Gents, today I have for you worldview that will improve your life. Now, one thing we talk about here at TRP a lot is how when a man wants to get better with women, the first thing he has to get over is his fear of rejection. This sentiment has been echoed in self development by the idea of fear of failure. Business leaders are always hammering home the need for getting over your fear of failure, and that your fear of failure ironically ensures you will fail, because you are too crippled by it to do anything. Same goes for fear of rejection. When you don't approach you reject yourself. For some weird reason it hurts less for losers to reject themselves than to be rejected by someone else because they can always rationalize it to themselves that this excuse or that prevented them from tyring, OH BUT IF THEY DID try, then she would have hopped on his dick right then and there. The other side of this fear coin which is rarely mentioned is the desire. Fear and desire are just opposites of each other. Desire is a form of fear and fear is a form of desire. Fear is desiring something not to happen. Desiring is fearing that something wont happen. Have I confused you yet? Lol good.

What you need to know about desire with respect to improving yourself and travelling on the success curve is this: just like how fear of something increase the chance it will happen; desire, specifically the attachment type of desire, reduces the chance it will happen. Think of attachment as a negative force field that blocks out what you want.

Lets look at an example; Man is going to the bar, hasn't gotten laid in a few months. At first he didnt care but today he started to think something was wrong with him for this. He felt a lacking. He felt a neediness to go get laid. In a word, he was attached to getting laid. So he goes out, and as he gets in the bar he is nervously scanning the room for all potential mates. He is tensed. He is shoveling drinks down his throat to try and calm his nerves, knowing that if he can't he's sure to blow it. His friends catch on to how strange he is acting, and they call him "thirsty".

Friend: "Bro why you so thirsty?"
Friends: laugh
Man: ...fml.

And they are right, he has a thirst that he has created for himself. He has a lacking. He needs to get laid. He is attached. He is afraid of the possibility of failure.

No woman on earth is going to be attracted to this guy. No one wants to be around, much less have sex with, a person who is attached and needy.

In to your head pops the phrase "The rich get richer and the poor get poorer." It makes sense here. But it is incomplete. Often the rich do get richer, and the poor poorer, but it has nothing to do with the amounts of there bank accounts. It has to do with their state of mind. The rich generally get richer because they are not attached to money. They are not desperately trying to get money, and as such they are not blowing potential business opportunities. The poor get poorer by the same logic. But, and heres the real diamond, if you were to take a poor man and give him a simple technique to remove his attachment to money, he would stop blowing his money making opportunities. He would seem to "attract" money to him. There is no magic behind this it is just a simple truth of humans. You fuck up what you're attached too because you cannot think and execute clearly. When you don't have the pressure of attachment, it is easy to be smooth, which people reward you for because they want to be around smooth, relaxed people in hopes that they can enjoy a piece of your mental state.

I've said before and I'll say again that its interesting to look at the world as simply a field and manifestation of minds, interacting with each other. All minds want peace and pleasure. Attachment causes suffering and thus repels others. Non-attachment produces peace, bliss, clarity, it improves the mind in nearly every way and therefore it attracts people and thereby people with resources and in conjuction it attracts resources to you. I think a lot of this "the secret" or "law of attraction" bullshit has done more to give people mental problems than anything. Its created delusion, when if you just explained the moving parts involved and take away the "magic" of it then people can actually make sense of it and use it. Basically people want to be around and help out those who are not mentally needy for the help and they want to avoid those who are mentally needy for it.

Ok, so you needy guys out there just want the technique right?

I'd say there are two:

  1. Whatever you want, visualize it and act as though you already have it. This works because you are setting the goal, but since you are acting as though you already have it then you have no neediness. I have had excellent success with this but I view it as a short to medium term fix, good for immediate results but wont transform you at the core. Which is why you can...

  2. Investigate the thing you want and really consider if this is going to be the life changing, end all be all thing you are treating it as. Most likely, you'll get it, you'll feel happy for a bit and then life will be exactly the same as it always has been. What you are trying to do here is even out your mental highs and lows. I feel like attachment basically creates a manic depressive persona, it just depends to the extent it is taken. Manic when you have won, depressive when you lose. Both are actually not as nice as just even contentment and peace.

Anyways what the fuck do I know, I'm some weird pseudo-buddhist on the internet right?

Peace,
SWTDO

TL;DR: Desire and fear are attachment. Fearing something makes your fear more likely to happen. Desiring something repels it. Make goals and then let them go. Either act as though you already have achieved them, or investigate the goal to understand that it cannot really affect your sense of well being. Only your reactions to it can. Stay smooth bros.