Hello my fellow MGTOW Warriors, Q - What's the best startegy or technique that you can use to control your emotions and urges???

DangZagnut · 2019-07-18T15:03:08+00:00

It will be extraordinarily difficult right now. Do not take this as insulting.

You're young, the world is, comparatively, new to you. You're experiencing many things for the first time. Most likely you're growing up in a fairly civilized country, which means you have a bunch of social bullshit to traverse, also for the very first time.

You're overloaded with a ton of hormones affecting your growth and your brain development will not even reach some sort of foundational stability for another 7 years or so.

Ride it out like a video game to be amused by, but if you lose points who gives a shit. Viturally nothing going on right now is important. You can fuck up a lot of things, but most things you are dealing with absolutely isn't worth the shit it seems to be.

Far in the future you'll probably look back and wonder why you squandered it all getting your hackles up for no reason compared to the real issues in life, which are formidable and basic at the same time. The shit you're dealing with now doesn't matter.

What you can screw up:

issues relating to health
drug or alcohol use normalizing an outlet to dealing with problems rather than facing them
issues relating to education or success which will end up having a fairly big impact on how the next half century goes for you
wasting emotional energy on shit that doesn't matter, and ending up in situations that will fuck your future life up and cause emotional issues because you're choosing to get mad at shit that doesn't matter.

How you can deal with emotions:

extricate yourself from toxic people no matter who they are. Parents, friends, relationships, whatever. You haven't hopefully gone so far that you can't break up with some chick with no penalties.
you are 18 so if you are having familial problems you can leave at any time.
you owe no one but yourself
if there are situations or people that bother you, you can neutralize them, or just stay away from them. There's very little you have to do in life, but right now you think you have to do a lot of things that don't matter in the future.
if you have anger issues, really find out what you're angry about. Most times you're the cause of it and could mitigate it if you really think about it.

GrisBosque · 2019-07-18T15:21:13+00:00

As Buddha pointed out: Anger results from not understanding the true circumstances.

What this means, is anger is better replaced with patience and questing for truth.

And patience is potentially infinite.

Also in the Tao there's a phrase repeated at least three times...

"Guard the senses!"

It took me a long time to figure out the better translation;

"control your emotions!"

The Cerebrial cortex is the home of logic... and it can control the more primitive lizard brain.

Whilst those of the smaller brain gender have a harder time doing this...

And I think we here are well aware of the differences in results?

sidxus · 2019-07-18T15:17:26+00:00

take up a martial arts like ju jitsu. something that forces you to keep your cool in tough situations yo suceed. it will eventually become instinct

CuntMonteCristo · 2019-07-18T15:27:47+00:00

Traditional Martial Arts

thewrecker8 · 2019-07-18T15:30:42+00:00

As someone else said you're at a funky stage of life. You're becoming a man (even though legally you are). But you're at like peak hormones stage, you're not really a kid anymore but you don't have much "adulting" under your belt. Find something to channel your energy into (not video games or drugs). Something that can benefit you in life. Go to the gym, take up mixed martial arts. Both are good for overall health and MMA will help you realize that anger not only can inhibit your ability in a fight but also teach you that no matter how big and bad you might think you are there's always someone bigger or who can humble your ass quick.

Or take up an instrument, different language, etc. Something you can focus all that energy on. You might be angry just because you're not occupied enough. If you're busy focusing your time and energy on something you're too busy to get angry all the time.

quickGunShoot · 2019-07-18T15:03:31+00:00

Get into lifting.

iseehot · 2019-07-18T15:08:09+00:00

Get a grip on yourself.

HotAndColdSlaw · 2019-07-18T15:23:39+00:00

The important thing here is not to not fuck up, but to avoid major fuck-ups.

When young, everybody fucks up. It is normal, expected, and nothing to get upset about.

The problems start if your fuck-up ruin your life.

If you get angry and punch a guy and he falls bad and dies, well you have to go to juvie or prison for 5~10 years or so. This fucks up your life.

If you drink too much (like every day or every week-end) or do too many drugs and fuck up your brain, well your life is fucked.

If you get some girl pregnant and she wants to keep it and get married and you want to do the "right thing", well your life is fucked.

One thing which helped me was to get a part time job, which gave me a little bit of money and keep me out of trouble.

Another thing is study. You are a student so you should try to get good grades.

Another thing is a hobby. Music, sports, art, outdoors, woodworking, whatever floats your boat.

When I got angry at my parents over stupid things, I would go outside for long walks until I could cool down and think about the situation carefully.

I hope something here helps you a little bit.

itsamantripathi · 2019-07-18T15:27:22+00:00

I'm proud of you for having the courage to assess your own behavior, recognizing that it's not optimal and that you need help, and for then reaching out to others for guidance. You have taken a crucial step in moving towards becoming a balanced man; please feel free to message me directly if you think that would be helpful. Also, my response is long because I'm trying to pay forward what I've learned from others; however, the length also indicates that this path is not easy and will require significant effort if you truly desire to transcend your biology.

As a bit of background, I did not handle my emotions very well for most of my life, but I've worked hard, sought and received help, and modified things in my life in such a way that it helped me transcend my biology/emotions most of the time. I still fail and have bad days, but I have fewer lapses and now understand how to maintain balance and peace in my life. Here is what worked for me:

Mental Health - I was assessed by several medical professionals over several years and most of the initial diagnoses were incorrect. Initially, they thought I had ADHD and anxiety, but it was actually Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD); my manifestation of ASD is similar to Asperger's and is relatively mild. Actually, I benefit greatly from my non-typical neural configuration and tend to see patterns more quickly than others, so I tend to outperform other investment managers in terms of returns on invested capital (ROIC). The point is that you may or may not have an underlying medical condition that is affecting your ability to regulate your emotions, so it would be good to meet with a competent medical professional who can guide you through the process of self-discovery.

Psychological Baggage - Like many, I had a rough childhood in some ways, and a great childhood in other ways. Some of the mechanisms I used to protect myself (I was actually protecting my emotional fragility) caused me to react to various stimuli with anger. In terms of fight or flight, I'm more oriented to "fight." I worked through my issues by facing them, as you are now doing, and accepting what happened and who I am. Then I began to strengthen my mind, fully accepting myself with all my flaws, and building myself into a man bit by bit over many years. I read books about personality, trauma, habits, stoicism, and others. I've found that yoga and meditation are immensely valuable practices that have helped ground and heal my soul; you might benefit from these practices as well. Mushrooms and weed can help you minimize your ego, making it easier to face your issues, and helping to transcend them, but they can also serve as a hindrance if abused; use a guide as this path should not taken without consideration and a healthy spirit.

Exercise - If you don't exercise, you won't be healthy. Being healthy helps to balance your emotions. You will feel better about yourself. You will look better. You will have more energy to engage and overcome life's challenges. Exercise is a foundational element of living well.

Diet - If you eat a poor diet, your health will suffer. The worse I eat, the worse I feel. If I feel bad, I have less strength and make worse decisions. I make better decisions when I eat well and have a greater capacity to regulate my emotions when eating a diet of largely natural food. Alcohol is pleasant, but can create significant turmoil in your life if you consume too much too often.

Sleep - I need a regular, full sleep schedule to function well. If I don't get enough sleep, then I don't exercise or eat right and my mind slips into a lower state where I don't function well, make poor choices, and generally fail to regulate my emotions.

Habits - You won't solve your problems overnight. You will get angry again. You will fail, repeatedly. That's okay. Stick with it. Try to do better today than you did yesterday, but when you fail, try to understand why. I wasn't able to regulate my emotions and behaviour until I understood their roots. Understanding causality brings control and with control you can begin to choose what you want. If the root of your emotions is a person, then maybe that person shouldn't be in your life. If the root is jealousy, focus less on what the other person has and figure out what you can do to get what they have or maybe you want something different that the root of the jealousy is revealing. For example, maybe you don't really want a lambo. Maybe you really want to be respected and wealth confers respect, but wealth is generated by competence, among other things, so maybe the root of wanting a lambo is actually a desire to be competent and respected by one's peers, also, then all the ladies will want your nuts. You see how this works.

Now, go figure out what you need to do to transcend your own biology and become the man that you want to bring into existence. Good luck. We're all rooting for you.

Ricky584 · 2019-07-18T15:45:18+00:00

Overdose myself with red pill and black pill. Also keep my head busy all the time.

thewrecker8 · 2019-07-18T16:14:44+00:00

Another thing you can explore is meditation. There's tons of YT videos but you can also download an app called Headspace. You get a 10 day trial course for free which should be enough to give you a general idea how to do it. Likely the biggest reason you're angry is due to external circumstances affecting you internally (in your head).

The key is to observe those thoughts and let them flow past without focusing on them. Think of a running stream (that's your mind) in a stream there's all kinds of shit floating downstream through it (sticks, leaves, etc etc.) If you focus on that stick (problem or what's angering you) you're letting it control your mind. But if you're just like (there's a stick, I know it's there, there it goes) and focus on the stream (your breathing for example) it just keeps floating downstream. You're not running along the stream fixated on it. Hope that makes sense but if you spend a little time even with that app it can't hurt.

unpropaganda · 2019-07-18T17:21:22+00:00

Physical paper journal.

Good supply of pens.

Write until your hand hurts.

Then write some more.

Getting it all out on paper is very therapeutic.

Title	Hello my fellow MGTOW Warriors, Q - What's the best startegy or technique that you can use to control your emotions and urges???
Author	itsamantripathi
Upvotes	9
Comments	34
Date	July 18, 2019 2:31 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW/comments/cet8eo/hello_my_fellow_mgtow_warriors_q_whats_the_best/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW/hello-my-fellow-mgtow-warriors-q-whats-the-best.425665 https://theredarchive.com/post/425665

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