For those that keep messaging me for an update, it was posted long ago, and it can be found here.
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Two weeks ago we were two weeks away from getting married.
She asks me to go to therapy with her. She was already seeing a therapist on her own, and wanted me to go with her and have a talk, before the wedding, where we could be completely honest with one another. That sounded a little weird to me, I thought we were already completely honest with one another, after all, we were getting married in two weeks, right?
Also, she was super protective about her therapy sessions, didn't really talk about them. I have never met her therapist. So to be invited there all of a sudden seemed a little out of place to me.
The day comes, and I go there. But out of self preservation, I had my phone opened and recording any audio.
My fiance was already there. I had to wait 20 minutes before I was invited in. The therapist greets me and shakes my hand. We have small talk. She tells me I am not at all the way my fiance described me. I think she is trying to compliment me. Then she looks at my fiance and tells her "this may be harder than we thought."
That absolutely weirded me out. But I am a calm and collected individual, and I don't react, just kept that dumb smile on my face we all have in awkward situations.
So the therapist starts talking. Has a small speech I don't care to repeat. My fiance takes my hand as the therapist starts telling me that "we live in a modern world, and that my fiance wants us to have a non-conventional marriage moving forward."
I smile, I am not sure what the hell that means, through my mind I am thinking she wants to talk how she will not be a slave to her husband, she will not sacrifice her work life, etc. Modern woman and girl power and all that.
Nope, she is actually talking about how once we get married, she wants to be free to sleep with other men.
The other non-traditional type of marriage. I forgot it's 2018.
But she loves me a lot, and would not be comfortable with me having the same "benefits".
Because she would be too heart broken knowing that I find other women attractive and that one of them could steal me from her.
So I let them finish talking. They were very fluent, and they got more confident talking, probably empowered by my lack of reaction, and because I wasn't saying anything. This was definitely something they have rehearsed.
I then asked the therapist if she is licensed. This, by her reaction, was not what she expected to be the first thing coming out of my mouth. She said yes. So I told her to explain to my fiance why we will not be getting married any more, and why we will not continue being a couple starting immediately.
I wished them good luck, and left the office.
Now, I want to report the therapist. I am not sure if I have to report her to the clinic, or is there a board that supervises therapists? I don't think their planning and attempt to corner me is professional conduct, and I want her to pay for the misconduct. That "session" did not sit well with me.
To be clear, there would have been no positive outcome to this talk my fiance and the therapist had with me. Even if she wanted a completely open marriage, where I could sleep with other women, the outcome from my part would have been the same. That's is not a marriage, that is a sham.
It also dawns on me, she might have cheated on me. Now that I have this clarity of mind, certain things don't match up.
So I was a fool anyway.
I listened to the recording, and I still can't believe what was said there.
Anyway, I called off the wedding.
I am a very easy going guy, there are no fights with me because I am not seeking them. There are no conflicts, enemies, because my life is guided on principle and common sense. That might have given my ex the impression I will be easy to walk over, like a door mat, but she is an idiot for thinking that. Having listened to the recording a few times, I am confident the therapist recognized I am not how my fiance must have described me in their sessions.
hence the "this may be harder than we thought."
Now that the wedding is no longer happening, people are starting to ask questions I am not comfortable answering.
How do I navigate this sea?
I am sure my ex is doing damage control, but I have the recording, and if she goes too far off the path, I will not shy letting people know what she wanted us to talk about.
But my parents and family also want answers, and I am not sure what BS to tell them. I don't want them to think I am an idiot for allowing my ex to get to this point where she was so confident that she straight out told me she wants to fuck other dudes.
She is also blowing my phone, my best friend's phone, my brother's phone.
"We can work on this", "I didn't understand what they were telling me in the therapy session", "she will do anything to fix this", "it was the therapist's idea, she was against it", etc.
Last cry of a dying siren. All her cries fall on deaf ears, and I am the owner of said ears.
We were also working to get a loan to buy a house, but I cancelled everything.
I basically erased any ties we had financially, or otherwise.
Her current plea is that in therapy she exposed her insecurities about our sexual history. I had considerably more partners than her, and the therapist came up with the idea we should "level the field".
Regardless of the truth of this, that therapist gets reported once I figure out where to do it, and what to say.
This post is mostly a rant, but I would also want to know how would you handle the questions of friends and family. My Ex is certainly doing her own damage control, and I don't want to be a he said / she said. I do have the recording, and am wondering if I should send it to the interested parties.
My ex doesn't know I have the recording.
[–]AllureFX98 points99 points100 points (2 children) | Copy Link
What's crazier to me is she was stupid enough to bring this up before the marriage was licensed. This guy dodged one of the biggest bullets of 2018. He should tread lightly moving forward
[–]dirtysacc[S] 12 points13 points14 points (0 children) | Copy Link
For sure
[–]rebuildingMyself8 points9 points10 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I know right. These days it would be stupid for a woman to even TRY to reason with the husband. Best just go ahead and do it. If she gets caught, there's always divorce-rape to make up for the trauma of being called a slut for acting like one.
[–]rait4e5550 points51 points52 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Jesus Christ the mental gymnastics going on here is crazy. It's just mind blowing that women out there think/act like this is okay.
[–]dirtysacc[S] 28 points29 points30 points (0 children) | Copy Link
They're fucking sociopaths lmao
[–]thy_neighbor32 points33 points34 points (8 children) | Copy Link
There is an update to this story, if you're interested.
[–][deleted] 26 points27 points28 points (4 children) | Copy Link
sounds like he's falling for her bullshit, and his family is helping her feed it to him.
[–]ovrload22 points23 points24 points (1 child) | Copy Link
yeah shes in damage control and using crocodile tears to get him back.
[–][deleted] 7 points8 points9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
'waterworks'
[–]re_all10 points11 points12 points (0 children) | Copy Link
New update; he returned the journal. Essentially said it’s ober cause she never took ownership of what happened.
(Me to the op of the original post)
“Godspeed you lucky bastard, Godspeed!”
[–]ThrowawayGhostGuy13 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I didn’t read it that way.
[–]NoThirst4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
...she's bat-shyte crazy and REALLY into therapy (huge red flag) This guy dodged a bullet... ...no idea however why he is wasting so much time with this crap.
[–]Frogkaboo1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Much thank! It was quite the entertaining read. Very AWALT.
ex finance ups her looks, says sorry, but still externally blames the therapist, quits her job, has a break down, and promises absolute submissiveness to the man if he takes her back... and offers a journal.
The man rejects it all. Good on him.
[–]ArmaniDiamonds0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
He seems to have walked away. Thank god. It's always good news to see brothers dodge a fucking bullet
[–]Morphs_23 points24 points25 points (3 children) | Copy Link
I can only wonder how that recording must sound, how your therapist and ex tried to bring this to you. I mean I can't possibly imagine such a conversation with a licensed therapist taking that ubercuck-position. It's mental.
It's very likely she already cheated, and her therapist probably helped her with some hamstring how it was your fault obviously.
Good job on taking stance immediately, would they have even considered this outcome?
[–]onbakeplatinum11 points12 points13 points (2 children) | Copy Link
She might already be pregnant with Chad's baby and the therapist and her concocted this cuck plan hoping he wouldn't question why the dates didn't line up and yet still be beta Bux becuase they are technically married. Also the looking good was a total manipulation tactic, he should have blown her off right there.
[–]Morphs_3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Well I interpreted it as the therapist being surprised that OP wasn't that much of a monster as his ex made him out to be. I guess the fact that the therapist is a woman doesn't change the fact that she has not clue how women operate.
[–]dmunny441 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
He should've just left when he saw their cars there
[–]TheImpossible126 points27 points28 points (0 children) | Copy Link
AWALT
[–]Pk_s_to_the_yizzle15 points16 points17 points (5 children) | Copy Link
Dude, your sitting on THE BOMB!
What should you do? ONLY THE MOST CHRIS ROCK MIC DROP MOVE OF ALL!!
Take the recordings. Make copies. POST THEM TO FACEBOOK.
With the tagline. "Here is why I am not getting married." Get something to drink and take a listen. Women WILL EAT THE DRAMA UP!
BAM! EVERYTHING CLEAR
Fiance exposed as dog-shit in human form,
Therapist exposed as cancer in human form,
You exposed as DECENT, REASONABLE HUMAN seeking REASONABLE PARTNER.
And let them KILL EACH OTHER.
Let them CHOKE ON THE TRUTH.
while you walk off smiling.
And rest assured, THERE WILL BE NO JUSTICE, But the MEN and the WOMEN will understand.
The men will vocally OR quietly TAKE YOUR SIDE. The WOMEN will say nothing or Quietly take your side.
And THEN they will CHASTISE HER. Not for being a sack of shit,
but they will EXPRESS TO HER, NOT TO BE SUCH AN OBVIOUS AND BOLD SACK OF SHIT. For the next feller.
Either way,
'Nacho Prollem'.
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points (4 children) | Copy Link
I am pretty sure posting a "therapy" session recording while exposing the dog shit would result in some kind of liability action, maybe not HIPPA (since that applies to medical workers, in this case the "therapist") but some other presumption of privacy suit.
[–]Pk_s_to_the_yizzle5 points6 points7 points (3 children) | Copy Link
Hadn't thought about that. BUT.
Did the groom sign any kind of privacy agreement beforehand? Was any kind of notice posted in the therapist office about privacy agreements upon entering?
Some Therapists record their sessions, and their confidentiality is WITH THEM toward the client, not the other way around.
And your forgetting...
It wasn't his therapist. IT WAS HERS.
Is he bound legally in any way?
Also, it doesn't prevent him "revealing the recording to his family in confidence"
If any of this is in doubt, maybe he should take the recording to the lawyer he is already using, and see how much he can dole out.
Bottom line is - HE NEEDS TO PLAY THAT RECORDING (or at least sections of it) SO HE CAN STOP PROTECTING HER FROM HER OWN ACTIONS and put the ONUS of their separation ON HER UN-MARRIAGE LIKE SURPRISE REQUESTS.
All the parents need to see what she is doing, so that he can walk away and they can leave him alone, and stop trying to pair him up with a crazy, and stop guilt-ing him for wanting a good marriage mate.
They are treating him like his decision is irrational, like he overreacted to her deleting his video game save or something.
I honestly don't belive the "you can't submit evidence of a crime because we said "no telling" thing.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
You can have the pants sued off you for doing lots of things pertaining release of information about other people with no implied or granted consent, even though no one signed any agreement guaranteeing privacy. A lot of it is state law, look up two party consent.
Besides which, it is stupid for him to release publicly any of these recorded details, even if it were not illegal or put in civil legal jeopardy, for the simple reason that if she wanted to pursue legal action against him for whatever reason, he would no longer have leverage if he released the recording. With the recording tucked safely out of public eye he can always play the card if he needs to.
[–]Pk_s_to_the_yizzle0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Ok then, let's get back to the meat of the issue.
He should TELL his PARENTS what she wanted and WHY that is not acceptable.
And walk.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I believe that was done in his updates on what happened after if you read them. There was some formal meeting of parents of both her and him, where the discussion happened.
[–]BanMeIMakeNew13 points14 points15 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Therapists are usually pieces of shit. Especially women. I had one so addicted to benzos she could barely hold her head up.
[–]hellrete5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
ALLL, HOLD THE FUCK UP. !!!! How do I put my android phone on record, close the screen and record shit???. The guy shows something really important that I missed like a nuub. Rehearing the conversation!!! Also thy op. Never thought about this.
[–]92JMFL3 points4 points5 points (1 child) | Copy Link
I'd be tempted to stay busy but quiet, let her make up some bullshit to drag your name through the mud then publicly release the recordings on social media to prove she's a manipulative sack of shit who will lie about anything to make herself look good. Her friends and family will realise she's lied to them to cover her ass and she will never be trusted again.
[–]wont_give_no_kreddit1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Recordings are land mines in disgise, he could get countersued. I wouldn't put it past her to try and squeeze as much as she can out of the fallout. It sounds nice if there were no consequenses thou.
[–]douchabag_dan2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
About 99% this is trolling.
[–]PinkEyedGayDragon1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
post the audio
[–]xkqo345lsdh1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
What is wrong with women these days, no fucking shame and they tell themselves anything,
thanks white knight orbiting beta cucks.
[–]Drozz420 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Women are fools. Same thing happened to me, she learned real quick who the doormat really was.
[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points0 points (0 children) | Copy Link
No it didnt, you little cuck
[–]Why_should_I_mayne0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
As soon as I read "therapy", it explained it all. One of the biggest red flags you can find in a woman is that they go to therapy. They are some of the most manipulative sociopathic people you can find. One of the worst fates is to fall for a woman who is mental
[–]fredanderssen0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
What we’re all missing in this is the fact that the therapist did the man a huge favor. Maybe she did it knowingly, or maybe not. But it seems to me that she would have known how a normal man would react, and called him in on purpose before the marriage was to take place. In either case, it was a win-win for the therapist. If she hadn’t called in her client’s fiancé, the marriage could have quickly devolved into divorce as the marriage imploded on the facts of the woman’s proclivities; at least in this case, the determination could be made before marriage. I wouldn’t be too quick to blame the therapist.
[–]yonathanfisher0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Surprised this guy grew a spine and ended the marriage. More evidence that only cucks get married these days.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Tha guys update was even better. I need a kleenex and new pair of shorts after reading how he handled that situation.
[–]SlainFunicle0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Your wife is a lying bitch just type in how to cuck my man and you will see that this was well plan you are a real man for dumping that bitch, i for one don't do relationship anymore fwb or prostitute i don't even want a woman to live with me time has change and relationship with don't make a mistake by hiding the truth you already handle everything like a real man, and if you think you are the first man to encounter this you are making a mistake i bet one of her friend is living this life style so she think she deserve this too, i wish you all the best and i must you played it well by remaining calm and recording everything, don't make her know you have the recording sit on it and see the lies she spread and then exposed her lying ass, and you are now free to fuck some of her friends peace bro and keep strong.
[–]Zombocom19110 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
just one more thing that modern females think we should concede, while they concede nothing at all. "equality" means all new benefits for her, nothing for you
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Well at least she was honest about wanting to hoe out. In other terms, she was saying she didn't love her partner. What AWALTS aren't is honest. They never are, and they plan to manipulate. It's either them or us in that sense.
Not going to justify this THOT. She's a bitch