This may turn into a lengthy post so I'll include a TLDR at the end.

To give some background I'm on the younger side and have been lurking for a couple weeks gathering knowledge and opinions from this sub. College grad this year, work in IT w/ decent pay, got my own place, tall not the most fit but not a lard.

Recently I was hit up by a girl I fooled around with in hs. I tended to go for crazies then (still unfortunatly do), as she texted me drunk/ high that she was divorcing her marine hubbie. They had a kid, got married out of hs and he had cheated on her their whole marriage. Clearly looking for validation she sent the nudes and made plans to visit. Cool so far. It should be noted she has serious mental issues and aesthetically is akin to those pinup suicide girls which I'm more than down for.

Anyways the night arrives and shes picking up things before she gets to my place. Unprompted asks for what I want to drink, buys me a bottle of gin. Stops by a store I ask her to pickup firewood which she does. Also surprises me with a bit of green too so all seems well. We talk catch up, make drinks, and put on a shitty horror movie.

At this point I've already kissed her and go to make moves but she exclaims "stop, lets watch the movie" her tone was playful I go a bit further until shes serious and we continue on watching.

Movie ends and by then shes clutched around my arm, I've been lightly touching her leg throughout and pretty much think this a done deal. Then she wants to put on another. Alright fine. Now its like 12:00 and she falls asleep on my shoulder having some type of dream because she twitches throughout. I wake her up and tell her lets go to bed. (This point sex seeming less likely)

She then does a complete 180.

Calls an uber saying she'll pick her car up in the morning. When I straight forwardly ask what changed her mind. She says "I think we're looking for different things, I'm not really used to affection". And this my friends. This was the icy splash of water on my boner. It made me stop and think.

Before she came I knew I was not trying to make her a LTR. And told her straight up. Looking back however thats not how I acted. I was too caring. In college I would hookup with girls and at the right moment of fun/ intoxication would initiate and boom magic. Thats not what I did here. Shes been a soft spot for me and she knows it but ultimately it was I who subverted the whole reason she was there by being caring and giving her flashbacks of her failed marriage.

It was a wakeup call and one that comes especially harsh since I haven't gotten laid in a couple weeks. So. Since I am a youngster here I'd like opinions or pointers on where I went wrong. What I should have done differently. (Which I think I already know and that is to have initiated harder.) On the plus side though she bought gin, green, and firewood for me before she ghosted until her next failed relationship. Am I bitter/ angry? Hell yeah I am. Not at her, at myself, for not just going all in.

TLDR; Hottie with mental issues hits me up for validation. She buys me shit, I entertain with too much affection, she doesnt wanna seal the deal then leaves.