There's a weakness I haven't yet purged: the climax with another person.

I wasted an evening last night to get laid and receive a blowjob.

Yes you heard me right. It was a waste. Instead of spending an evening doing what I wanted to do I spent it leading up to those activities. During those activities I just wanted to get to the end. Once the end came I had to waste more time playing diplomacy to get out of there and go home.

I'd turn it down nine times out of ten. Why? I prefer doing my own thing. I'm fine with that. I can handle it. I'm happy with it.

So why did I do it? That tenth time. It's like an itch that I can't get rid of. What I hate is it drives me crazy and a few minutes into it I'm satisfied and ready for it to be done. It's the feeling of a body against me upon release that I'm addicted to. I can ignore it mostly but eventually I give in if the opportunity presents itself.

"Just get an escort"

I'm paranoid about getting busted by the police, catching something, getting robbed, or else I would. If there's advice on that I'm all ears.

I know it's biological. My mind and body want a sexual connection. What's the best way to deal, ignore, or handle it?