Advise on Resetting my life

xerxious · 2016-12-13T23:26:42+00:00

I am still new to RP but I can say with complete confidence that you NEVER marry to fix a problem. You obviously need to take care of yourself and there is no way you can do that while taking on the responsibility and challenges of a new marriage. The dynamics are completely different than being single/dating and with all due respect that is kicking your ass.

Actually_Crocodile · 2016-12-13T23:00:09+00:00

This last year has been hell for us because of work overload. I have had several pannic and axiety attacks and no longer want to keep on doing this job. Right now I'm on the longest period without traveling from one city to another (12 days) in the whole year and I'm not home. I don't feel home anywhere.

I think this is your problem here. You're not going to make good, well thought, winning decisions when there's emotional pressure to change the lifestyle that brought you from poor, unwanted, and depressed, to financially stable

Olongapo · 2016-12-14T01:02:04+00:00

Here's a couple of thoughts to consider

1) 50k banked is not much of a cushion....seriously. All it takes is one visit to an emergency room to wipe that out. With that in mind, I recommend building your reserves to "Fuck You" levels. 250k is a nice start. Also, diversify your investments into several no load sector funds and select the "reinvest-my-dividends" option.
2) Do.Not.Get.Married.....yet, if at all if you don't absolutely fucking love yourself and your life. It will not fix anything nor will it give you a sense of home. 3) When you get home, sit down with a piece of paper and map out the next year, the next five years, and where you would like to be in 10 years. This exercise will help clarify your next steps....develop a cost/benefit matrix to your projected activities and use your left brain in your decision making. 4) If anxiety is a debilitating issue for you, then seek out professional help from a psychiatrist who can address the biochemical issues and perhaps engage a therapist who specializes in cognitive behavioral therapy to manage your triggers. This is a medical problem. Deal with it the way you would deal with any other illness. 5) Lift. Work with a trainer and get your ass into a gym a minimum of 3 days per week. Preferably 5. Build a program that combines diet, strength, cardio, and core. Read the sidebars. This will do wonders for your outlook and energy. 6) By all means, finish your degree and get that piece under your belt. 7) Crowdsource your life using this forum. There's a lot of collective wisdom here....in all areas,

Notice, I didn't talk about getting laid. That will evolve organically as you become more centered. The only challenge here that has any meaning is re-gaining control of your own fate and becoming the best man you can be.

Keep us apprised and good luck!!!

Pomandres · 2016-12-14T02:57:42+00:00

I don't feel home anywhere.

Mindfulness & Meditation. Build a home in your dome so wherever you roam will be home.

deadwoodcylon · 2016-12-14T03:42:31+00:00

Take a long break from work (6-12 months) and spend most of that time by yourself (do balance the alone time with social/family connection). Travel somewhere or camp in the woods. The key is to give yourself plenty of time and space to recover, recharge, and reflect on what you've learned so far and what you want to do next.

Never get married.

ChristianRedpill · 2016-12-14T16:16:45+00:00

To be perfectly Frank, I'm not really sure why you are even here. Therapy is beta nonsense. You should know that. Marriage is a HUGE decision that affects the rest of your life, and you seem shockingly flippant about it. You need to get your head together as you are obviously not thinking clearly. You should not make ANY life affecting decisions until you get your head straight. Thank me later.

Brewjo · 2016-12-14T17:42:31+00:00

I know some couples who run businesses together... For the sake of argument call these an average of US$ 2 million per year turn over.

The women the men have are not women who where flaking in and out of their lives, they are the kind of women who join in and as I've seen, literally be processing pay-roll for the company 6 hours after having a Cesarean section.

So if you can't look at her and see that, cut her out of your life.

I'd suggest, before ditching what seems like a good business, find a way to alleviate the overload- if you can find a way to out-source or hire an employee to take even 10 hours of work off your shoulders- such as an assistant to book and manage your travels.

As a boss and founder of the business, you should start to transition out of the shit-kicking grunt work to supervising.

As an example, I worked for a swimming pool construction company, as it grew, my boss stopped doing a lot of the actual construction work and moved towards supervising, once he picked out a leader from the building team, he invested time in getting new contracts and keeping the teams on schedule.

MattyAnon · 2016-12-14T04:39:01+00:00

You can make whatever choices you want in life. You're doing fine. Here, have a cookie. Do you want your head patting too?

is to ask her to marry me

Don't be fucking retarded. If you can get a girlfriend you can get another. Relationships have a time limit, and it ends when you get married or shortly after. Your therapist is fully BP plugged in. Marriage makes no fucking sense at all for men anymore.

Women may love marriage and I don't blame them - they get all the upsides. It's a terrible way to "make it work". Women hate the lack of freedom, don't respect you, exploit you, and ultimately cheat and leave. Fast track to beta bucks. Forget it.

Title	Advise on Resetting my life
Author	cji25
Upvotes	9
Comments	33
Date	December 13, 2016 10:10 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/5i6l46/advise_on_resetting_my_life/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/advise-on-resetting-my-life.65334 https://theredarchive.com/post/65334

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