To start off, I teach high school, and this is what I tell the boys in my class I've dealt with that seem down because of girls. Not just girls, but all people respect others who are good at things. Try to work on yourself and get really good at something. You'll enjoy becoming good at something and learning, and others (girls included) will respect you for it.

I bring this up, because in my opinion respect is equal to power, and I believe that getting really good at something (mastery) is the highest form of power/respect.

There are different levels of attaining respect. Here I'll describe the levels with examples.

  1. Coercive power / respect. This can be viewed as something along the lines of blackmail or withholding something from someone that they need. This is the absolute lowest form of power. Basically, you are forcing people to respect an item that you hold over them. It usually only applies to one or two people, and they do not like you whatsoever.

  2. Items. This is when you respect someone for having something you don't, that they let you use. I remember being a kid and going over to friends houses to play video games - this is a perfect example of this kind of power. They had games that I didn't, and I respected them for it. This is still a form of power that comes with an object. The problem with this is that they don't respect YOU as a person - just the stuff you have. This is the level of respect millions of teenagers and people get hung up on and spend millions of dollars trying to attain - the coolest watch or iPhone or video game or biggest truck etc. Don't let yourself get caught up on this level of respect.

  3. Legitimate power. This is like your boss, or a police officer. They have a measurable control over your life. In this case, we are forced to respect their position. Legitimate power is a little different because it commands significantly more respect, usually from a large group of people. People work their entire lives to attain this kind of power/ respect.

  4. The last (and in my opinion, highest) form of power is expertise/ mastery. This is why we watch hockey and idolize hockey players. It's why we watch the olympics. It's why we absolutely love Angus Young and Slash and Chris Cornell. It's because they became excellent at something. The cool thing about this is, this is something anyone can do. Everyone can become amazing at something with enough practice. This is what I tell the boys who get hung up on girls. Mastery commands respect from everyone around you, and makes people like you before they even know you. Why did the world mourn when Michael Jackson died? Because it was expertise leaving the world. Not because they knew who he was. With this level of respect, people don't respect an item or position you hold. They respect something no one can take away from you. It's respecting you for your hours or training and practicing and hard work and expertise.

What's really cool about this is, you'll find peace in practice, and in working on something you enjoy. When you respect yourself in this way, others will respect you as well.

So to end, go out and get good at something you enjoy! People will respect you, and you will respect yourself. You'll be overall happier and life will come easier to you if you do.

TL;DR : go get good at something you enjoy. People respect others who are good at something, and you'll respect yourself as well.