Vulnerability + conditional male love = ?

HappilyMrs · 2020-06-04T02:09:14+00:00

Are you Christian and do you intend to marry a man who is also Christian? Something that supports me when I feel similarly is that my husband and I both believe marriage is for life except in the event of serial cheating or abuse. We simply don’t believe divorce is acceptable or even really possible (of course it’s legally possible but not spiritually) except in the event of one of these two.

I trust myself not to cheat or abuse. I trust that he won’t cheat or abuse. So there’s only 2 scenarios under which we’d divorce and I trust that neither of them will happen.

We can do other things that will fracture our love. Gain weight, become lazy, fail to be good partners. But we have the time to turn it around because we’re in this together for life. No divorce, only working to improve and love each other better.

This comforts me when I fear losing my husbands love because of my own failings. He’s in this with me for life and he’ll always strive for me. I’ll always strive for him. I believe we’ll find each other in the end.

For those who believe divorce is acceptable under a wide variety of circumstances, I don’t know how they ever feel truly secure in their marriages. From my personal experience, many people who feel this way always have one foot out the door in case things don’t work out. And because they’re not fully committed, they often don’t work out.

MJlove24 · 2020-06-03T21:43:14+00:00

It is what it is. Like you said, no point getting angry at the sun... But as a Christian I believe that only God loves unconditionally (1 Corinthians 13:4-8) and knowing that comforts me in the light of the truths you've mentioned...

throwaway_bluefly · 2020-06-06T03:34:06+00:00

My advice to you would be to wait until you are happy and confident with being you, then that way you'd know that even at your worst, you're still happy with you. Maturity means learning how to cope with the harder things in life in a way that you can be proud of. If you have to feel like you have to be on your best behaviour, then you're not being authentic and that won't last, especially with a partner. You have to get to a place where even at your craziest, you still can be proud of yourself. It comes from having values, confidence and a good sense of humour so that you can laugh at yourself when you do get a little crazy. Being a 1950s Mad Men type housewife is being on your best behaviour, and like Betty in that show, that does drive men away because it feels fake and inauthentic even if it seems perfect. Men like to see the raw, passionate and even ugly side because it makes them feel safe to be themselves too and it makes them take you seriously as a person and not just see you as a robot doll.

Title	Vulnerability + conditional male love = ?
Author	littlesunshine998
Upvotes	12
Comments	10
Date	June 3, 2020 6:06 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/gvz0mo/vulnerability_conditional_male_love/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/vulnerability-conditional-male-love.671528 https://theredarchive.com/post/671528

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