I want to address a key habit that will strengthen every man's game both with pickup and platonic conversation alike. Eye contact. Eye contact is absolutely key. Maintaining proper eye contact is the foundation of all conversational engagement.

When you speak to someone (different than when someone is speaking to you, we'll get to that in a minute), you want to make almost constant eye contact. I mean, be totally unwavering. Get used to letting your eyes go out of focus a little bit. Yes. That much eye contact. Do this almost any time you are speaking to someone, especially if your portion of the dialogue at that moment consists of any more than one sentence.

You do not want to stare someone down every time you talk. That is not what I am talking about. There is a fine line between staring and looking away that is solid eye contact, and you have to tread that line. It is scary at first, but once you get used to it and incorporate it into your habitual body language, you will appear a thousand times more alpha, and more importantly, a thousand times more charismatic and credible overall. People will start respecting what you have to say. They will naturally want to interrupt you less, even if you aren't looking at or talking to them.

Don't look at people hard when you speak, unless you have good, specific reason to purposefully intimidate them. Look at their eyes like you would look at a poster on the wall, focused, but easy.

When people speak to you, you want to maintain eye contact, but not necessarily constant eye contact. I have noticed that if someone's eyes leave yours while they are speaking to you and then come back to immediately meet yours, this can make people slightly nervous, not in a creepy way but in an intimidated way; they might even pause to try and remember what they were saying. (This can, however be employed as a killer strategy during any kind of conflict)

You will, at times, come in contact with someone who is as comfortable with eye contact as you are. If they are speaking to you without confrontation, and their eyes do not divert from yours, keep eye contact yourself. This displays equal charisma and credibility. To divert your eyes from a man when he speaks to you can be interpreted as weakness on your own part.

My personal rule of thumb when being spoken to (in non-confrontational, non-pickup situations) is to maintain eye contact until that person breaks it. At that point, you should break it yourself as well, and anticipate (use your peripherals) when the person will look back at you. Once they have come back, wait 2-3seconds or wait until you begin to speak in reply, whichever comes first, then make eye contact again. Wait for them to break eye contact 3-4 times during conversation, then break it yourself that 4th or 5th time for just a couple of seconds. This will keep the listener engaged without making them feel uncomfortable. The nonverbal aspect of the conversation will remain natural and uninhibited, as led by you.

If you are in confrontation (conflict, argument, or debate) with the person you are speaking to, you probably want them to stutter and stammer all over the place; you are right, and they are wrong (hopefully, if you know what you are talking about); you want the frame of the conversation to appear as such. Don't stare them down too terribly hard even still (you don't want to seem like you are ready to slug them unless you actually are), just take out all breaks in eye contact on your part. They will be at a loss for words, because they will be trying too hard not to say the wrong thing; they know that their opponent is poised and ready to rebut.

In pickup situations, maintain eye contact while you speak just as I described it in paragraphs 2-4 of this post, but when the woman speaks to you, instead of maintaining eye contact most of the time with short breaks as I previously described, you want to drop eye contact to almost a nil. To do this properly with a woman implies something different than what it implies with men: not weakness, but aloofness. Look at her eyes just long enough to give her the impression that you are somewhat listening to her, and that is it. You want to keep her questioning in her mind whether or not she is actually getting through to you at all. Then, when you reply, keep that same unwavering eye contact as you did before. To look into a woman's eyes incessantly while she speaks to you is to give the impression of desire on your part. Once she knows you want her, you have lost. This works the same for LTRs, but gauge yourself and your partner in your relationship to know when and how and how often to drop your defenses. This strategy of eye contact in pickup is basically a defense mechanism, use it as such. That being said, don't appear nervous, just preoccupied. Don't just nervously stare at the floor, and don't look in any one place for more than 3-5 seconds. Look at your drink, her drink, a television, your phone, the coasters on the table, the posters on the wall, the napkin canister, her forehead (sparingly), her nails, other people in the area (especially girls) anything remotely worth looking at. Switch it up; make her struggle to keep your attention, and reward her efforts occasionally with 2-3 seconds of eye contact to show you are still there. While not looking at her, do what men do best during a female monologue: "Mmm-hmm...Mmm-hmm..."

If you ever have to pause in search of words (not a deliberate pause for emphasis, which could benefit from keeping eye contact, but a pause out of necessity), break eye contact immediately, as looking into someone's eyes without having something to say constitutes staring right off the bat (staring is creepy). Don't take it too far by looking away like a nervous schoolboy; you don't want to break frame. You want to remain facing them and divert your eyes (to the side,usually). You can also divert your eyes to the forehead to send a subconscious message of superiority. Avoid the mouth and chin altogether; it is a subconscious faux-pas (what's wrong, is there something in my teeth?).

Of course these are all rough guidelines, not hard, fast rules. You will have to figure out what nuances in nonverbal communication suit you best, and then as in anything a true man does, you have to fully own that shit. Consciously, deliberately tailor yourself a set of nonverbal practices, starting with eye contact as a foundation and moving through other gestures such as posture, body position, and last (and also least) hand gestures.

The best way to get started with this is to find a frame of reference in an alpha male role model you look up to and blatantly steal qualities you like from them (you still have to make these gestures your own, completely natural, never contrived or rehearsed). I have included links to a couple of my own body language benefactors.

Bill Clinton. Here is a great example of what you should and should not do in body language. Regardless of what you subscribe to politically (I don't personally agree with everything that Clinton stood for) we all know that Clinton won the hell out of this debate. Everything about his body language, especially eye contact, exudes coolness, confidence, and earnestness, without coming across as overbearing or too intense. Bush, on the other hand, in this video provides us with an example of all the things in a man's body language that can be interpreted as a sign of weakness. He barely makes eye contact with the guest during the first half of his answer, he keeps his body turned to the side most of the time that he speaks, and when he finally does make eye contact, it is a harsh, I-want-to-kill-you-you-bitch death gaze. He would have done better to not answer the question at all. Instead, old Slick Willie left him with that dumbfounded look in his eyes and his jaw on the floor.

Samuel L. Jackson Watch the first minute or so of this one, then fast forward to the 7:00 mark, and let the scene speak for itself.