Back when i was still a child my mother was acting like a harpy, she would shout and getting agressive over every little incident and my dad would do nothing to discipline her..

​

When i did something wrong, he would beat me up, if he didnt like something about me.

One time at the age of about 6 he has beaten me up with a belt so badly, that i still have scars on my back..

​

My sister told me, that he once has bashed my head against the wall and i dont even remember that..

​

Then one time we were walking in public and i was laughing and he didnt like it and he hit me so hard, that i have hit my head against the street..

​

My parents basically turned me into a mental case and they didnt really care

​

I was mentally broken by them, sadly i have still to live with them, because i couldnt find a job for a long time and right now i dont earn enough (im a trainee in a relatively big company in my town and my coworkers are so friendly and lovely)

​

Today my "dad" came into my room, said hello, i didnt say anything, because i figured he will try to connect again with me, after all these years of neglect and abuse.. i know he is a hyppocrite and i tell you he wouldnt have looked even twice at me, if i wouldnt be working in an office (i guess now im finally worthy of his attention)

​

He kept talking and talking, i had my headphones on, then he walked towards me, trying to reach out for my headphones, i grabbed his hand firmly, held it for a few seconds, didnt even look at him and then threw it away (thankfully i grew up to be bigger than him and i also did martial arts, plus i do work out, so i guess that also helps)

​

It felt so good, after all these years of beeing mentally and physically abused by him.

Then he got angry, started to shout (get out of this house and all) my heart started to pound, but i didnt say anything, i didnt show any emotions, i thought if he would get agressive, i would easily have the upper hand, because im not an old, short, fat man and thanks to my martial arts knowledge he would be an easy target

​

I guess times have changed for him and my mother, because they no longer behave towards me like they did in my youth..

​

I dont care if he says, that i should not eat his food, or live in his place, i will do it anyway

He owes me, because if he would have treated me like a human beeing, when i was still a child, i would have already be having a well paying job.. (im 24 and i got my first job as a trainee like 8 months ago, if i finish it, im going to get a position in that company)

​

I wish i would earn like 200-300$ more, but as a trainee sadly i dont get enough to move out, so i have to play the long game and stick around with them..

​

But man it feels so good when the bullys of my childhood cant do anything to me anymore

​

Personally i wish i wouldnt be such a cold person, but in this world where there is no love, power becomes everything