to expect it.

Ask to plant some strawberry plants. Sure thing, dad brings over dirt and does it. When the strawberry season comes, the woman hasn't gotten enough space in her freezer for it all, asks to put some of it into my parents' freezer (instead of offering my dad them for the help to plant them). Cuts some branches of a three, asks if dad can throw them away. Sure thing, dad does it. Flat tire? Brings it over. Dad asks my mom where the hell did this come from? No idea. Woman turns up. Haven't you fixed it? No. Oh, welll your wife told me you wouldn't mind. He dumps it unfixed on her yard, he's had enough. They have two rabbits. She can't tend to them properly so my parents do it. The woman's brother even told her she doesn't feed them enough. She doesn't give a fuck and just laughs it off.

The woman is looking for a man. But not just any man. She openly stated, to my mother, that she's looking for someone to drive her to her summer house, fix stuff around the house and keep her company once in a while. She doesn't care if they have sex. Hello BB, you won't even be getting pity sex for this superb offer. She goes out dancing on weekends and boasts about how every man seems so enthralled by her presence.

Lessons:

Don't do nice things for people unless you do it without expecting anything in return, you get paid in some way or another or the recipient returns the favor on a later date. Your time is valuable. If the time comes that you actually go out of your way and do something nice, the person is more likely to be grateful. If you do nice things all the fucking time, it's no longer kind of you, but a given.

Don't give even an inch, the entitled will take a whole fucking chunk in one bite instead and come to expect more as time progresses.

Children need stability and structure. A core family should provide this so the children can grow into capable, healthy adults. The dynamic between man and woman is crucial. The man will not tolerate disrespect nor misbehavior. Nip that shit in the bud. You are the patriarch, you are the law. Don't be all buddy-buddy but enforce and earn your family's respect.

The juice ain't worth the squeeze many times. Don't ignore the big damn red flags. Plenty of women boys. You want sex, fun and passion. Not servitude, contempt and smaller wallet. That's what you get for being Beta Bucks.

Don't make other people's shitty problems into your problems, it just causes needless headaches.

Feel free to fill in on others lessons if any come to mind, my head's a blank.