for around 4-5 months ive been reading up on the philosophy of the red pill and generally tried to improve myself. However I've never been in a romantic relationship (17 yrs old) and never experienced a catalyst or whatever that many experience with a woman that truly makes them swallow trp.

today I had my catalyst that opened my eyes and im stunned to be honest. It has to do with my family.

During summer my family goes to Poland to the village my mother comes from. her father and mother were peasants. as long as I can remember there has been huge fights within this family, with my grandfather being on my mothers side vs every1 else.

My mothers side of the family is all kinds of fucked up due to primarily a feud in inheritance. my grandfather died when he was fucking 64, 12 yrs ago. my mother got all the land that he owned which caused great rifts between my mother, grandmother and her sister and brother.

I thought the inheritance was solved several years ago but today it got brought up again for some reason and a huge fight ensued. And now I understand everything thats wrong with my mothers family. My grandmother is a psychopath who fucked my mother, my uncle and my aunt in the brain. and I have no doubt that my grandfather died due to the tremendous stress she caused him. from the little i remember of him I remember his voice, a fantastic voice for a fantastic talker. even though he was a peasant when he wore a suit and fixed his hair etc you'd think he was a lawyer.

and my aunts husband (who unfortunately had to get involved, had to drive fucking 100 km to get their stupid children and my gm out of our house) who I respect a lot is being fucked now the same way by my aunt. he is incredibly handsome, he looks like Tom Cruise. yet my aunt screamed at him as if he were a dog because he was listening to my mother about what had happened.

Two great men, my grandfather and my aunts husband, were turned from stallions into insects by their batshit crazy wives, who are manipulative, greedy, selfish, etc. My aunt even spoke ill of her own dead father, calling him an alcoholic and more.

Idk I honestly cried thinking about all this and dont know how I can trust women anymore after all this. thanks if you read my post, really needed to get this out somewhere.