Always remember: "LIFE IS GOOD"

Sometimes it seems like shit but brother stop, close your eyes, and BREATHE.

You are the result of a billion billion accidents of nature and you are given - if you are lucky - a century on this little blue planet. Make the most of it.

It's all farts in the wind and even if you become Ozymandias your feats will be lost in the dust.

And here we are lamenting over bitches.

Whether it's sex or money the key is "just ask". Do you want to cut a business deal? Just ask. Do you want to sleep with that supermodel? Just ask.

There is no mystery, no magic. Some would call it a numbers game but I am a bit more nuanced.

If you are middle aged and despondent then wake the fuck up. Spend a bit of your hard earned cash on some good clothes, get your head out of your ass, seduce that little 20-something, make some coin on the side from your work-a-day job.

If you are a teenager or 20-something, WHAT THE FUCK are you doing reading this? As above, get some good clothes, get your head out of your ass, do something FOR YOU.

LIFT. For the love of God, Lift. More muscles, more confidence, more pussy.

Always have two jobs: one to pay the bills and one to get rich off of.