My husband and I have been married for a little over a year now. We are both 23 years old. My husband is extremely extroverted and has a lot of single male friends. I, on the other hand, am more introverted and have many friends who are married and/or have babies.
He constantly hangs out with these friends and for a while was having them spend the night at our house multiple times a week. It turned into a huge argument between us because I didn’t feel comfortable with single men spending the night at our house (he would often stay up really late at night with them, play video games, and would end up sleeping most of the next day since he stayed up so late. We would be lucky to have an actual night together.). Granted, many of these men are believers as well, but I just didn’t feel comfortable having them spend the night - mostly due to the time they took away from seeing my husband. We reached a compromise of one night a month someone could spend the night. My question is: Is this normal in marriage? Do I blame this on him being extroverted and me being introverted, or is this sign of a deeper issue?
I don’t know how to articulate to him that this is just something weird to do in marriage. That reasoning doesn’t connect with him and so I’m just curious as to whether or not this is normal for married couples.
[–]NoFaithInThisSub8 points9 points10 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Sounds like a child marriage (23M, all single male friends, video games into the night, no mission, no frame, no alpha). Flip the script would it really be okay if the female was doing that? no you would dump her straight away. It's common but i don't think this should be normal.
[–]CarelessBowler55 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
My thoughts exactly. Still living like an adolescent. She's rightly frustrated that he's a child. Eventually the sex dries up, and then he'll end up here on RPC.
[–]Deep_Strength7 points8 points9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
The same habits you have before marriage are the ones you take into marriage.
If he was doing that before marriage then she should've expected him to continue doing that after marriage.
It's something that needs to be addressed before marriage ideally because after it's going to be a lot harder.
[–]Wonko_the_Sane775 points6 points7 points (1 child) | Copy Link
This is a good example of why it's better for the man to be older than the woman in a relationship. She married a boy and "feels like his mother" Also they are (very) young newlyweds. They should be all over each other.
[–]agoodcrayon1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I see this all the time. These newlyweds have no idea what they signed up for and mainly got married because that’s what everyone else did.
Major herd mentality in late Millenials and Gen Zers