Is fear of being lonely the biggest motivator for men to marry?

tramese · 2018-10-22T17:22:24+00:00

social narrative...that's the only thing women can do, guilt trip you into doing things. brain wash and psychological warfare, because physical warfare women cannot win.

Zachjsrf · 2018-10-22T17:22:44+00:00

REPEAT AFTER ME. THERE IS NO BENEFIT TO A MAN TO GET MARRIED. Also its pressure that motivates, fear of whatever, etc etc.

PubliusVirgilius · 2018-10-22T17:16:57+00:00

[deleted]

qagg · 2018-10-22T17:18:11+00:00

Well what are the alternatives if you want to have kids and want to raise them yourself? You can be Chad (if you work hard for it red pill style, and still...) but then your kids will be raised by some cuck. Or you can make you gf pregnant and then marry her. This way you’ll be reasonably sure the first kid at least is yours. I can see some logic in this. Then again she may divorce you and your kid will still be raised by someone else.

2018-10-22T18:49:07+00:00

I think it's a strong desire for intimacy, rather than fear of loneliness.

It's also just because it's the done thing and they don't want to be judged.

CommanderHeMan · 2018-10-22T23:18:44+00:00

Supposedly.

It genuinely surprises me that people get lonely. Being alone is bliss.

Sol_Install · 2018-10-22T18:15:31+00:00

It's over all FEAR and HOPE. They HOPE it will make them happy but tolerate it because of FEAR. Fear of being shamed. Fear of being alone. Fear of being unable to get sex. Fear of divorce. Fear of losing their kids. Fear. Fear. Fear.

And some women don't leave. You can end up with her never leaving. Not because she doesn't want to but because it's "cheaper to keep her." We even have Silver Divorces i.e. men getting cleaned out in their retirement age and forced to work until they die. How many times have we heard "She deserves something" i.e. money? Imagine having children with this woman and she's only doing it because she thinks she will have a comfortable life.

DWShimoda · 2018-10-22T18:56:32+00:00

As I've explained in the past, having grown up in such, a LOT of men are habituated (at a very DEEP/subconscious level of their psyche) to a noisy/chaotic/drama-filled house...

So much so, that it becomes their idea of a "home" -- the only environment i which they feel "comforted" (again at that DEEP psyche level) -- even though it is very likely also highly frustrating/aggravating to them on the upper "conscious" level.

I know of guys who quite literally CANNOT get a decent night's sleep* unless they know their are other people -- or at least "living breathing 'mammalian' creatures" SOMEWHERE lurking about (sometimes even the mere 'existence' of dog or cat in the household {hiding under a chair, etc} is sufficient to quell the "psyche" fears; other times the animal needs to be more directly 'present'; sleeping on the end of the bed or at least in the same room) -- and of course there ARE some who cannot feel "comfortable" without the presence/noise of other HUMANS (to at least some minor degree).

* While that may seem "absurd" -- at least to those of us USED to "solitude" -- this is a very REAL, and often is a substantially debilitating ("crazy-making") thing for them. Lack of sleep (especially over weeks & months) is a major cause of various neuroses & even psychoses... they literally "go nuts" -- negatively affecting ALL aspects of their life, including health -- without someone (anyone) else in their home.

Such men** (especially those for whom a dog or other pet is insufficient as a "housemate") are essentially INCAPABLE of "going MGTOW" -- at least not LONG term -- they might be able to manage by sharing some apartment with another person (non-intimate "roommate/housemate"); but such arrangements are tenuous at best, and so it is virtually inevitable that they will seek to "lock down" a more permanent arrangement... IOW marriage (to whoever, whatever, will agree to such an arrangement, and likely no matter the cost in either financial terms OR overall "sanity"... because for them the alternative is actually WORSE).

** And presumably this is also likely true of many women as well... hence the series of transient "boyfriends" (often parasitic dindu's).

MrMannheim · 2018-10-23T03:54:08+00:00

Men THINK that not getting married means being lonely for the rest of their life, but the complete opposite is true: your wife will drive away all of your friends, family, hobbies, and any kind of personality you have to connect with other people.

The unmarried man is free to befriend with whomever he pleases. No forced family socials, no forced babysitting while the boys go out for drinks (and she goes out to "dance" because she's oh so stressed), no giving up your hobbies and the potential frienships that may stem from that.

You are literally free to be as alone or sociable as you damn well please.

87Shane · 2018-10-22T18:22:35+00:00

They are idiots and think that having a wife will make others like them more, cause like they passed the "female" test (women are so excellent with picking personalities.) They are kind of right because they do have bigger chances to make other couple friends to spend time with, but those people will be idiots too and they'll still all dislike each other so I don't understand why it's a goal worth pursuing.

TheLastMgtow · 2018-10-22T18:34:58+00:00

Its much bigger than that obviously. Especially the part that they saw their fathers doing it, its a pretty big argument, and one hard to defeat in our hearts.

RedditUnrealAcct · 2018-10-22T19:16:58+00:00

Myself, I thought I found a unicorn. Wanted kids.

Married a butterface. Two kids and 15 years later body matches face in the worst possible way.

Well, at least the kids are good looking.

2018-10-22T21:27:19+00:00

[deleted]

thetempleofapollo · 2018-10-22T23:21:10+00:00

Men marry for different reasons at different points in their lives.

They’re in love. They want kids. Family expectations. Shotgun. Loneliness. FOMO when all their friends are getting married.

jamesdanton · 2018-10-22T23:31:01+00:00

It takes me a long time to adjust to being on my own and I find it very difficult but once that period is over and you can get yourself moving on your own there is a peace and serenity to life alone that is mostly unfamiliar to me but also welcome.

FlyingSexistPig · 2018-10-23T00:22:23+00:00

I remember when I was in elementary school, thinking that the worst thing for me would to be alone when I turned 35.

I think that fear drove my decisions. Oh how wrong they were. I think that fear drove my marriage to failure, ("Just tell me what to do and I'll do it. Just don't leave" hurl). And it's the red pill knowledge that ironically keeps my current gf around, though I'd be fine if she left.

Starshitlord · 2018-10-23T00:57:33+00:00

I’m fine being the cool uncle to all my fiends with kids, buy them cool toys for birthdays and christmas. That enough kids in my life. If I ever get lonely I’d just get a dog, take him for walks, just get out more.

CloNe817 · 2018-10-23T02:48:31+00:00

It's pussy. Just wait till sexbots get good enough. Women will lose the only value they have to men.

satansbarbedcock · 2018-10-23T03:30:15+00:00

And to keep up with social expectations.

My co-workers all thinks its super weird I don't have some 40% body-fat time and money sink to go home and keep working for.

Cestus_Saphrax · 2018-10-23T05:55:34+00:00

When i was a single, i wanted to have a woman for the rest of my life. When i was married i wanted to be single again. Now that i am single again i just think "WTF - what a waste of time between my single life"

ZombieNinjaPenguin · 2018-10-23T06:13:17+00:00

It's that or, more specifically, fear of dying alone. But a partner/family is no longer a relative promise against that either, with rising populations in nursing homes and assisted living. These people know when their family only bothers to visit to try to maintain inheritance ties and remain in good graces. It's a gamble any which way you go.

Better to build a bank of experiences and moments of pride, which can always be reflected upon in times of need and are significantly more difficult for the world to take from you (memory issues are a devil, but I'd still accept that risk instead).

2018-10-23T07:34:28+00:00

I wanted kids - and got them. Then she decided to end the marriage.

PubliusVirgilius · 2018-10-22T17:39:08+00:00

" It seems to me most men marry out of fear. Mainly peer presure and being affraid of being lonely. " - I don't have an opinion either way but hanging an argument on 'it seems to me' is pretty poor. That's as bad as the left with loonies with their 'feelings' instead of data and statistics.

Why not do some research and come back with information instead of some 'it seems' bullshit.

Title	Is fear of being lonely the biggest motivator for men to marry?
Author	PubliusVirgilius
Upvotes	62
Comments	39
Date	October 22, 2018 5:11 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW/comments/9qfu19/is_fear_of_being_lonely_the_biggest_motivator_for/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW/is-fear-of-being-lonely-the-biggest-motivator-for.471227 https://theredarchive.com/post/471227

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