| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 3 | To the guys reading the sidebar thinking OH NO I CAN'T DO THAT because "that's mean"I need to write a post on how someone with proper sex addiction interprets TRP principles. This post was me about a year ago. TRP put new weapons into the hands of the tyrannical and abusive addict inside of me. Little did I know, everything on RPC etc. is insanely helpful, if *I'm* putting it to use, after I've started a pathway of recovery for my addiction. But sometimes, you don't know what you don't know. | /r/RPChristians | 29/12/21 08:06 PM |
| 17 | To the guys reading the sidebar thinking OH NO I CAN'T DO THAT because "that's mean"My dude, i hear a lot of rage in this post. Even if the perspective is true, your works spill with anger and hatred. Do you long to be more like King Jesus? I'd encourage you to take the points here, the truth you're trying to convey, and consider how Jesus would articulate those truths, and then do your best to patiently calibrate your own thinking to that new model. | /r/RPChristians | 29/12/21 06:26 PM |
| 2 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (12/27/21)OYS #18 (prev. entry) 30yo, 5'7", 150lbs, 15% bf, wife 32yo (married 6yrs), 3 kids (5m, 3f, 0.75m) Physical Have been recovering from surgery since Thanksgiving. No weightlifting until mid-January. Focused on eating healthy (low-carb) maintenance diet. Light physical activity. Recovery seems to be going well. Feeling much better week after week. Mental/Emotional While in the hospital, isolated for multiple weeks, I came to terms with the true depth of my sin related to sexuality. I connected w… | /r/RPChristians | 27/12/21 04:49 PM |
| 1 | Depressed and Anxious Wives: A Slower Approach: Field ReportReally appreciate this post, from a man aiming to keep a family together. I get discouraged when post after post just focus on dudes posting their wins from their DINK lifestyles. I learned a lot. And i have a lot of work to do. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 14/11/21 12:25 PM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - November 09, 2021Gawd I love this forum. You won't get any of that no matter what you do, because you're not entitled to anything from anyone else when you make changes. If you become more attractive and own yourself and develop a true sense of abundance, where you give freely to people who appreciate it without any expectations or strings attached yeah your wife will probably want to do more sex things with you, but she's not obligated to. Yeah, I've been pretending to know this for a long time. I only kinda … | /r/MarriedRedPill | 09/11/21 10:04 PM |
| 1 | MRP is not an identityI think I need that flair. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 09/11/21 06:16 PM |
| 1 | MRP is not an identityThis was what I did with MRP last time around. Used it as a means to stroke my ego. Didn't express lasting change. Didn't improve my life. There were issues deeper in my psyche that I used MRP as an excuse to ignore (and therefore stagnate) instead of actively engaging them and growing. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 09/11/21 06:15 PM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - November 09, 2021OYS #1 Me: 30, 5'7", 152lbs, 15% BF Family: wife 33 (married 6y, together 7y), 3 kids under 6yo. Lifts: OHP 4x110; Squat 4x220; DL 6x275; 7x145 Completed Reading: NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNIFG, TMAP, TWOTSM Currently Reading: Silently Seduced by K. Adams Fitness - Weekly schedule: Lifting 2x, boxing 2x, fitness class 1x Used GZCLP from r/fitness for more than a year. Felt plateu'd and burnt out. Now building a DoggCrapp Training routine. Very different use of my time in the gym, but it leaves my muscles… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 09/11/21 06:09 PM |
| 1 | What would you do or think of the most devout Christian Redditor you have ever met in your life told you that you are not a Christian and do not have salvation? 🤔🤔🤔I think I need to know what you said to elicit that response. | /r/askRPC | 15/11/20 07:31 PM |
| 2 | RPC’s Solution for ‘Dopamine Addiction’Dopamine is the means by which you get addicted to something. I think we miss out on a lot of true, deep spiritual pleasure with God (and people) because our natural faculties like this, which should motivate us to those highest goods, get high jacked by porn, social media, news, TV, etc. to drive us to worthless alternatives. The only cure is to intentionally put time and distance between yourself and these thieves that are robbing you of much deeper pleasures. Get after it, man. | /r/askRPC | 14/11/20 08:30 PM |
| 5 | PSA: Stop thinking about dating non-Christian girls. It’s pointless.WhAt DoEs ThE BiBlE sAy? What gives, Oz? Here and on the podcast. Sex is your god. | /r/RPChristians | 14/11/20 08:25 PM |
| 2 | RPC’s Solution for ‘Dopamine Addiction’RPC doesn't seem to believe in dopamine addiction. Get hot. Read your Bible. Universal Man and Alex Becker's Channel on YouTube will be waaaay more helpful. And why are you on Reddit if you're having dopamine issues? This is one of the drugs. | /r/askRPC | 14/11/20 06:52 PM |
| 1 | Look at what they do, not what they say"Keeping silent" isn't what TRP means by STFU. The Bible never presents it as a means to get into a woman's pants. At TRP, it's a strategy. A failure to STFU isn't poor sexual strategy, it's poor self-control and probably borne out of a failure to truly love the person you're engaging with. | /r/RPChristians | 12/11/20 04:47 PM |
| 11 | A tip on how to unmask the true character of your spouse before marrying herWent on vacation with my Christian girlfriend. Had lots of premarital sex. Married now. Do not recommend. | /r/RPChristians | 12/11/20 04:42 PM |
| 7 | If anyone else needs "proof" about your virgin awalt church girlsThis is a crappy example of AWALT. This is an example of duplicity and fronication. Is she even born again? There are a lot of people in church who are Christian in name only. There's a major church near me where this is the norm. It says more about the "church" than the girls, imo. | /r/RPChristians | 11/11/20 06:28 PM |
| 5 | Root of bitternessBoundaries. Boundaries. Boundaries. Learn how to set boundaries. First clarify for yourself how you would like to be treated (not just in the bedroom, but in everything like how she addresses you). Second, learn how to communicate that to her. Third, be prepared to endure the abuse when she doesn't like being told what to do. There's a book "A Failure of Nerve" by Edwin H. Friedman that discusses the family/organization/nation-shaping power of good leadership, derived from Murray Bowen's "family… | /r/askRPC | 02/11/20 03:37 PM |
| 1 | Confessing sexual sinConfession in the context of "I'm trying anything and everything to surrender to God and repent of this sin that has a hold on my life - and I need your support." Yeah. Good stuff. If it's "I need go confess this sin to you to alleviate my conscience." No bueno. If you're not taking the internal struggle seriously to begin with, don't bother bringing her into it. | /r/askRPC | 02/11/20 01:33 AM |
| 1 | Grieved that wife will never treat me how she treated othersAre you spiritually/emotionally open with her? You can rock RP knowledge all day and pickup everyone except your wife. Here's some non-RP stuff to look into that helped me: 1) Codependency. Are your own emotional processes bound up in the emotional life of another person? In RP speak, this is often referred to as 'being in her frame.' I didn't start to disentangle myself until I found professional help to deal with this. 2) Intimacy Anorexia. Honestly, I think it's a stupid name, but it points t… | /r/RPChristians | 28/10/20 06:49 PM |
| 0 | Look at what they do, not what they sayI will standby my statement. RP is young men learning they're losers, getting their life together, and realizing women like attractive men. RP for married men is basically undoing patterns of codependency, breaking sexual addiction, and getting a gym membership. STFU is baloney. It's a tactic to withhold self-disclosure to manipulate another person's anxiety. It's straight-up abusive. | /r/RPChristians | 26/10/20 03:40 PM |
| 11 | Look at what they do, not what they sayThis whole approach to RP is baloney for married couples in an emotionally healthy relationship. If your wife is straight up lying to you and looking for excuses for a divorce. Zero trust in those words. For 99% of us, you're looking to see if she's saying nice things to assuage you and your fragile ego. "I love you" when she's not passionately banging you? She's trying not to hurt your feelings. Don't listen to those words. "I feel overwhelmed, and you're not even trying!" when you're sitting o… | /r/RPChristians | 23/10/20 03:09 AM |
| 0 | Divorce on the table?I disagree. If someone used porn heavily through their adolescent years, it shaped and distorted their view of women and relationships. Later in life, even if they don't use porn compulsively like they once did, every session reinforces those twisted, malignant neural pathways around relationships. Without a focused effort to unwind that particular brand of damage, I don't think they'll ever establish true affection in their relationship. Just head over to MRP. Tons of men wholeheartedly focused… | /r/RPChristians | 19/10/20 09:25 PM |
| -8 | Divorce on the table?We need to start asking a pretty important, basic question: When's the last time you used pornography or masturbated on your own? | /r/RPChristians | 19/10/20 06:24 PM |
| 2 | How do I handle my mistakes?"Hmmm... I need to work on my timing..." If her brain is engaged with anything you can consider "work," save the butt slap for later, when her mind isn't focused on anything you might call "productive." | /r/askRPC | 18/10/20 03:26 AM |
| 2 | Do any other Christians feel repulsed by the amorality or the main TRP subreddit?Definitely a both-and approach. But I think sexual self-discipline should take logical if not temporal priority. | /r/RPChristians | 15/10/20 07:52 PM |
| 7 | Do any other Christians feel repulsed by the amorality or the main TRP subreddit?I've got a brother who went to the gym daily for 8 years. Super ripped. Stilled addicted to porn. Only God's love is powerful enough to expel a dependence on sexual gratification. Your deadlift stats will never do that. | /r/RPChristians | 15/10/20 07:15 PM |
| 4 | Do any other Christians feel repulsed by the amorality or the main TRP subreddit?I think tier 1 of RPC shouldn't be 'get a gym membership' but 'abstain from all sexual gratification in any form for 60 days (90 days if you've used porn in the past two months).' “All things are lawful for me,” but not all things are helpful. “All things are lawful for me,” but I will not be dominated by anything. -1 Cor. 6:12 | /r/RPChristians | 15/10/20 06:49 PM |
| 4 | Are you guys ok with premarital sex?No. If God hasn't given you a wife yet, head over to r/NoFap. Learn the benefits and power of semen retention. It's incredibly important to master your own sexual self-control *before* you get married. | /r/RPChristians | 15/10/20 06:42 PM |
| 8 | Do any other Christians feel repulsed by the amorality or the main TRP subreddit?Yeah, dude. TRP and MRP are about taking shame-filled codependent men, turning them into narcissists, and finding women to worship them. Some women are so driven by their carnal lust, they suppress the cognitive dissonance of the man's false ego, and they go nuts. Some women can feel the falsehood underneath. Their vaginas want that man but their mind/spirit tells them there's danger and deception. They never get on board with their husbands. Their husbands divorce them, and TRP celebrates their… | /r/RPChristians | 15/10/20 06:37 PM |
| 4 | At a crossroadsAre you even a Christian? That's my first question. | /r/RPChristians | 14/10/20 01:04 AM |
| 1 | Extreme FOMOWanted to post a short note for u/Willow-girl, u/OsmiumZulu, u/redwall92, and u/Deep_Strength. Since these exchanges, in reflecting, praying, etc., I believe the thing I'm feeling is actually the result of a suppressed memory childhood trauma. My mind can't recall what exactly I saw or experienced, but my body sends me extreme danger signs to stay away from it to keep it from happening again. This talk describes accurately what I experienced on the occasions I mentioned: https://youtu.be/3DHi3v3… | /r/askRPC | 12/10/20 08:34 PM |
| 3 | 8 Resolutions for Christian Husbands (fixed)How is #6 not a covert contract? | /r/RPChristians | 12/10/20 10:11 AM |
| 3 | Moving To A New City (A Reflection on 4 Years of TRP)Check out Charisma on Command on YouTube. Try YouNeedABudget software for six months to begin looking at your finances in a new light. Look up the series "Buffets Books" for a good intro and perspective on investing | /r/TheRedPill | 11/10/20 10:02 PM |
| 14 | Question for Married men who have submissive wivesIt's a choice and a response. My wife grew up in a conservative Christian household, going to church and Sunday school every week. She has known since she was a little girl that she wanted to submit to her husband as her head. However, if husband (a.k.a. me) is a loser mc-loserface, submitting isn't always an enjoyable experience. I've gone through quite an incredible spiritual journey these past few months. There might be some FR's to put up in the future. In the meantime, I think my wife's sub… | /r/RPChristians | 08/10/20 04:14 PM |
| 20 | I’m Toxic, But I Don’t Want to Be AnymoreYou'll never conquer PMO until you decide to face the underlying issues you use PMO to hide from. It's true. You're a sinner. You're actually a worse sinner than you even now imagine. But God is also more gracious than you might even now believe. He loves you. Deeply. Just about everyone on here f-ed up their life pretty bad. There is hope. Even for you. Especially for you. Shoot me a PM if you'd like to hear some of the specific practices that have and are helping me break my own habits. | /r/RPChristians | 01/10/20 12:24 AM |
| 2 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (09/30/20)OYS #17 29, 5'7", 155# 16% BF, Wife 31, Married 5yrs, 2 kids, 1 in the oven OHP 2x130#; Deadlift 6x270#; Bench 2x170#; Squat 5x230# Read: NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNIFG, MAP, BOP, RPC Sidebar Fitness & Diet Bulking diet. So much food, it's delicious and exhausting, but putting up PRs in the gym after a loooong COVID valley in my weightlifting progress feels good. Following GZCLP 3x/wk. Love it. I noticed getting out of breath reading stories to my kids. Super embarrassing (though I'm the only one who not… | /r/RPChristians | 30/09/20 08:14 PM |
| 2 | Extreme FOMOSome qualifying questions! Thank you. It's my pet peeve on RPC/MRP that everyone assumes they know what the other means. Fear of not getting the action you want like your neighbor across the street back when you were a virgin? Yes and no. I didn't feel *fear* day-to-day when I wasn't getting any. This experience triggered something else. Something deeper. Fear of not getting blowjobs? Similar to the above. Day-to-day not getting blowjobs didn't cause fear. I didn't think about it. Fear of … | /r/askRPC | 30/09/20 07:50 PM |
| 3 | Extreme FOMOTHIS! This is the kind of context I come here for. I had never thought about it that way. It's ironic though. Our sex life has mostly consisted of discussing what I *want* to do and what she *does not want* to do. It's incongruous. And i suspect that its' incongruous because of all the years i've used porn and masturbation to as a salve for all of my own emotional baggage that's poisoned so many of my relationships - especially my marriage. I have this theory - are you ready? - that TRP is full … | /r/askRPC | 30/09/20 07:24 PM |
| 1 | Extreme FOMOI didn't mean my post to be about blowjobs. I meant for it to be about anxiety. But your point is well taken, and I guess it's time to start a little savings account. | /r/askRPC | 30/09/20 02:55 PM |
| 0 | Extreme FOMOThe red pill told me dread was good for my marriage, though. Where are all the blowjobs? | /r/askRPC | 30/09/20 01:25 PM |
| 1 | Extreme FOMONo worries. I was teasing a bit. As I reflect on this, I wonder if what I'm feeling is closer to something like a demonic manifestation. Hear me out. For a long time, sex has been a competing god in my life. Getting into porn at a young age, I've staked my identity and self-worth on my sexual capacity. However, mixing that up with my Christian faith, I planned on exercising that capacity only within marriage. Yet, this strategy seems to have only destroyed any hope at true emotional, spiritual i… | /r/askRPC | 30/09/20 12:54 AM |
| 1 | Extreme FOMOI'm off reddit for ~40 days and everyone's forgotten me. https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/ibwxwi/comment/g211vee | /r/askRPC | 29/09/20 11:42 PM |
| 1 | Best resource for a Red Pill primer for a guy in a bad marriage?But if he asks for help, I would recommend No More Mr. Nice Guy to start. If it's specifically about his wife, Mindful Attraction Plan can provide some great insight on all the categories to focus on. | /r/askRPC | 31/08/20 11:51 PM |
| 1 | Best resource for a Red Pill primer for a guy in a bad marriage?You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink. Lots of BP men around me. Some of their wives treat them well, some of them don't treat them very well. If he wants help, good for him. Help him. Like someone asking for feedback on their deadlift form. Provide real, honest feedback for his benefit. Most fundamentally, he's going to have to take ownership of his mess, including that 30% BF. And he's gonna have to be a patient stoic while he waits for her to take care of her own mess. Me… | /r/askRPC | 31/08/20 11:50 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - August 18, 2020What do you do? Outside sales. Which is a lot more 'inside' than 'outside' right now. see any problems there? Oh yeah. Tons. One piece I realized after this post was that I've been stimulating myself with pornography, too. Both actual porn and watching some 'Brave New World.' When I do that, I get a neediness FOMO complex. It's total crap. Since this OYS, I've been doubling down to cut out the supply. Cut our the stimulation from these images. They're a distraction from the real world and who I … | /r/MarriedRedPill | 26/08/20 06:33 PM |
| 3 | Own Your Shit Weekly - August 25, 2020OYS #17 29, 5'7", 150# 16% BF, Wife 31, Married 5yrs, 2 kids, 1 in the oven OHP 3x120#; Deadlift 4x270#; Bench 3x155#; Squat 4x210# Read: NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNIFG, MAP, BOP Reading: SGM Fitness & Diet In my diet, I hit my goals by the end of the day. However, I certainly need to do a better job preparing for a nutritious breakfast in the AM. Usually I do overnight oats to ensure I'm fueled up for the first part of the day. This past week, I've quickly downed only a couple of eggs before heading out… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 26/08/20 06:22 PM |
| 4 | Stop Falling Into Women's FramesWhat do you think of this quote: "Whoever asks the questions controls the conversation." | /r/TheRedPill | 20/08/20 11:49 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - August 18, 2020OYS #16 29, 5'7", 150# 16% BF, Wife 31, Married 5yrs, 2 kids, 1 in the oven OHP 4x115#; Deadlift 4x270#; Bench 3x150#; Squat 4x205# Read: NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNIFG, MAP, BOP Fitness & Diet Diet has been balanced and nutritious. Hitting macros, and this past week I have kept at my 3k calories/day. Ratcheting up the lifts has been much easier, but I notice the body fat % creeping up, too. It seems like I just need to put up with it while I push those limits. Mission Prospect effectively for new client… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 18/08/20 08:34 PM |
| 3 | Three Sexy Sex Secrets Every Alpha Must Tryyou're an uptight introverted Eliot Roger autist. Have been that guy. Some days still am that guy. Humor is essential. Jeez I wasted a lot of time being angry. | /r/TheRedPill | 17/08/20 07:43 PM |
| 2 | Baby is on the way!What? Do you base the size of the family you want on the quality of the sex? Sorry kiddos. Would have had a little brother by now, but mom's blowjob skills still need work. | /r/askMRP | 14/08/20 10:46 AM |
| 0 | Baby is on the way!I deserved that. | /r/askMRP | 13/08/20 09:49 PM |
| -1 | Baby is on the way!I'm a dumb dumb. What is "300 game"? | /r/askMRP | 13/08/20 09:49 PM |
| 0 | advice for my brother who has LTR with 3 kids that is about to go sidewaysHow do we know your "horns" aren't really just soft little nubs? | /r/askMRP | 13/08/20 07:06 PM |
| -4 | Baby is on the way!With what? | /r/askMRP | 13/08/20 06:59 PM |
| 2 | Baby is on the way!I always thought the dread levels were covert contracts. I figured I was the only one. Good advice. Previous pregnancies, wife was confused why her friends were way horney all the time and she wasn't. About to find out if it's because her biology is different or because her husband was a loser. | /r/askMRP | 13/08/20 06:58 PM |
| 4 | Baby is on the way!We are all about to find out. Just got the first "Your the worst husband ever" text this morning. Bring it on. | /r/askMRP | 13/08/20 06:56 PM |
| 0 | Baby is on the way!Should-a, would-a, could-a. | /r/askMRP | 13/08/20 06:55 PM |
| 1 | Baby is on the way!She gave me written permission and everything | /r/askMRP | 13/08/20 06:54 PM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - August 04, 2020That last one. Being horny all day and not getting anything. I didn't event realize I was afraid of that. That's the negative emotion I believe I was trying to avoid. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 04/08/20 11:37 PM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - August 04, 2020OYS #15 29yo, 5'7", 150#, 15% BF, Wife 31 (4.5 yrs, together 6), two kids 3 & 1 Lifts: Deadlift 3x265#, Bench 3x145#, Squat 4x200#, OHP 5x105# Reading: MMSLP, MAP, NMMNG, WISNIFG, TWOTSM Fitness & Diet In the gym running GZCLP 3 days/wk. Consistent progression upwards. I'm not sure that my accessory lifts are the most effective combination, but I've decided to stick with my current combination until the end of this 12-week cycle. Tracking calories has been inconsistent. Some days where I don't e… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 04/08/20 09:33 PM |
| 6 | Has anyone here talked about racism?Bruh. This whole thing is dripping with anxiety. A major turn off for women (and everyone else). Do you lift? Stats. | /r/TheRedPill | 01/08/20 12:13 PM |
| 1 | My Wife Asked for Couseling"We don't talk" is easily reversible. It does not mean "dump all your anxieties on me." It means "I want a glimpse of the world through your eyes." I'm always thinking or journaling about some big question. Last night it was, "I think some of the resentment I feel toward you in the past was actually just my own issues that i should have dealt with. I've been trying to be more open and accepting of people and circumstances, and it's really been opening my eyes to new things at work and here at ho… | /r/askMRP | 31/07/20 04:42 PM |
| 3 | I [33M] am 8 months into my MAP and I’m losing attraction & interest for my SO [28F] — looking for some outside opinions.Women are women. As options open up to you, "attractiveness" as a concept is going to evolve. It used to represent the holy grail. Now that you're the sort of man who can get what he wants, it falls down the ladder into the bucket we call "options." It sounds like you refuse to be open and honest with your wife. What are you afraid of? You are strong physically. There's nothing she could do to you physically that would mess you up. In the bedroom, you can go to all kinds of places, and your body… | /r/askMRP | 31/07/20 11:20 AM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - July 28, 2020OYS #14 29yo, 5'7", 15% BF, Wife 31 (married 4.5yrs, together 6yrs), two kids 3m 1f Lifts: Deadlift 3x265#, Bench 4x140#, Squat 4x195#, OHP 6x100# Reading: MMSLP, MAP, NMMNG, WISNIFG, TWOTSM Fitness & Diet Back in the gym three times a week. Diet mostly on point. I've hit my macros 5 of the past 7 days. Usually I'm under-eating not over-eating, which makes it harder to level up in the gym. It took a couple weeks after the gyms opened up, but I'm happy with the way my physique is progressing agai… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 29/07/20 08:25 PM |
| 3 | Divorce and Biblical Dread GameI dont had time tonight to peel back the layers of self-justification you've buried in here. Reading through the websites you've listed, there simply aren't enough numbers to footnote the hermanuetical atrocities the authors commit. | /r/RPChristians | 23/07/20 04:22 AM |
| 3 | Divorce and Biblical Dread GameHow long have you been banging other women? | /r/RPChristians | 23/07/20 04:15 AM |
| 10 | Divorce and Biblical Dread GameStats. We need to have an 'all things are lawful but not all things are beneficial' discussion. | /r/RPChristians | 23/07/20 03:56 AM |
| 18 | Why you should never show emotion in front of a womanThis is dumb. Show emotion. If showing emotion makes you look "weak" that's because you're weak. Hiding your emotion to try to pretend to be something you are not isn't RP or Alpha, it's covert-contract level deceptive. An HVM can feel things deeply. He should feel things deeply. But he should feel them from a place of control and dominance, not from a place of helplessness and weakness. "Now what?" Like when anything goes wrong, it's an opportunity to grow, adjust, and keep moving forward - eve… | /r/TheRedPill | 22/07/20 11:33 PM |
| 2 | Staying humble and RPCI have two prescriptions. 1) Take RP content in doses. Two weeks on, two weeks off. Keep lifting, etc., but tune out from the constant stream of RP material and field reports. If your just starting your grind, think it's most beneficial to come to RPC, get some new information, feedback, direction, and then focus back on your own life solo for a couple weeks again. You right now might not realize that you're still not in your own frame, you're trying to adopt RPC's frame, and you're anxious and … | /r/askRPC | 16/07/20 07:02 PM |
| 1 | Hey guys check out this really neat 3 h YouTube video I watched!Epic. No do a woman. That came out wrong. | /r/RPChristians | 14/07/20 03:17 AM |
| 9 | How I Communicate Now, Without WordsLearn to praise your woman without words. Enjoy the discovery of unique ways to praise her covertly that originate from your own desire to do so. This little comment is so helpful. So often in my journey, my wife has reminded me, "I need your praise/support/etc." But she *thinks* she needs those things expressed verbally. I'll be the first to admit I often express it verbally. It's what everyone out there in the world has told me to do. As I reflect, though, it's clear that the non-verbal forms … | /r/MarriedRedPill | 06/07/20 09:44 PM |
| 1 | Financial Stewarding Tips & TricksIf you think of cryptocurrency in a vacuum, it's risky. I get it. If you put it next to the $6.5t+ the Fed & the Treasure have printed into existence so far this year, the tone changes a little bit. Buying cryptocurrencies might be risky. But you have to also make the case that hanging onto dollars isn't. Listen to a podcast discussing bitcoin then listen to Jerome Powell at a congressional hearing. Then tell me where you'd like to store your wealth. Gold & silver are also good insurance plans. | /r/RPChristians | 06/07/20 02:38 PM |
| 1 | Financial Stewarding Tips & TricksRead Peter Schiff on FDIC insurance. He argues it gives the banks a perverse incentive to make riskier investments with your money. They have no incentive to be careful. FDIC ins. presents a moral hazard for them. Of they lose it all gambling in the stock market, the government will bail them out. Without it, institutions need to be smart and careful. For any institution, dig to find out how the other side of the model works. "What is BlockFi doing with my money that they can give me an 8.6% ret… | /r/RPChristians | 06/07/20 11:35 AM |
| 2 | Financial Stewarding Tips & TricksYes, I think getting at least a little bit into crypto is a good move. Here's an article that resonates with what I see: https://www.publish0x.com/final-sigma-finance/the-no-brainer-backup-plan-using-cryptocurrency-for-gasoline-xjjdgkw There's a new entry point into crypto called stablecoins. An institution like Paxos Trust Company or Gemini will hold $1 in a vault for every 1 digital token they issue into circulation (PAX & GUSD, respectively). Not all stablecoins are created equal. I chose the… | /r/RPChristians | 06/07/20 01:47 AM |
| 5 | Financial Stewarding Tips & TricksI use BlockFi for my savings account. 8.6% APY on USD stablecoins. At Crypto.com you can earn up to 12% APY on USD stablecoins. I used to spend a lot of extra money on stupid things. As soon as I learned there were ways for my money to make more money, it was really easy to say no to that expensive cup of coffee when I see what those few dollars will grow to in a few years, if saved effectively. Turns out any institution relying on the Federal Reserve has no incentive to offer competitive intere… | /r/RPChristians | 06/07/20 01:34 AM |
| 2 | MRP Year 3: Let's Take the Boat Out On the BayI did more good for my wife and kids, and for my parents and others. I have a lot more to give these days, but I'm not referring to money. Some day, I want to give that like crazy, too. I don't think this gets enough airtime for the MRP/TRP newbies. A properly red-pilled man ought to become the pillar of his community. He develops strength, and from that strength he serves those entrusted to his care. Not a covert contract expecting reciprocity but simply giving his best gift (read: TWOTSM). In … | /r/MarriedRedPill | 29/06/20 07:02 PM |
| 3 | How to know if I’m (F) dealing with a narcissist or with someone who has narcissistic traits (who is a bit arrogant & entitled)?There's one key trait I have used to distinguished between true narcissists and generally selfish people: A true narcissist will be emotionally aggressive. For a normal person, when you have a disagreement or differing opinion, if it's serious, it will create distance between the two of you. Friendships are ended, meetups happen with less frequency, etc. With a narcissist, they will not free you but emotionally pursue and entrap you until you see things their way. They will not observe any bound… | /r/RPChristians | 24/06/20 02:57 PM |
| 1 | Thoughts about fraternity/sorority culture?I cannot in good conscience recommend a Christian join a sorority or fraternity, in today's hypersexualized climate. Why? It stands as self-evident that joining Greek life in 21st Century America is at least walking on the line of sexual sin if not secretly pursuing the opportunity. That's why so many of the comments take the otherside of the argument, "It doesn't just have to be about sex and parties." The sinners' side of the argument speaks so loudly for itself, you dont need anyone to mentio… | /r/askRPC | 23/06/20 11:31 PM |
| 6 | Is this normal?My thoughts exactly. Still living like an adolescent. She's rightly frustrated that he's a child. Eventually the sex dries up, and then he'll end up here on RPC. | /r/askRPC | 19/06/20 03:22 AM |
| 16 | Wife is seeking a separationShe is your wife not your accountability partner. The dynamic here is a symptom of your own weak 'frame' (a technical term around this sub). We need to know your height, weight, estimated body fat %, and max lifts (if you know them). Like it or not, physical attraction plays a big role in the health of a marriage. If you want our help in this sub the goal is not simply 'to win her back.' Your goal is to hear fruit in keeping with repentance, finding your own mission in fulfilling the part of the… | /r/RPChristians | 12/06/20 04:02 AM |
| 2 | When do you realize it is the right person?We'd been sneaking around having sex for two months, hiding our relationship from family and church friends, and I kinda realized, "I don't want to give this up." Don't do it the way I did it, but also don't pretend like you won't "burn with passion." | /r/RPChristians | 01/06/20 02:24 PM |
| 1 | What are your views on prenups with Christianity?I would turn it around. What are your views on your state's/country's divorce laws? In hindsight, I might've gotten a prenup. If only because I'm now acutely aware of how badly my wife could ruin my life and my kids lives if she decided to turn on me. My wife and I believe the Bible has a couple key circumstances where divorce is warranted (I know, that's controversial in our Christian circles.) However, we have no exit plan that protects our assets and our kids to our mutual satisfaction if one… | /r/askRPC | 01/06/20 02:22 PM |
| 2 | FR: Potty Train Your ToddlerActually yeah, I think that's a much better analogy. Temporary stewardship partner. 'Til death do us part. | /r/RPChristians | 28/05/20 02:14 AM |
| 3 | How do I stop being a nice guy?Stop smiling. Seriously. When I first started down this path, I suddenly noticed I was smiling a lot in an attempt to make other people feel happy/comfortable. I wasn't smiling as an honest expression of my own emotions but as a means to affect/manipulate other people. So I stopped. I just didn't smile that much anymore. If I ever felt that people-pleasing anxiety creeping in, I would first check, "Am I smiling again when I really shouldn't be?" A super simple step, but it helped me get out of t… | /r/RPChristians | 27/05/20 01:08 PM |
| 3 | FR: Potty Train Your ToddlerThere will come a day when you will have to accept that you didn't marry the woman you think you should have married, you married the woman who you now call your wife. You will discover she has weaknesses and deficiencies. How will you deal with that? She will have a lot of great uniquely feminine strengths, too, and if having been raised in the church will likely come pre-packaged with a huge set of domestic skills. However, everyone has deficiencies and knowledge gaps. In our house, my wife is… | /r/RPChristians | 26/05/20 12:25 AM |
| 0 | Did I do the right thing by blocking this woman?Yeah, block her. Ignore her. Whatever. Let her move on with her life while you move on with yours. Women are more resilient than they let on. She'll be fine. Focus on you, your goals, your responsibilities, whatever good works the Lord has prepared for you. A woman who wants to join you in your work as proper First Officer/helper will enjoy your frame, not put you through all this drama. Yeah, she'll give you fitness tests, but it won't look like what you described. | /r/RPChristians | 23/05/20 04:54 PM |
| 2 | Differences between red/blue for men and women (Drafted for RPCW)Of course I can't speak to what my wife was going through or thinking in either of those seasons. I only know how my own paradigms and habits shifted and how she responded. I have a few paradigm-level Field Reports to discuss what I mean. I'd love to hear your input on them. They'll come out maybe once a week. I don't want to flood this sub with just my content. | /r/RPChristians | 23/05/20 04:44 PM |
| 3 | FR: Potty Train Your ToddlerI absolutely agree, but I have something I've been pondering since I first saw your post. From a Christian perspective, what does it mean to leverage definitions and attitudes developed from divorce? Now, I don't think the end result here is incorrect. I've benefitted from u/Red-Curious's content as much as anybody in this sub. But when we start using the phrase like 'biological stepmother' divorce and broken-families become the standard through which we're interpreting the road back to a health… | /r/RPChristians | 23/05/20 02:36 AM |
| 5 | FR: Potty Train Your ToddlerWow. I never thought I'd be the one giving tips to u/Red-Curious! Anyway, here's a quick overview: Paradigm #1: A child's primary goal is that they are *clean* and *dry.* Using the potty properly is a means to staying clean and dry. Paradigm #2: Using the potty is a routine with a number of steps. The goal is to teach the child the routine, practicing each step at a time. For the below, the child is in pants (or underwear + pants). No diaper. No naked-butt toddlers. This is using one of those ki… | /r/RPChristians | 22/05/20 09:25 PM |
| 7 | Differences between red/blue for men and women (Drafted for RPCW)Very interesting reading through this. I've never really considered what a blue/red pilled woman would be like. As I reflect on my own relationship, it seems very clear that both of us were using RP principles of our respective systems to get what we wanted when we were dating - though sinfully. I was her AF. We met as virgins. I pushed the boundaries until we were sneaking around, having sex all over town. She used her tricks (good sex, good cooking, deep respect and admiration, and setting bou… | /r/RPChristians | 22/05/20 03:15 AM |
| 0 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (05/20/20)You don't know the half of it. | /r/RPChristians | 21/05/20 07:15 PM |
| 0 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (05/20/20)Thanks, man. Something I learned the hard way: If your wife is pregnant or raising kiddos, don't trust advice from any man who hasn't "been there, done that." I wasted a lot of time resenting my wife because she didn't behave like these guys' wives who don't have any kids. It's not your wife's fault kids turned her whole world upside down. The kids themselves bring so much joy it more than offsets the challenges introduced in the bedroom. I use the word "challenges" and not "problems" because I'… | /r/RPChristians | 21/05/20 07:14 PM |
| 0 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (05/20/20)Last night my wife left the house while I was on Zoom with the men from my church community group. She came home with a ladder she found on Facebook marketplace curb alert. Because two weeks ago, I mentioned that I kinda wanted a ladder. She also did the same with some chicken wire for a project that a few weeks ago she was complaining to me about (women, right?). Every single day my wife looks for ways to please me, and I don't have to ask. She does a lot of work to anticipate my every move. Ju… | /r/RPChristians | 21/05/20 02:59 PM |
| -1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (05/20/20)Wow. I forget what it feels like to take advice from Dunning & Krueger. I have a BA in biblical studies. "Try reading for an hour" Try studying the psalms in Hebrew for six months. | /r/RPChristians | 21/05/20 02:39 PM |
| 2 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (05/20/20)This is a debate of active vs. passive dread. And what you call 'assertion' I call negotiated desire. I'm on month 11. How long have you been here? | /r/RPChristians | 21/05/20 01:30 AM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (05/20/20)Lol. "No kids" 30% of the time we'd still bang. 70% of the time she'd feel used, offended, turned off. Now let's hear from someone who's wife is also raising two toddlers as a SAHM. | /r/RPChristians | 21/05/20 01:24 AM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (05/20/20)Explain to me how this *isn't* a covert contract? | /r/RPChristians | 20/05/20 07:07 PM |
| 2 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (05/20/20)maybe I'd find someone else Yeah, As I've tried this sort of thing over the past year, it always backfires. Active dread usually just gives her an occasion to start storing up resentment. It's not worth it. Next time, I recommend a belly laugh. When she threatens withholding sex, one of the best responses is a deep, true belly laugh with, "So you you don't want to have sex?" Playfully teasing her that you both know she likes sex, too. That's the root of RP, women really like sex, but most guys a… | /r/RPChristians | 20/05/20 06:47 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (05/20/20)OYS #13 (last OYS here https://www.reddit.com/r/RPChristians/comments/ecdt5u/oys_where_progress_is_made_121819/fbcp4dx/ ) 28 yo, 5'7", 146#, 15% BF, Wife 31 (married 4yrs), 3yo son, 1yo daughter Lifts: Not sure. Haven't been into a gym since march. Been doing Athlean-X Bodyweight Routine ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vc1E5CfRfos). Muscles still look good. Read: MMSLP, MAP, NMMNG, RPC Sidebar, WISNIFG, TWOTSM Fitness My state closed down gyms back in March. First couple weeks I took fitness s… | /r/RPChristians | 20/05/20 06:39 PM |
| 3 | How do I get my husband to workout and eat healthy?February 2019, it dawned on me that life was headed towards divorce. I found r/deadbedrooms and other blue-pill spots to comiserate with others. Started seeing biblical counselor in Apr 2019. Honestly, not really that useful. I don't know that I would do that again if I could start over. Early June 2019, found TRP & MRP. By the end of the month, I was tracking every calorie, working out, and practicing game. September 2019, hired financial coach/counselor who specializes in helping Christian cou… | /r/askRPC | 18/05/20 01:12 AM |
| 15 | Should we guys listen to our mommas?Yeah. A mother knows what terrible things women are capable of, and she'll help her son navigate those waters wisely. Back when #MeToo was getting off the ground, I remember a group of mothers of boys forming a group to argue that these college girls were mostly embarrassed for their poor decisions and were taking their sons down with them. They were not putting up with any BS. I think a mother can be good at helping avoid the terrors of hypergamy gone wrong. However, I think it still takes the … | /r/RPChristians | 14/05/20 06:55 PM |
| 3 | How do I get my husband to workout and eat healthy?Read enough articles on AWALT. Noticed she looked at other guys in a way she didn't look at me anymore. Realized she could get sexual attention if she wanted it. I wasn't getting any from anyone, even my own wife. She never cheated on me. Very loyal, conservative Christian woman, but sex to her was a chore back then. Now, to say it politely, things are much better. | /r/askRPC | 13/05/20 08:16 PM |
| 2 | How do I get my husband to workout and eat healthy?I started working out when it dawned on me that my wife was hotter than I was. That was a consequence of my lazy lifestyle. Added discipline to my phsyique, diet, work, etc. Now things are good. If your husband is hotter than you, then it sounds like you need to raise that SMV. | /r/askRPC | 13/05/20 02:28 PM |
| 11 | How To Make Money In Economic Booms And BustsEmployee. But sales, so lots of upside potential in commissions. Bought a duplex. Rent covers 80% of the mortgage and we live on the others side. When we move out, we'll see healthy cash flow on this property. But we have some capital investment to make until then. I switched to a self-directed IRA earlier this year. I got tired of having zero options with my money. Last financial advisor picked some funds to dump my cash into and couldn't even explain why beyond "It's what we recommend." Curren… | /r/TheRedPill | 01/05/20 04:08 AM |
| 24 | How To Make Money In Economic Booms And BustsReminds me of the rebel capitalist. Buy low sell high. Most people buy high to try to sell higher. The thing I'm trying to learn is how to discern when something is actually "low." And then being patient. Jeez that's the hard part for me. For those of us just finishing our emergency fund, what assets are useful for building up wealth to get started? | /r/TheRedPill | 01/05/20 03:23 AM |
| 5 | Why I love my husband. Happy to answer any questions about Christian courting as well.It reminds me of my first year of marriage. It wasn't until year three that all the blue-pill tendencies had crept in and taken hold. "He grew his beard for me." -That's the sort of thing that can become the first step in a mans' losing his mental point of origin. Doing something to make one's woman happy when inside he would rather have it the other way. | /r/RPChristians | 29/04/20 07:12 PM |
| 3 | No / Bad Sex - Always His Fault?Are you sexually attractive? Are you hot (not just physically)? My sex life in my marriage didn't improve until after other women started propositioning me. Maybe it's not your fault. But here's the thing: As far as you're concerned, it's your fault. You can't change your wife. You can change you. "Self-development" doesn't really get at what we do around here. | /r/RPChristians | 28/04/20 09:42 PM |
| 1 | Need some advice, long post. And apologize for the scatter brainDo you lift? Wife picked it a new dresser for our son the other day. Two guys loaded it into our minivan for her. I just brought it into the house solo. Read the sidebar. Lift (which might mean a bunch of bodyweight exercises right now). Give it 6 months and see what happens. | /r/RPChristians | 26/04/20 05:41 PM |
| 4 | female destroys male confidenceI have, and it primed me to fail every time! | /r/TheRedPill | 21/04/20 08:06 PM |
| 24 | female destroys male confidenceYeah. That dude was primed for failure the day he needed external validation. | /r/TheRedPill | 19/04/20 12:29 AM |
| 13 | 2 "Redpill" lies and deceptions built to enslave us.Stats? | /r/RPChristians | 06/04/20 11:06 AM |
| 2 | Approaching during social distancing?When everyone is wearing masks, we're not sharing viral particles willy-nilly. You can approach a woman, both of you in masks, she doesnt need to be concerned that just talking to you she's gonna get infected and then pass it onto her immunocompromised grandmother - for example. Positioned, I mean look 2 years down the road at how the world is changing. Understand the impact of $2.5t+ magically proofed into existence overnight. Set up your career and your finances so you'll be in a good spot. We… | /r/askRPC | 04/04/20 05:32 PM |
| 4 | Approaching during social distancing?I just kinda raise my eyebrows at my wife and she takes her clothes off. But more seriously, just hang tight for a couple weeks. Educate yourself on the pandemic situation and economic situation to make sure you're positioned well in the middle of uncertainty. If you're well put together while everyone else is freaking out over the next couple months, women will approach you! And keep working out. I have an at-home bodyweight routine that'll kick your butt. When everyone in public is wearing mas… | /r/askRPC | 04/04/20 04:23 PM |
| 3 | ConfusedCan you provide some context as to the circumstances this was recommended? | /r/RPChristians | 08/03/20 01:08 PM |
| 2 | Witnessing Anima/Animus possession within the evolution of divorceWhat's his mission? Invite him to lift with you. Remember, you cant change his mind about anything for him. If he's not ready to take responsibility for himself, there's a limit to how much "help" you might really offer. | /r/TheRedPill | 04/03/20 10:22 PM |
| 2 | Many Christians believe that the Christian red pill ideas promote an anti-Christian perspective on marriage. What’s your response? What would you say to someone who says that the Christian red pill ideas are too process/result oriented?Stats? | /r/RPChristians | 18/02/20 01:26 PM |
| 11 | Many Christians believe that the Christian red pill ideas promote an anti-Christian perspective on marriage. What’s your response? What would you say to someone who says that the Christian red pill ideas are too process/result oriented?Have you been talking about fight club? More seriously: Can you name something we talk about around here that you think is anti-Christian? I don't think it's helpful to talk about these things in the abstract. The RP world is about getting specific and practical. | /r/RPChristians | 18/02/20 03:31 AM |
| 2 | Pigs and PearlsYeah, I've definitely dumped pearls on people before. Now, I try not to give advice unless specifically asked for it. However, I will work it in as testimony. Especially for those close enough in my life to see how my marriage has transformed in the last year. "My life was like this. Now it's like this. Jesus and the gym have made these impacts in my life." Keep it about me, if they want to hear about me. But I have one friend who I need to grab by the collar and ask, "What the f*** is happening… | /r/RPChristians | 11/02/20 06:10 PM |
| 1 | FR: 1 Cor 7 RevisitedDread? My wife will never know about that experience. I don't intend to tell her, and the people involved I will never see again. You can argue the point until you're blue in the face, but you cannot undue the Scriptural command to husbands as I've isolated it in my OP. If you were married to an unbeliever, someone who never would join you in aligning with God's design for marriage, you as a husband would still be under the commands I've outlined. | /r/RPChristians | 14/01/20 08:36 PM |
| 1 | FR: 1 Cor 7 RevisitedNope. I disagree. Just last night I had a woman who wasn't my wife essentially asking me to come to bed with her. No pressure required. Attraction did all the legwork. A little playful game and my body was all the justification she needed to enter my frame. I didn't sleep with her. It was a real test of a lot of RP principles. FR coming when I've sorted out my reflections. | /r/RPChristians | 14/01/20 07:36 PM |
| 1 | FR: 1 Cor 7 RevisitedThere's no guarantee that she'll sleep with you. The idea is not to focus on her. To focus on yourself. What does sex mean to you? What place does it have in your heart, and how does that play out in your actions and attitude. My guess is most men being pushy still haven't knocked sex off its pedestal. | /r/RPChristians | 14/01/20 06:25 PM |
| 1 | FR: Dinner w/ an AlphaDid you read the article I linked to? The alpha wolf in the wild is the patriarch, caring for and raising his own. | /r/RPChristians | 13/01/20 04:28 PM |
| 4 | LF help with advising married friend (male 45ish) with his 1 year old son and wife (39ish) who is unhappyDoes your friend want any help? Shoot me a PM. I'm a married dude with kids. I have some thoughts. | /r/TheRedPill | 13/01/20 02:44 AM |
| 3 | FR: Dinner w/ an AlphaI think what your referring to is different levels of extraversion in personality. Being alpha is not about being extraverted. Maybe it's trite, but consider the wolf: https://www.artofmanliness.com/articles/how-to-really-be-alpha-like-the-wolf/ | /r/RPChristians | 12/01/20 02:06 PM |
| 1 | Are all relationships that explore sexuality prior to marriage headed towards failure?Did this play a role in your life? Yes and no. Yes, we definitely developed a bond much closer than we would have in a relationship with proper boundaries. No, I always saw our sexual relationship as temporary. It was only after a breakup (part of repenting of sexual sin) that I realized she was also the kind of godly, mature, family-oriented woman I wanted. Despite my own parents' protests leading up to marriage, my whole family sings my wife's praises at every family gathering. She was actuall… | /r/askRPC | 11/01/20 09:47 PM |
| 2 | Are all relationships that explore sexuality prior to marriage headed towards failure?Yes. Here are some of the issues: Shame & Secrecy: We got used to hiding our problems. Though we were both in Christian communities, we kept everything we did under the radar. This created a pattern in our relationship and for each of us personally in suppressing and hiding sin instead of repenting from it. Wise in Our Own Eyes: Because we were having sex and keeping it secret, we sort of got an attitude of "we know what we're doing, we can get away with it, and we'll be okay." Well, we were wro… | /r/askRPC | 11/01/20 09:11 PM |
| 1 | Are all relationships that explore sexuality prior to marriage headed towards failure?My wife and I had sex before marriage. Ask me anything. | /r/askRPC | 11/01/20 07:38 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (01/01/20)I continue to be the disciplinarian. She continues to be the OYS person around the house who actually knows how to pack kids’ school bags & such. I do plenty around the home but, when it comes to the kids, she’s always 7 steps ahead (and adept at inventing/falsifying requirements - eg child X can’t possibly wear that outfit to such & such). Much of it is at her behest & in her frame. When I first started my RP journey, I thought I needed to be the best at everything. However, I unintentionally c… | /r/RPChristians | 03/01/20 03:01 AM |
| 3 | 2 Year Field ReportI have repented of previous sins that I've held onto for decades such as my sexual addiction, my selfishness, my reliance on validation from my wife and my cowardly lack of spiritual leadership. Can you explain a little bit more about this? Specifically, what are the hallmark differences between proper sexual desire and sexual addiction? This is something I personally wrestle with, trying to understand where to draw the line. Also, what did relying on validation from your wife look like? I have … | /r/RPChristians | 03/01/20 02:47 AM |
| 2 | 2 Year Field ReportHe wrote that story here. Sounds like the situation was resolved really well. | /r/RPChristians | 03/01/20 02:45 AM |
| 1 | Do I Have a Covert Contract?1yo girl and 3yo boy | /r/askRPC | 28/12/19 08:31 PM |
| 1 | Do I Have a Covert Contract?That was super helpful. This is all exactly true. I have discovered that the bar is much higher for me than a lot of married guys because my wife is a SAHM with two little kids. When I'm in point, things are good. When I am not, ain't no interest. It's a crucible. But I believe I'm going to be a much better man in the log run by having endured it. | /r/askRPC | 28/12/19 05:08 PM |
| 1 | FR: 1 Cor 7 RevisitedSo, uh, what happens? And are you doing the "Way of the Superior Man" thing, where you experience orgasm without ejaculation? | /r/RPChristians | 28/12/19 02:36 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (12/25/19)Is your woman a Christian, too? Maybe you posted about that elsewhere. Even if you're not married, you could look at Scripture together. Have you read the sidebar material on finding a wife? What you're feeling in evangelizing to your friends has been called "imposter syndrome." It happens to everyone to some extent. The best thing I can recommend is to try to evangelize anyway. Find some reason to meet up, talk about life, and boldly (even awkwardly) bring up spiritual things. It might surprise… | /r/RPChristians | 27/12/19 12:12 PM |
| 1 | FR: 1 Cor 7 RevisitedI recommend starting in an epistle like James. Read a paragraph, passage, or chapter out loud together. Then share your thoughts on what it means and how to apply it to your own life and in your household. Try to avoid asking her "What do you think?" That can put the pressure of teaching/leadership on her, when really that part of discipleship that you can give her as a gift. For the past few months, my wife and I have been going through Psalms. We'll read a Psalm out loud, taking turns every th… | /r/RPChristians | 26/12/19 10:57 PM |
| 1 | FR: 1 Cor 7 RevisitedYou've been here a month. You've made several ridiculous comments on this sub. I don't think i can afford you the benefit of the doubt anymore. Lift. Sidebar. Own your sin. Of course she's sinning. Even in my wife's case, she knows exactly when her denial is an expression of her own sinful heart. The entire point of this post is to get your eyes off of your wife's sin and your wife's failure to hold a proper disposition toward you, her husband. And instead, to put our focus, as husbands, back on… | /r/RPChristians | 26/12/19 09:27 PM |
| 2 | FR: 1 Cor 7 RevisitedTo be clear, I backed off and saw results before discussing anything. Just do it. She will feel the difference. Talk about it after you've woven it into your lifestyle. Test and experiment, then codify it as you look at the Bible together. | /r/RPChristians | 26/12/19 07:57 PM |
| 2 | 18 Years Old. Fresh out of High School. Need Advice.watching a lot of pornography This is one of the biggest gains you can make right now. Stop consuming porn. Stop masturbating as well. If you can't go cold turkey, develop a plan to wean yourself off. When I was in this place, I found it immensely helpful to join r/nofap. Reading content every day about the evils of pornography really helped me say no day after day after day. It's the one community on the internet where it's normal not to watch pornography and masturbate. I also recommend famili… | /r/RPChristians | 26/12/19 02:36 AM |
| 4 | FR: Frame Battles without Frame lead to bad resultsIf you have been foolish, exalting yourself, or if you have been devising evil, put your hand on your mouth. -Proverbs 30:32 A fool's lips walk into a fight, and his mouth invites a beating. -Proverbs 18:6 Hey, u/AlanNoles, that's you. Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble. -Proverbs 21:32 There's a theme here. With his mouth the godless man would destroy his neighbor, but by knowledge the righteous are delivered. -Proverbs 11:9 Are you starting to get the pic… | /r/RPChristians | 24/12/19 03:51 AM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (12/18/19)Good note on scheduling. As I laid down the vision for it, I shared that it's something we're going to try this cycle (she was on her period at the time). Honestly, since giving her space, she seems horny just about every day. This current strategy came our of a lot of prayer and meditation. I expect whatever we do next will likewise come from the same place. The main goal right now: Give her sex she enjoys. She knows it's coming. She looks forward to it before hand. She feels well taken care of… | /r/RPChristians | 20/12/19 05:47 PM |
| 2 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (12/18/19)Pray with the end of discerning which what move you should take next in your mission and goals. Spend time meditating on Scripture, weighing it against the challenges you're facing that day. For example, if I know I'm going to be facing a project or discussion with my wife, it would do me well to consider a verse like Philippians 2:4, considering and praying about how Christ would apply that command to this particular situation. | /r/RPChristians | 19/12/19 09:24 PM |
| 2 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (12/18/19)You're not in your own frame. You would be in your own frame if you stuck do your diet regardless of your household's "temperature." Your wife would not feel listless if she observed you ruthlessly pursuing your mission. At some point, you will have to adopt a no-excuses mindset. Here's a challenge: Every morning, consider all the major things ahead of you, and meditate on what God thinks about those things. Fall into Christ's frame. If you want to get those shirts, place the order by the end of… | /r/RPChristians | 19/12/19 06:17 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (12/18/19)Some notes on STFU. Use it as a response to disrespectful, irritated, or argumentative comments. Don't use it all the time. It's a tool, not a lifestyle. If you find yourself DEERing or otherwise seeking her validation, STFU is a great tool to use. Take your wife on fun dates. Try and fail. Don't sweat it. Watch her response and take it as feedback. The main goal is to have fun. There are museums that are fun to visit. Maybe you have your own attitudes to work on which lead you to believe going … | /r/RPChristians | 19/12/19 06:10 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (12/18/19)OYS #12 (last OYS here) 28 yo, 5'7", 146#, 15% BF, Wife 31 (married 4yrs), 3yo son, 1yo daughter GZCL 3-Day: Bench 3x155#, Squat 5x200#, Deadlift 4x255#, OverheadPress 4x110# Read: MMSLP, MAP, NMMNG, RPC100s, 200s, 300s, WISNIFG, TWOTSM Fitness After Thanksgiving vacation, as I started my new job, it was clear I couldn't fulfill my responsibilities at work, at home, and workout 6x/wk. So I've dropped cardio for the time being, still lifting Mo/We/Fr mornings. So far, I'm still seeing consisten… | /r/RPChristians | 19/12/19 04:25 AM |
| 5 | Maturity mode: Be process oriented and not results orientedI've been thinking about this a lot lately. Just got into the book Atomic Habits that discusses how being goal-oriented doesn't actually help you achieve what you want. One comment: In a competition, both the winners and losers are focused on the same goal; but it's the process the winners followed that helped them acheive victory. I've been so focused on my goal of having sex, that it has been poisoning my whole marriage. The disappointment from missing that goal night after night was just kill… | /r/RPChristians | 16/12/19 12:49 AM |
| 3 | Wondering how men can actually get married these days...Sex generally requires a bunch of trust from women and that's usually the last thing to break through in a marriage. This has been my wife's refrain from the beginning. "We're still building trust." I think I've contributed to the problem by misunderstanding an appropriate context of dread. For a long time, I've thought that dread was based on her idea that I might leave the marriage if she's not up to my expectations. As you can imagine, this only destroyed what little trust we had instead of b… | /r/RPChristians | 09/12/19 02:23 AM |
| 2 | Finding the "one"u/NoFaithInThisSub this sort of thing happened to me. My wife is from a Christian background. She's been a believer her whole life. However, I realized after we got married that she herself doesn't have much of a private devotional life. Her conservative, homes-chooling parents force-fed Scripture down her throat that she never cultivated good habits on her own. Yeah, she should listen to you. But she needs spiritual disciplines that ensure she's self-sustaining. It will save you a lot of troubl… | /r/askRPC | 08/12/19 09:00 PM |
| 3 | Wondering how men can actually get married these days...Do you have any posts about, like, "What the RP field reports don't say"? I too find myself comparing my sexual relationship with my wife to secular counsel, and then I get frustrated when things don't add up. Yesterday, I asked the question, "There are women who sleep with random men no problem, and yet you won't even sleep with your husband. What's the difference?" (Yes, stupid question. In hindsight this was mid-comfort test, which I did pass before the night was over.) Literally, I'm still w… | /r/RPChristians | 08/12/19 08:50 PM |
| 2 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (11/27/19)Pacifier already taken care of. We are pacifier free for the three year old. My wife needed to vent last night. Part of it was, "I think once a week is pretty good!" She looked at me, to waiting for some validation or response. I smiled, STFU, and kinda wrestled her in bed a little bit. Feels like it's best to just focus on my mission and responsibilities and let sex develop naturally. She's also getting on her own self-improvement train. Every afternoon, she complains that she's tired cuz kids … | /r/RPChristians | 30/11/19 07:57 PM |
| 1 | Weekly Date Nights & BedtimeIt's funny how you put "her mission." If ever she asks me something and I tell her, "It's none of your business," she replies, "You *are" my business!" Very helpful stuff. Thanks! | /r/askRPC | 30/11/19 07:49 PM |
| 7 | [Serious Question] What is the proper way to treat a female these days?Step 1: Be vulnerable in your strength. You know the instinct to get up in the night to confront the strange noise in the house, even if it's an axe murdered who's gonna take your head off? You're not RP until you know how to apply that strong vulnerability to relationships, work, and everything in front of you (read Way of the Superior Man for more on that, but be ready to cut through some of the spiritual one-with-the-universe nonsense). Step 2: Start Owning Your Sin. Some of the most absolute… | /r/RPChristians | 30/11/19 01:08 PM |
| 2 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (11/27/19)Go in and update your BF% if you know it as well as what weights you're at for Bench, Deadlift, Squat, and Overhead Press. I didn't understand why those were important when I first started, but honestly those stats provide HUUUUGE context for where things are at. When you hit a certain fitness level, the world changes. Today, my wife was snipping at me in front of the kids and her extended family. I looked her in the eye and said, "That's enough," and she just stopped. No argument later. No noth… | /r/RPChristians | 27/11/19 07:45 PM |
| 3 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (11/27/19)OYS #11 (last OYS here) 28 yo, 5'7", 144#, 14% BF, Wife 31 (married 4yrs), 3yo son, 1yo daughter GZCL 3-Day: Bench 4x145#, Squat 3x190#, Deadlift 3x240#, OverheadPress 5x100# Read: MMSLP, MAP, NMMNG, RPC100s, 200s, 300s, WISNIFG Reading: TWOTSM Fitness Just yesterday morning, I finally rep'd my bodyweight on bench press! I've been looking forward to crossing that threshold for a long, long time. No fanfare. No cheers from the other people in the gym. Just the deep satisfaction of seeing the resu… | /r/RPChristians | 27/11/19 07:42 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (11/20/19)I just realized I posted this too early. I'll copy it over to the OYS that goes up tomorrow. | /r/RPChristians | 27/11/19 03:34 AM |
| 6 | On being a better manDude. Literally. I went from winey and complaining about work ... to having to choose between two 6-figure job offers. And the sex is nice, too. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 25/11/19 08:14 PM |
| 1 | Tips for Utilizing Passive Dread, Isn't It Toothless?Stop trying to DO passive dread. Trying to keep this in mind for myself today. Currently on vacation with the family. It doesn't easily work out for my wife, and I to take the kids to the swimming pool at the same time. Took the 3yo to the pool yesterday. IOIs from everyone (All the other men there are fat, out of shape, the usual.). Part of me is thinking, "Man, you'd get some good sex if you could get her out here with you." But part of me is thinking, "Just chill. She knows. Don't get anxious… | /r/askRPC | 25/11/19 06:28 PM |
| 1 | what the hell is fogging?Done: https://www.reddit.com/r/RPChristians/comments/e1k4hz/fr_phone_repair_wisnifg/ | /r/askRPC | 25/11/19 06:20 PM |
| 1 | Some good news and some questionsI'm currently reading 'Way of the Superior Man" which speaks to this (secular book, dial up the discernment if you wanna read it). A woman operating in her feminine nature will be 'needy.' A man operating in his masculinity will be focused on his mission, having an abundance of emotional resources to share with his woman (instead of him coming to her to feed off her emotional/spiritual energy). I don't know that writing about it will exactly clarify what I mean. You have to experience it. I cert… | /r/askRPC | 25/11/19 04:08 PM |
| 5 | what the hell is fogging?Dude. Read "When I Say No I Feel Guilty." That's where fogging comes from. It will change how you approach every conversation in your life. At home. At work. At church. I got Best Buy to turn a gift card into $100 cash for me, following the principles of that book. Now that I think about it, that would make a good Field Report for the main sub. | /r/askRPC | 24/11/19 02:03 PM |
| 1 | Some good news and some questions"Frame" isn't a persona you wear like a mask and maintain. It's a confidence to enjoy your state of being and project that into the world. You should be completely free and self-assured to follow your deepest inclinations with her. Frame is saying "I love you" because you want to and you don't care how she reacts. Being out of frame is analyzing your situation and weight what BluePillProfessor might say, going with his advice even though your deepest desire is to drop the "I love you" bomb. Say … | /r/askRPC | 24/11/19 01:54 PM |
| 3 | The Importance of Being HappyMan. I have an FR that relates to this very point. I feel like I finally see the intersection between the joy you're describing and the 'frame' of RP. Expect that next week. | /r/RPChristians | 23/11/19 04:13 PM |
| 2 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (11/20/19)On the food. I lost 30lbs over the course of a few months, and I still added sugar to my coffee. The key is knowing exactly how much and recording it along with all your other food intake. I use MyFitnessPal to track calories, paired with a smartwatch to track exercise and steps. You need to establish good eating habits that you like. If you're punishing yourself via your diet, your brain will eventually say, "This sucks. Why do I keep doing this to myself? Gimme summa dat ice cream!" | /r/RPChristians | 22/11/19 12:50 PM |
| 1 | FR: You're Not Hot - YetKeep at it, man! Eventually the scales will tip in your favor. I read on the Strong Lifts blog that you can only build 2lbs of lean muscle mass per month. As long as youre doing the right things to build that muscle, the rest of your body will fall into line. Don't push for too much weight too fast. Program your lifts so that you're pushing your limits without sacrificing your form. Then one day, you will wake up and find a hotdude in the mirror. | /r/RPChristians | 20/11/19 04:40 AM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (11/13/19)marriage counseling Any change with the situation with your wife? My wife and I have been in marriage counseling for the past 6 months with a biblical counselor recommended through our church. At first I was hesitant, but true to form he has rigorously brought the gospel to bear. One word of advice I'd give to myself if I could go back to when we started counseling: "Be not wise in your own eyes ...." - Prov. 3:7a. Be prepared to shut your mouth and open your ears. You'll hear things from your w… | /r/RPChristians | 15/11/19 04:51 PM |
| 4 | Tips on how to Control Sexual DesiresDo you watch porn? Do you masturbate? Controlling sexual desire is kind of an all-or-nothing commitment. Are you lifting weights and exercising regularly? | /r/RPChristians | 14/11/19 11:15 PM |
| 2 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (11/13/19)BF: 22% Turn that into 15%, and a lot of these fights just won't happen. After church, we went grocery shopping (She got upset with me at Walmart because I told her she could not buy a heated pillow (that is not what we came there for) I've seen success with budgeting alongside my wife (we use YNAB). We have a good Captain/First-Officer relationship as we look at what we spent our money on last week and where our money is going this month and next month. In a situation like this, maybe it had … | /r/RPChristians | 13/11/19 05:01 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (11/13/19)OYS #11 (last OYS here) 28 yo, 5'7", 14%BF, Wife 31 (married 4yrs), 3yo son, 1yo daughter GZCL 3-Day: Bench 6x135#, Squat 7x180#, Deadlift 4x235# , OHP 7x90# Read: MMSLP, MAP, NMMNG, RPC100s, 200s, 300s, WISNIFG Reading: Book of Pook Fitness Lifting 3x/wk. I've felt plateau'd for a while. I've increased my food consumption per u/rocknrollchuck's suggestion. GZCL has a combination of low-rep/high-load and high-rep/low-load for the main lifts. I can definitely feel progress doing the lower load … | /r/RPChristians | 13/11/19 04:29 PM |
| 6 | 5 Tips on Becoming More FashionableMy add: tailor all your suits. So many men make the mistake of spending a lot of money on a suit and little-to-no money on the tailoring. I used to sell suits. Little did my customers know, I bought $60 suits at Kohl's and spent $125 in tailoring. One day I'll never forgrt. A customer looked me up and down and said, "I want something like what you're wearing!" I closed him on an $600 suit that afternoon at the fancy clothing store I worked at. | /r/RPChristians | 11/11/19 06:40 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (11/06/19)Yup. Multiple church functions today. After the service this morning, one of my friends wives just wandered over to chat. We've known each other for a long time, but she's never done that in the past. Wife kinda intervened? Seemed like mate guarding. Wife's been sick. I'm taking it easy on initiations. Dread is amping up tho. Everywhere I go, I'm getting from women "Have you lost weight?" and "Do you work out?" I'm sure she sees what they see. | /r/RPChristians | 11/11/19 11:47 AM |
| 2 | FR: You're Not Hot - YetAdded lifts to the original post. House got taken over for a clothing swap. Stuff is temporary pile so we could 'set up shop' in all our other rooms for a day. | /r/RPChristians | 09/11/19 09:01 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (11/06/19)Triathlon Ran 2x 5k's this past summer. Over the next 8-12 weeks, I want to focus on strength while keeping some kind of cardio regime. I think I'll get into swimming & cycling in the new year. If everything looks good, I'll find a short triathlon for next summer. Right now I want to see if the new training regimen yields better results under the barbell. So is she refusing your advances, shutting you down, or are you not initiating? How long has it been going on? Yes, I'm initiating. We have … | /r/RPChristians | 09/11/19 08:23 PM |
| 2 | Should Christian men & women only accept Christian counselStats? | /r/askRPC | 08/11/19 09:34 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (11/06/19)OYS #10 (last OYS here) 28 yo, 5'7", 144#, 14% BF, Wife 31 (married 4yrs), 3yo son, 1yo daughter GZCL 3-Day: Bench 5x135#, Squat 5x185#, Deadlift 5x235#, OverheadPress 5x90# Read: MMSLP, MAP, NMMNG, RPC100s, 200s, 300s, WISNIFG Reading: Book of Pook Fitness Lifting 3x/wk, cardio 3x wk Just started using the GZCL 3-Day system found on r/Fitness. I noticed one component of my stagnation was that the weight was always on the leading edge of my capability, so I never got to work on form at all. GZ… | /r/RPChristians | 07/11/19 04:55 PM |
| 2 | The Truth About PornYeah, if I was given the options 1) have sex with your wife (even "boring" sex), or 2) watch porn and masturbate, I'm choosing option 1 every time. The thing is, I'm caught unawares that option 1 was taken off the table a long time ago without my say-so. Then I'm left with nothing or option 2. Seriously, this past week has been incredible, feeling the anxiety and pressure removed as you mention. | /r/RPChristians | 05/11/19 09:31 PM |
| 2 | The Truth About PornAs we come across marriage-related teachings in our nightly devotions, she's all ears. I think, though, that if I were to just skip to all the sex parts, it would kinda spoil the good thing we have going. | /r/RPChristians | 05/11/19 09:27 PM |
| 1 | The Truth About PornI'm a manager at work. That analogy is super helpful. I know that doesn't work. I've tried. Yes, actually. We have an older couple who's on board to mentor us. She and my wife have been friends for a long, long time. Meetings have been infrequent, though. They just had baby #8! | /r/RPChristians | 05/11/19 02:42 PM |
| 4 | The Truth About PornWord. Thanks! | /r/RPChristians | 05/11/19 12:18 AM |
| 4 | The Truth About Pornchurchianity is always going to make the porn problem out to be worse than it is because it keeps the blame on men rather than looking at the actual dynamic in marriages and what's causing the sexual-break-down. Porn has become an easy scape-goat to avoid figuring out where the problems really exist. This is exactly what I've been trained up in. Everything is the man's fault. In college, as I reflected on my upbringing, I realized that my dad has put my mom on a pedestal on many ways, leaving me… | /r/RPChristians | 04/11/19 11:24 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (10/30/19)To me, that version of dread still feels like covert contract manipulation right now. I'm getting handjobs about once or twice a week. But her vagina is entirely unavailable to me. Not even starfish. She's almost entirely unavailable for general physical affection (but I don't let that stop my kino throughout the day). It doesn't make sense, because we seem to have a very Eph 5 dynamic, except sexually. It's very freeing, since u/Deep_Strength's post, to think, "I'm responsible to be a certain k… | /r/RPChristians | 02/11/19 12:48 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (10/30/19)OYS #9 (last OYS here) 28 yo, 5'7", 144#, 13% BF, Wife 31 (married 4yrs), 3yo son, 1yo daughter 5x5 Strong Lifts: Bench 5x135#, Squat 5x185#, Deadlift 5x235#, OverheadPress 5x85#, Barbell Row 5x120# Read: MMSLP, MAPP< NMMNG, RPC100s, 200s, 300s, WISNIFG Reading: Book of Pook Fitness Lifting 3x/wk and cardio 3x/wk. Switched up to 5x5 Strong Lifts a number of weeks ago. I saw initial gains go way up really quick, but now I'm hitting limits on just about everything. My plateaus have stagnated lon… | /r/RPChristians | 30/10/19 07:37 PM |
| 1 | Encouraging leadership in with non-rp husbandThere was a time when my wife was a bit like this. She dragged me to the gym for a short while. It wasn't until I was fed up that I got gazelle intense (to steal a Dave Ramsey term), found RPC, and started working. "The husband is the head of his wife." A teacher once pointed out to me that it doesn't say 'should be' or 'ought to be.' It says "is." Wives face the conundrum that unless a marital or family initiative is the husband's idea (so to speak, obviously not only the husband/father has goo… | /r/askRPC | 30/10/19 12:49 AM |
| 10 | The goal for Christian husbands whose wives deny them should not be sex but their wife’s repentanceThis is exactly what I needed. I feel like I was being gaslighted. As I'm in prayer, scripture, sermons, etc. I get the impression, "She's sinning against me! This is wrong!" But she puts it in the context, "I'm just not quite there yet." The latter makes it feel like I need to be doing something more to get her there. The former makes it easier to sit back and be patient. How would I respond if it was a different sin? Had she deceived me about something financial? Had she disrespected me in pub… | /r/RPChristians | 30/10/19 12:01 AM |
| 2 | Killing the BlueThis very question has been driving me insane the last week or so. It's one 'flesh,' not one 'spirit,' not one 'household,' or one 'team.' Yeah, I've been working for the past few months to turn my marriage around. But my wife seems to fundamentally believe she's done nothing wrong by withholding sex for so long. Zero percent repentance. And - of course - all of her Christian friends and counselors from church are there to comfort and console her about how hard marriage is. While all the men in … | /r/RPChristians | 29/10/19 02:48 PM |
| 3 | Should I do cardio or go to the gym? Pic inside5x5 Strong Lifts Track everything you eat in MyFitnessPal. The results will take care of themselves. | /r/askTRP | 27/10/19 06:58 PM |
| 1 | I don't think STFU ever fails in my marriageBe better than me. Yeah, I don't have petty arguments anymore. But still a dead bedroom. Last night I messed up. Lost frame. Got butthurt. It's a long road. And no more alcohol. I've noticed I only seem to really mess up after I've had booze. Maybe that wouldn't be a problem if the sex things were napping. But since they're not, a little bit of alcohol screws up all the self-control I need day-to-day. | /r/RPChristians | 27/10/19 10:35 AM |
| 7 | I don't think STFU ever fails in my marriageWhen you get the things done and pursue your priorities, you're making progress. There are some projects around the house that I let languish. When she brought it up (even disrespectfully) my conscience still sang in my ear, "She's right, you know. You futzed around on Reddit instead of fixing that thing." STFU and fix the thing. Get it done. Give her only 100% confidence that you're the sort of man who gets things done. Also, your version of STFU is crap. Stop texting so much. If she's baiting … | /r/RPChristians | 25/10/19 06:37 PM |
| 2 | What is the endgame for redpilled men?Yeah, I've been thinking about that. What happens when you get cancer? What happens if you're in a car wreck leaving you with a disability? Relationships over? Time to die alone? | /r/askTRP | 25/10/19 03:47 AM |
| 2 | Women At Ernst & Young Instructed On How To Dress, Act Nicely Around MenI have to teach both men and women how to dress professionally all the time. | /r/TheRedPill | 24/10/19 08:29 PM |
| 1 | Sub-Communication With The WifeAA. "Oh, good. Can I get the permission slip?" "Any channel I want? Which one is Playboy on these days." Cheeky grin. Eye contact. Let her connect the dots. | /r/askMRP | 24/10/19 06:19 PM |
| 1 | Half ReppingTried this. Improved my squats immensely! | /r/MarriedRedPill | 24/10/19 05:12 PM |
| 65 | A woman is incapable of understanding and accommodating the problem of her man.I was with a group of friends over the weekend. Mixed group, husbands kind of took turns in the conversation at one point sharing their issues and gripes. I didn't. Shut my mouth. Waited for the next subject of conversation. All their wives looked at me a little differently the rest of the day. It definitely sets you apart when you don't seem to have anything to complain about. | /r/TheRedPill | 23/10/19 04:41 PM |
| 2 | Duty Sex Sucks, How to Proceed?I just did 21 days. It was actually really good. Huge mental reset for me. I learned a lot about myself and how deep porn and culture have twisted my own views on sexuality. Back to initiating now. Just when it looked like wife was getting on board, she got her period. She's gotten good at handjobs, though. Like, she knows exactly how to take care of me, and I know exactly how to keep her eyes lit up with some cockiness and AM the whole time. Being 13% BF also helps. I take off my shirt. She see… | /r/askRPC | 20/10/19 12:35 AM |
| 1 | Complete Lifting ResetForm is a big deal. I feel like I've plateued in my squat doing SL5x5. Because the program always has you pushing your limits (especially in squat) there's not much room built into the program to lighten up to focus on form. 5/3/1 provides tons of opportunity to focus on form, but I didn't see much progress. Feels like I wasted some of my noob gains, when SL5x5 would have moved me along faster. | /r/askRPC | 20/10/19 12:22 AM |
| 1 | I Lost the Gift CardYou're right. It's not a big deal. I didn't think it was a big deal. But a number of times in my RP journey i've been wrong about what is and isn't actually a "big deal." Thanks for the tips. | /r/askRPC | 20/10/19 12:06 AM |
| 2 | I Lost the Gift CardYup. I post this to kind of test the waters, to find out if my old BP habits touch even this sort of thing. I planned to ask, "Did you take the gift card from my car." "No..." "Well, I think it got stolen ..." I've messed up in my RP journey enough that I think it's worth digging a little bit to see if I don't know what I don't know. | /r/askRPC | 20/10/19 12:04 AM |
| 5 | Those of you that had LTRs cheat on you, how did you find out, and what were the signs?What if my washboard abs keep drowning out what my gut keeps trying to tell me? | /r/askTRP | 19/10/19 07:42 PM |
| 2 | How to handle Labor / birthStudy up. Leading up to the birth of my first, our clinic gave my wife a bunch of reading materials on the birth process and breastfeeding. I became the resident expert on all those materials. Discussed them with her prior to labor, so I knew everything she was aiming for. When labor set in, she was able to lean on me 100% to take care of her, make her wishes known to the hospital staff, etc. There will be a lot of times in her first few weeks that she's so tired and hormonal she can't think str… | /r/askRPC | 17/10/19 05:09 PM |
| 4 | She's the oneI've done some things that have made it clear that I am very capable of leaving. Wife has legitimate concerns that I will. Mostly from hubris and stupidity of going Rambo. Dread isn't that you'll leave. At least, it's not that simple. Dread is that other women will find you attractive and come make moves on you. (Competition Anxiety) As my SMV has risen, my wife has started to work on hers. She used to pride herself on never wearing makeup. Then one day: "I think I'll try eyeliner on the weekend… | /r/TheRedPill | 16/10/19 12:03 AM |
| 20 | She's the oneIt has been an incredible ride thus far. | /r/TheRedPill | 10/10/19 03:40 AM |
| 1 | Need some advice on how to handle a situation.One key, especially when 'bitchiness' is on the table, is to commit to being the happiest guy in the room. Hell, be the happiest man alive as far as she can tell. Demonstrate that your mood is not affected by her attitude. Don't do this by being dour, angry, or even neutral. Do this by being happy. Do things privately that give you a foundation from which you feel joy. For example, I've got some recent accomplishments from work that I'm really proud of. Thinking about them brings a smile to my f… | /r/askMRP | 10/10/19 03:40 AM |
| 19 | She's the oneIt's already given me a waaaay happier me. | /r/TheRedPill | 10/10/19 03:35 AM |
| 6 | She's the oneI'm curious: What would have had to go differently in your situation to have avoided divorce? | /r/TheRedPill | 10/10/19 03:35 AM |
| 21 | She's the oneStill together. I lost 25 lbs, getting in shape. Women everywhere give me IOIs. Two months into my transformation, all the girls at work suddenly think I'm the most hilarious dude they've ever met. She gets to see the full me. See sees my six pack and all the bad habits I've had over the past years. We've had sex a couple of times, but not anything like the validational sex Rollo talks about. I'm a Christian. I'm committed to Jesus, my marriage, and my principles. I'm hooked on this TRP journey.… | /r/TheRedPill | 10/10/19 03:33 AM |
| 31 | She's the oneLots of friendships. I just stopped taking the time to see my bros. Hobbies like playing my sax & guitar. I instead spent that time doing things with her as a couple. Running and other fitness. Figured I didn't really need to keep working at it since I had gotten married. There are upsides. I had to grow up in a lot of areas in my life, having taken on the responsibility of a wife. But it was foolish of me to put her on a pedestal and make these sacrifices to her vagina. | /r/TheRedPill | 10/10/19 03:29 AM |
| 154 | She's the oneFound TRP 3.5 years into marriage. Definitely traded a lot of things for her that were not worth it. Not at all. | /r/TheRedPill | 09/10/19 06:02 PM |
| 1 | Such trouble with eye contact... it’s like I feel wrong for looking people in the eyes too long like I think subconsciously I don’t want to make people uncomfortable so I can’t look too long.. any advice?The person with the stronger frame will be able to hold a straight face I've always had good eye contact. However, I've also gotten the comment from different people: "You're so hard to read." I've never thought that maybe this is what's happening. Listening, not letting any reaction to their words bubble to the surface. Especially in conversations where the other person is validation-seeking. | /r/askTRP | 09/10/19 04:06 PM |
| 1 | Need some advice on how to handle a situation.I did this too much a couple months ago, and it set my MAP waaaay back. When I left the house, honestly, I was butt hurt or angry. I left the house in 100% the wrong mood. Totally out of frame. If I could go back to old me to give some advice on this, it'd be: In the first months, leave the house for productive/mission purposes only. "I have to go run some errands. I'll be back in a couple hours" (or w/e timeframe is). Make sure the wife/household are all settled first. All your responsbilities … | /r/askMRP | 09/10/19 04:00 PM |
| 4 | How long is too long to wait for sex?Unless you're prepared to become a Christian and ask her dad for his blessing to marry his daughter ... ... move on. | /r/askTRP | 20/09/19 06:25 PM |
| 6 | Help! Stunned by wifeTurn that 20% into 13% and she'll stop being so interested in going out so much. I started this journey at about 20%. When I got to 15%, my wife would just shut up and stare at me when I took my shirt off. Lately wavering between 13% - 14%, with muscle mass building week-to-week. The effect is incredible. It's a lot of power. | /r/RPChristians | 19/09/19 10:22 PM |
| 13 | Cuckold sub has 246k members now, what the fuck is happening ?Yeah, u/surrealismen, I started when I was 12. This summer is the first time I've cut it out 100%. I'm still discovering how much it's messed me up. Nearly 3 months porn free, and my marriage is starting to get better, but I'm also seeing all the ways it screwed me up. | /r/askTRP | 12/09/19 07:36 PM |
| 1 | FR: The Spell is BrokenYou chose "difficult mode" But u/Red-Curious says I'm on easy mode. Which is it!? I think I get it. I signed up for hard mode but played like I was on easy mode. It's no mystery that I woke up earlier this year to find I was losing the game. Seems to lazy to just say "I am addicted to sex" as if that is the issue. Did you read my whole post? It's not simply sex. I used sex as an improper stand-in to feed me with endorphins, dopamine, and spirituality which are better found elsewhere. You nee… | /r/RPChristians | 09/09/19 08:19 PM |
| 1 | FR: The Spell is BrokenHer being mad shouldn't make it easier for you. What makes it harder: Anxiously pretending that something isn't a problem when it is. What makes it easier: Taking it off of my shoulder and onto the table, where we can both shoot at it. one or two of the deep brothers I hope you have Community group leader. Counselor. Select family who need to know (her parents, actually, were the first to take 'my side' when they learned our marriage had issues). I don't talk about these things with hardly any… | /r/RPChristians | 09/09/19 08:14 PM |
| 4 | Is strength training unhealthy?I think it's time for a second opinion. | /r/askRPC | 09/09/19 08:02 PM |
| 4 | Is strength training unhealthy?Arnold Schwarzenegger is 72 years old. You'll be fine. | /r/askRPC | 09/09/19 07:58 PM |
| -1 | FR: The Spell is BrokenMy point of origin I think. "I want to say this." "But she won't like that." "I don't care. Say it anyway." Pandora's box is open. Instead of worrying whether she's mad at me, I'm confident that she is, and it makes me feel so much freer. Autistic? Probably. Stupid? Absolutely. But there's a deep issue I'm no longer hiding. It's on the table, and I feel like I can finally take the next step forward, come hell or high water. The risk is amplified by the church culture we're in. It's a tight knit … | /r/RPChristians | 09/09/19 07:15 PM |
| -2 | FR: The Spell is BrokenGuys. I started WWIII. You can read about it in my next OYS. Here we go. Ironically, as soon as I did, all of my anxiety about this melted away. Frame came back immediately. What the heck? | /r/RPChristians | 09/09/19 05:27 PM |
| 1 | FR: The Spell is BrokenDidn't know there's a such thing as overdoing dread? In all my OYS posts, feedback was that dread was too low. Do you sidebar? Yeah, I have my MAP & Dread Levels planned out in my Google Calendar. I've read the books. I know how it's *supposed* to work. | /r/RPChristians | 09/09/19 05:24 PM |
| 1 | FR: The Spell is BrokenPlan forward is to lift more. Sidebar more. Pray more. Mission more. And reach out to a friend I've been praying for, who just rematerialized on Facebook. Answer to prayer that I have a means to contact him. Next on my mission is to meet with him in person. | /r/RPChristians | 09/09/19 03:47 PM |
| 0 | FR: The Spell is BrokenTo unleash the beast. Have the argument we've been putting off for years. | /r/RPChristians | 09/09/19 03:06 PM |
| 1 | FR: The Spell is BrokenWow. That article is intense! I feel cheated. I'm pissed. Would it be a big mistake to send it to my wife? | /r/RPChristians | 09/09/19 02:53 PM |
| 1 | FR: The Spell is BrokenAnyway, as far as ideas for you, have you tried any comfort strategies? Not in this case. She's playing the victim card hard: "I feel used. I'm not an object. I am not a piece of meat." In the past, I would have succumbed to this and reasoned with her out of neediness. Right now, I'm pretty committed to riding it out. The spell is broken, the neediness is gone. Have you gotten to the root of why she doesn’t want sex? I don't think so. We've been seeing a biblical counselor for the past few month… | /r/RPChristians | 09/09/19 01:32 PM |
| 2 | Is confidence really the most important trait when it comes to attracting women?Not 'no one.' Disney Channel | /r/askTRP | 06/09/19 11:24 AM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (09/04/19)Time alone for prayer is key for me. Glad you had a chance to sneak away. Do you been using Amused Mastery for fitness tests? | /r/RPChristians | 06/09/19 11:09 AM |
| 1 | Low value menSo is diminishing approach anxiety a sign of rising in value? | /r/askTRP | 05/09/19 02:47 PM |
| 1 | That Girl at WorkYup. All those. She and I will be meeting with a client today. Arm-touching expected and laughing at my "jokes." She usually finds something to discuss so she can walk with me back to my office afterward. I have to lay down the, "You'll have to excuse me, I have work to do" before she leaves me alone. | /r/askRPC | 05/09/19 10:24 AM |
| 1 | That Girl at WorkSo, u/OsmiumZulu, what's the alternative? Passive dread is happening at home, even without my prompting. A while ago, talking about sex, chatting about how I'm reserving all of it for her instead of secretly using porn and masturbation, I said to my wife, "And if I go too long, I feel like I need to take matters into my own hands... (long pause) wait, do you know what I mean by that?" Her, "Yeah, you'll sleep with other women!" What!? "That's not what I mean, and you know it." Changed topic. | /r/askRPC | 04/09/19 09:47 PM |
| 2 | That Girl at WorkIn my case, being alone in private can be avoided. When I was still stumbling around MRP, not RPC, I was alone with her in a room. I had her follow me there so we could discuss something. Yeah, we discussed it, but the sexual tension was insane. Didn't do anything. Left the space. Both went back to work. But it felt like I uncovered power I didn't know I had. I've always been a gamer/nerd/loser with an extroverted personality. This was different, and my conscience bids me not to do it again. | /r/askRPC | 04/09/19 09:43 PM |
| 2 | That Girl at Workturn her into an orbiter I've never had orbiters before. I don't know what to do or how to feel. I had a super-fit dude tell me, "It's all in your head." I told him, "You've been fit and attractive your whole life. You have no idea what I'm talking about because you've always lived it." Now I'm in it for the first time. I've found this chapter from WOTSM to be especially helpful for these situations: That is helpful. Thank you. There still isn't sexual intimacy at home for me. Not intercourse … | /r/askRPC | 04/09/19 09:40 PM |
| 1 | That Girl at Workyour perception isn’t correct. Maybe. I didn't date at all in HS. Dated a little in College. Never sexually promiscuous until I met my now wife. I don't have a to of experience with the HB scale, except ignoring it. I'm the head of my department. I wear a tailored suit to work. That plus noticeable increased fitness has hypergamy working for me every day. Colleagues, clients, whatever. I could charm the pants off these people, but I charm them into signing my contracts instead. your perception… | /r/askRPC | 04/09/19 09:31 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (09/04/19)I absolutely positively do not know what I want. I can’t figure it out. At all. My whole life has been a string of decisions to avoid things I don’t want instead of doing what I DO want. I reflected back on all the plans I’ve made going back to 16 years old and not a single one of them has worked out the way I wanted, or even close to the way I expected it to. Maybe that’s life, but maybe I’m terrible at making plans? I identify with this really hardcore. Earlier this summer, I discovered that s… | /r/RPChristians | 04/09/19 09:23 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (09/04/19)OYS #8 (last OYS here) Stats: 28yo, 5'8", 143lbs, 14% BF, Wife 31 (married 4yrs), 3yo son, 1yo daughter 5/3/1 for Beginners: Bench 11x105lbs, Squat 6x140lbs, Deadlift 14x165lbs, Overhead Press 8x70lbs Read: MMSLP, MAP, NMMNG, RPC100s, RPC200s, WISNIFG Reading: Book of Pook, Proverbs, Hebrews Bible Study & Prayer: 8 Daily time alone in the word & prayer, still going through Proverbs. Missed a few days of family devotions at the dinner table, still going through Hebrews. Almost every night devot… | /r/RPChristians | 04/09/19 09:11 PM |
| 1 | How to hate masturbation/ eliminate sex driveAre your working out? 3x a week in the gym minimum. | /r/askTRP | 04/09/19 12:30 PM |
| 2 | Being mysterious and she says "Why is it that you won't tell me anything about yourself?"Amused Mastery: "You wouldn't believe me if I did!" Smirk. Wink. Whatever. | /r/askTRP | 03/09/19 07:08 PM |
| 25 | Stuck in my head?How's your eye contact? When you bought that six pack, did you look the cashier in the eye? Did you maintain eye contact until they looked away first? Start with eye contact in all your day-to-day activities. Don't look away to think of something to say. Maintain eye contact and say whatever's on your mind. This is the alpha confidence of a three-year-old boy (I have one. I see it every day.). You are a three-year-old in the confidence department. Start there and grow up. | /r/askTRP | 02/09/19 08:16 PM |
| 2 | What do you guys make of this situation?I'm a noob around here. Only a few months in. My advice probably sucks. Here ya go: Sounds like, based on your last 3 pts, if you're actually in your frame you don't want to fire your First Officer over this. All things being equal, it seems to me you'd rather keep her than not. You've come here to ask us to convince you otherwise. You want to sacrifice your frame for ours? Ask her if she wants to be your FO. If she says yes, bring her to CO? Move to CA? Idk & idc. Set strong boundaries, tell he… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 02/09/19 08:10 PM |
| 2 | Is it ok to go out to bars a few times/week and socialize?Going to a bar isn't sinful. Drunkenness is sinful. | /r/askRPC | 31/08/19 08:39 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (08/28/19)Cool on pt 2. On pt 1, I feel similarly. It's hard to measure progress, but it's easy to measure failure. At least for me, if I lose frame, everything feels "off" for the moment. The way I've been measuring frame is like measuring a round of golf, counting each time it's lost. The lower the score the better. I don't keep a daily tally, but I can basically guage from day-to-day if things are getting better or worse. | /r/RPChristians | 30/08/19 03:02 AM |
| 1 | In finding a wife it’s appropriate to approach with man-to-woman subtleties. Especially, if there’s limited time to develop a relationship through community.Seems like this belongs in r/askRPC | /r/RPChristians | 29/08/19 04:14 AM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (08/28/19)What about frame makes it so hard to measure, do you think? When she gives you starfish, are you full of disappointment or are you enjoying yourself regardless? | /r/RPChristians | 29/08/19 04:12 AM |
| 2 | Struggling in my faithThere have been many times when I identify with the dude in Mark 9:24: "I believe, help my unbelief!" A man shared with me earlier this summer some really key advice: Read the Bible and pray, every day, and if you ask God for nothing else, ask him to fill you with the Spirit - every day. Faith is a gift. There is no magic incantation to activate it. However, you can position yourself to be a ready recipient of God's grace. I recommend "Habits of Grace" by David Mathis to explore that more deeply… | /r/askRPC | 29/08/19 04:06 AM |
| 2 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (08/28/19)Thanks. It feels like a lot of progress. 4 Yr wedding anniversary is tomorrow. FR or two next week. I promised at least one to u/Red-Curious. I edited my post to take my max weight and reps from this past week. | /r/RPChristians | 29/08/19 02:01 AM |
| 1 | Separating the sexes in churchTo be fair, Islam isn't as "uncucked' as you might think: https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/ctlyj9/trp_and_the_middle_east/ | /r/askRPC | 28/08/19 08:44 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (08/28/19)It’s a simple as “don’t sit down”. That is super helpful. Running will sabotage that goal. I actually take a lot of pride and satisfaction in running. Growing up I had asthma. In college and high school, I suffered a series of pneumothoraces. I've never viewed myself as capable of real athletic achievement. Right now, running is how I can "prove myself wrong," so to speak. I'm registered to run another 5k at the end of October. Going into the winter months, I'll change up the cardio to somethi… | /r/RPChristians | 28/08/19 07:33 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (08/28/19)Nothing says DLV to a woman quite like seeing her man's soft, round chubby face softly lit by a glowing phone screen. Try picking up a Bible instead, I bet she won't try ripping that out of your hands! I don't know. Reading that again, it doesn't seem like DLV to me. I think a simple, "Hey! What's really going on?" could have gone a long way. | /r/RPChristians | 28/08/19 07:18 PM |
| 3 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (08/28/19)Switch that fogging to some Negative Inquiry. I would guess something deeper is actually bothering her and causing anxiety, but it'll take some work to dig all the way down to it. | /r/RPChristians | 28/08/19 06:51 PM |
| 2 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (08/28/19)Squats are definitely still miserable, but I think now that I'm using a weight under my short leg, the issue is just a weak back Where do you feel your weight on your feet? For a good squat, it should bee in the middle of your foot or a little bit in the heel. If you feel like you want to stand on your toes, you're leaning too far forward and probably curving your back. I always focus on getting my chest up and out to help me keep my back straight so I don't use and hurt my lower-back muscles. M… | /r/RPChristians | 28/08/19 06:47 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (08/28/19)over something relatively small Are you sure it's relatively small? Or have you decided it's small? she really got mad at me and started arguing with me. I tried Fogging but she just wasn’t having it. I don't know your wife as well as you do, but I wonder if she's looking to the captain to provide a real solution and he's ignoring her instead of steering the ship. | /r/RPChristians | 28/08/19 06:27 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (08/28/19)That makes more sense. That 205lbs would be a lot different if you were only 5'7", for example. | /r/RPChristians | 28/08/19 06:24 PM |
| 2 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (08/28/19)Bruh, post all your stats. Come on. | /r/RPChristians | 28/08/19 05:06 PM |
| 2 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (08/28/19)OYS #7 (last OYS here) Background/Stats 28yo, 5'8", 144lbs, 14% BF, Married 4 Yrs, 3yo son, 11mo daughter. RP Date June 18, 2019. Read: MMSLP, MAP, NMMNG, RCP100s Reading: RPC200s, WISNIFG, Proverbs, Hebrews, Philippians Squat 6x140lbs, Bench 8x105lbs, Deadlift 8x165lbs, OH Press 4x75lbs Bible Study & Prayer: 10 Spending time in the Word and prayer every morning for the past 2.5 weeks, currently in Proverbs. Leading my family through a chapter at the dinner table after we eat every day, curr… | /r/RPChristians | 28/08/19 03:59 PM |
| 1 | Continue to pursue dating or not?Lots of other great comments here, I don't have much: Don't panic. Even if finding the right man takes another five years, you'll be okay. | /r/askRPC | 28/08/19 02:56 PM |
| 2 | First argument in a whilewe see readily that we are not the men we thought we were This. Right here. As I've experienced this summer, finding your frame (more specifically, finding your frame in Christ) begins with an identity crisis. One has to realize he doesn't really know himself and then start the long journey to discover who he actually is. Heads up: You might not like that guy when you first meet him. You see all the sin you've let build and build for God knows how long. Get in the Word. Spend time in prayer. Go … | /r/askRPC | 28/08/19 02:50 PM |
| 1 | On Frame: Punishing Your WifeAs I reflect, it was definitely a fitness test. When I got back, she was putty in my hands. Respectful, following my leadership, deferring to me for how the family was going to spend our Saturday. The reason I posted is because of how unnecessary my attitude was. As a fitness test, the right response then was to STFU and go work on something. The 'work on something' in this case was my run. However, I spoiled it like I mentioned in the post. There are some other, bigger things going on in my mar… | /r/askRPC | 28/08/19 02:43 PM |
| 1 | First argument in a whileAs you'll find throughout RPC, the best solution is to become the man that you're happy with - not sometimes but all the time. | /r/askRPC | 27/08/19 04:31 PM |
| 2 | Ok, I'll bite: To confess my cheating or not?Is that the case, u/Finuul? I believe that if it's something that needs to be confessed, the Spirit won't let him let it go. Every prayer, every moment in Scripture, maybe every sermon, the conviction will haunt him until it's put to rest properly. Obviously, if it didn't bother his conscience, he probably wouldn't have posted here to begin with. | /r/askRPC | 27/08/19 04:28 PM |
| 2 | First argument in a whileI know she knows something is wrong but I just can’t pop out of the blue and be like “I am mad because our sex life sucks So, uh, I did exactly that. There was one night when I was literally in my wife's face shouting, "I want sex! Do you understand!?" Yeah, it didn't do me any favors that night or even for the next few days. But it was a moment of intense honesty. It came 100% from my own frame. And by God's grace we still slept in the same bed that night. As I look back, there are a couple of … | /r/askRPC | 27/08/19 04:19 PM |
| 4 | First argument in a whileA couple of things I notice (besides your lack of stats in the post): Competition Don't compete with your wife. Unless you have clearly defined boundaries for a game and losing the game won't mean losing frame, losing face, or losing your temper, don't view your wife as a competitor. Instead, for these kinds of circumstances, establish leadership, "Hun, I'm going to go ahead and leave now. Please don't waste any time and head out as soon as you're ready. If you get there first, I'd like you to g… | /r/askRPC | 27/08/19 02:14 PM |
| 3 | Ok, I'll bite: To confess my cheating or not?... And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. (James 5:15b–16a ESV) This is the verse I come to for circumstances like this. I have sinned - against God and against someone else - but the someone else might not know. In my life, I have taken this passage to demonstrate the power of confessing sins to other believers. It doesn't here say "if you have sinned against them confess to them" but just… | /r/askRPC | 27/08/19 01:27 PM |
| 4 | Looking for advice, Need help. +Apology.In MMSLP, Athol Kaye recommends it by a 'say it at the same time on the count of 3' kind of thing so she's honest under the pressure. But like I said, long-term it seems like calibration to her man is the way to go. Her response to his desire sets the agenda. That's what I'm working on these days, 4 years into marriage. | /r/RPChristians | 15/08/19 09:23 PM |
| 3 | Looking for advice, Need help. +Apology.Just ask: How frequently do you want to have sex once you get married? I wish I had asked. Would have really helped clarify expectations. But as you'll hear from others, a woman will calibrate her sexual interest to her man's desire, if she finds him attractive/desirable enough. | /r/RPChristians | 15/08/19 08:28 PM |
| 1 | Audio: Matt & Lauren ChandlerIt's like the female version of this: https://youtu.be/tAxPwHXi4PM | /r/RPChristians | 14/08/19 06:03 PM |
| 3 | Opinions: Do you ask a woman out to begin dating?Yes. Take initiative. Take the lead. Define the relationship, set your boundaries. Follow through on establishing what you want from the relationship. Otherwise she will, and you'll one day wake up to find you're bound up in her frame because you failed to manifest yours early on. | /r/RPChristians | 13/08/19 01:43 PM |
| 19 | [FR] Straight from the horses mouth 😱My wife out loud: "I want to feel like we're partners." Me in my brain: "You want a strong, attractive, valuable man to follow - and I'm not it yet." Me out loud: "Yeehaw pard'ner." All this RP stuff? It works. It's like a miracle drug. | /r/RPChristians | 12/08/19 05:04 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (08/07/19)I think that's true. Since starting the RP journey, my mission fluctuated between 'have sex' and 'get swole.' I was careful in the email to be clear to avoid the prostitute thing. My message was more of a repentance from how I have hidden my true desires from her and then lived in resentment when nothing happened (which contributed to attitudes in me which wrecked other aspects of our marriage and household). The message here was that I won't be doing that anymore. I'll be making my desires clea… | /r/RPChristians | 09/08/19 09:18 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (08/07/19)I don't know any "babies" who devour books. How old is this kid? | /r/RPChristians | 09/08/19 07:39 PM |
| 2 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (08/07/19)I told my wife I won’t play WoW and that I would rather play a live poker game every now and then. This sort of thing has been a major game changer for me. First, to tune into what I want or don't want. Second, to clearly communicate that. Third, to withstand any objections/anxiety that come my way (read: WISNIFG). Good step. | /r/RPChristians | 09/08/19 06:36 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (08/07/19)baby, who steadfastly refuses to stop crying when I tell her no. I don't understand how you think this is supposed to work. | /r/RPChristians | 09/08/19 06:33 PM |
| 1 | Career beta looking for tips on maintaining frame, without anger, during early transformationI know you're serious. I don't think you know how early in my MAP I am still. Rambo would try some choking right now. I'm going to wait until sex and IOI's replace her evening Facebook binge. | /r/askMRP | 09/08/19 04:40 PM |
| 1 | Career beta looking for tips on maintaining frame, without anger, during early transformationBrilliant. Genius. I never would have thought of that. | /r/askMRP | 09/08/19 04:35 PM |
| 1 | Feedback on mission / hobbyReplace it with more sidebar reading! | /r/askMRP | 09/08/19 04:31 PM |
| 3 | Feedback on mission / hobbyYou sound like a nice guy. Don't be a nice guy. Assert yourself and move on. Someone else can be scout master for a while. The community will appreciate having another real, unanxious man who knows what he's about. | /r/askMRP | 09/08/19 04:30 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (08/07/19)OYS#6 (last OYS here) 28 yo, wife31, 3yo son, 11 mo daughter. Together 5 yrs, married 4 yrs. RP Date: June 18, 2019. 5'8", 143#, 14% BF E1RMs: Dead 218#; Squat 166#; Overhead Press 93#; Bench 126# Read: MMSLP, MAP, NMMNG, RPC 100s Reading: RPC 200s, WISNIFG Physical Lifting 3x week. Following 5/3/1 for beginners. Learned better DL form, allowing me to lift much heavier. Friend helped me learn how to squat all the way to the ground. Ironically, finishing all the assistance work is the hardest p… | /r/RPChristians | 09/08/19 04:25 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - August 06, 2019lower IQ portion of the population I belong to. Don't get stuck on this. Too many people decide that they're not smart enough instead of putting in the effort to find out what they can & cannot be intellectually. Because you put this in here, I'm gonna recommend you hit up Khan Academy. Whatever are you think you're not smart in, start plugging away at classes. For instance, I've never been good at math. I just decided I was a "people person" not a "math person." Well, I start Khan Academy's Fou… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 09/08/19 03:36 PM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - August 06, 2019Get down to 15% BF. Life starts to change completely at that level. People will start calling you "sir" instead of "hey you." Where are your stats? Deadlifts, bench, squat, and overhead press? You got your wife a gym membership? That's cute. Don't let her come to the gym with you (unless you want to show her Chad's 6-pack so she can imagine how much fun having sex with him might be). The gym is for you. Over the next six months you will do and become things that you never thought you could do an… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 09/08/19 03:20 PM |
| 1 | Career beta looking for tips on maintaining frame, without anger, during early transformationHaving sex with her right now would be a major slip back into her frame. Or it's an opportunity to practice bringing her into your frame. Even if you don't bring her in 100%, getting to 40% would be better than your previous 0%. Be better than you were yesterday, even in the bedroom. My dead bedroom is making progress. We're not properly fucking right now either, but with the activities we do in bed, I'm taking the lead, getting her used to following directions, touching her more aggressively (i… | /r/askMRP | 09/08/19 03:12 PM |
| 2 | Career beta looking for tips on maintaining frame, without anger, during early transformationHere are some things I've found helpful for frame: When she throws a curveball your way, literally ask yourself, "Would doing what she wants cause me to lose frame?" If the answer is a "yes" or "maybe," then don't do that thing. (Credit to Richard Cooper for this tip.) Remember your goals are your undercover project. Every time you reveal to her your strategy in the chess game you are putting her in charge of the outcomes. Eye contact. Make it a practice in every conversation with your wife (or … | /r/askMRP | 09/08/19 03:02 PM |
| 2 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (08/07/19)I would agree that you shouldn't be so polite to your wife. Certainly, don't be a jerk 24/7, but be aware when "being polite" is actually "worrying about she thinks of me." The former is good but the latter will start to create distance between the two of you. | /r/RPChristians | 07/08/19 07:58 PM |
| 1 | Stupid situationYou are clearly the child in this story. | /r/TheRedPill | 07/08/19 05:19 PM |
| 2 | On the importance of frame and dread gameI don't want sex from my wife. Why are you wasting your time? You just want a little ego boost or do you want an incredible marriage? None of this makes any sense. | /r/TheRedPill | 06/08/19 09:04 PM |
| 0 | Managing & protecting money in a relationship / marriage (real talk on personal finance)Beta. Bucks. I don't think "success" is his problem. | /r/TheRedPill | 06/08/19 08:56 PM |
| 3 | On the importance of frame and dread gameAnd the sex? Is that what you wanted from your wife? A good talk? | /r/TheRedPill | 06/08/19 04:20 PM |
| 3 | I was labeled a misogynist because I said that I preferred someone who was conscious about modestyYup. My wife grew up in a Christian household where both parents taught their daughters to dress modestly. She likes to push it a little now. I occasionally have to enforce boundaries when she's a bit too revealing. She usually responds with a fitness test and then changes if I pass it. I think too that we get stuck thinking that one can on be "modest" in how they dress. Modesty also applied to speech, attitude, possessions, etc. As you said, the wardrobe is just an expression of what's inside. | /r/RPChristians | 03/08/19 01:45 PM |
| 2 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (07/31/19)Incredible advice. Thank you. Do any scriptures come to mind that you might recommend? | /r/RPChristians | 02/08/19 03:58 PM |
| 4 | The Main EventThe secular version is arbitrarily rooted in oneself. The Christian one rooted in one's identity in Christ. The secular one has nothing more than one's own character to be built on. And if that character isn't so hot, that frame might not be that much fun, I can imagine. Christ's is better. | /r/RPChristians | 01/08/19 09:21 PM |
| 2 | The Main EventThis was incredibly enlightening. Thank you. My 'main event' in my last OYS was clearly not really a main event. It was significant. It was a 'breakthrough' in some ways for me personally (realizing just how deep the sin runs for me personally and in my marriage), but it didn't get to this level. I have a long way to go. A long, long way. Also, I really appreciate RPC's take on frame. It's consistent with things I've always known/felt as a Christian. Trying MRP/TRP's version of frame felt mean a… | /r/RPChristians | 01/08/19 07:56 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (07/31/19)That prioritizing of my goals is super helpful. Thank you. I really appreciate having that outside perspective. I believe I am a born-again Christian. When I was 17 yo, my life was radically transformed. I pursued pastoral ministry for many years, getting a 4-year degree in Biblical & Theological Studies (no, I haven't kept up my Greek & Hebrew since those days). Definitely need to lead by example in devotions and scripture memory. Not to pharisaically masquerade psuedo-holiness around the house… | /r/RPChristians | 01/08/19 06:54 PM |
| 1 | OYS - Where Progress is Made (07/31/19)OYS #5 First time OYS on RPC. Previously I was on MRP. 28 yo, wife 31, 3yo son, 10mo daughter. Together 5 yrs, married 4 yrs.RP Date: June 18, 2019 Read: MMSLP, MAP, NMMNG Reading: RPC 100s, WISNIFG Physical Height 5'8" - Weight 144.5# - BF 14.5%Dead Lift 145#, Overhead Press 75#, Bench Press 105#, Squat 145#. To note: I've lost 25# in the last two months. Maybe that's too much too fast. I don't know. I feel great and I look great compared to old me. None of my clothes fit anymore. I'll intent… | /r/RPChristians | 31/07/19 04:24 PM |
| 4 | Wife prohibiting me from DJing in bar of my choiceYou mentioned the side bar? Pick up "When I Say No I Feel Guilty" and down it ASAP. Lots of useful bits in there. Fogging, negative assertion, and negative inquiry have been hugely useful for me. If nothing else, as she tries to rope you into her anxiety (read: emotional hurricane), you can keep your cool. As I tell my 2yo son when his 10mo sister is crying: "Just because she's crying doesn't mean you have to be sad, too." Do the gig. Definitely do the gig. You'll have "won" if in the in-person … | /r/askMRP | 29/07/19 08:30 PM |
| 1 | Household FinancesBe attractive. Got it. | /r/RPChristians | 29/07/19 05:45 PM |
| 1 | Household FinancesThe conundrum is that overall my wife is good with handling money. The budget is in perfect order. I just feel treated like a child. Instead of addressing that head on, I've been employing covert contract after covert contract to try to see things change (a la NMMNG). | /r/RPChristians | 29/07/19 05:44 PM |
| 2 | Household FinancesUpdate/Field Report To satisfy u/OsmiumZulu's note, here are my stats: 5'8", 144#, 28 yo, wife 31, married ~4 years, together 5. 2yo son, 10 mo daughter. RP Date June 18, 2019 Dead Lift 145#, Overhead Press 75#, Bench 105#, Squat 145# (been doing whole body routine I kind of made up, starting 3/5/1 for beginners this week) I did not move any money around. I did not send any emails. Last night was much more interesting than that. Things were off from the get-go. From my initial post, you can all … | /r/RPChristians | 29/07/19 02:12 PM |
| 1 | Household FinancesI needed exactly this. | /r/RPChristians | 29/07/19 11:07 AM |
| 1 | Comebacks & One-UpsmanshipThis is incredibly helpful. I grew up with 3 brothers, so banter was only ever 'competition' not 'play.' As the eldest brother, I learned how to win. In my marriage, that's really screwing me over. | /r/askMRP | 28/07/19 09:21 PM |
| 13 | Comebacks & One-UpsmanshipEnded up replacing it. Jeez the accountability is on point around here. | /r/askMRP | 28/07/19 11:42 AM |
| 2 | I feel like a child. Starting againMe too. So many covert contracts. Sex. Finances. Parenting. Everything. Classic Nice-Guy Syndrome over here. It's absurd and embarrassing. I've been initiating every day. Getting rejected almost every day. A couple of handjobs thrown in there, but the bedroom hasn't been properly revived. I'm basically one month in. I've lost a ton of weight. The wife notices the new muscles. I'm getting IOI's everywhere I go. All the assertive methods from WISNIFG are working wonders in all kinds of areas of my… | /r/askMRP | 26/07/19 07:02 PM |
| 2 | 116 - God is a jerk.At first, badly. I got home, started playing with the kids as I usually do, and she immediately brought up finances and a purchase decision I made that she didn't agree with. As she berated me, I laid out for her that I was not going to be spoken to this way moving forward, and that I would be taking over primary responsibility to the finances. She got angry. Real angry. I used fogging, negative assertion, and negative inquiry to get through it and maintain frame. It worked really well. As we ha… | /r/RPChristians | 26/07/19 11:15 AM |
| 1 | Are wives a gift?Maybe. Maybe not. At the end of the day, I'm the gift to her. Fit body, strong frame, firm direction, and decisive leadership. I'd like her to reciprocate, in her own feminine ways. That would be a gift. | /r/RPChristians | 25/07/19 06:49 PM |
| 6 | 116 - God is a jerk.This was good to hear. I'm staring down the barrel of a tough conversation tonight. I'm taking back control of our family budget. I've done the "nice" thing and abdicated my leadership of our family's finances to my wife. After three years, she treats me like a child with an allowance, even though I'm the sole breadwinner. Tonight, I will inform her that's changing. She's not going to like it. She might throw a fit. But underneath, I know it's the right move for my family. It's the right move fo… | /r/RPChristians | 25/07/19 06:47 PM |
| 2 | I feel like a child. Starting againHead over to r/RPChristians. | /r/askMRP | 25/07/19 01:08 PM |
| 1 | Frame & HappinessAnd here I thought I had toned the unicorns down already. See how far I have to go? | /r/askMRP | 25/07/19 02:42 AM |
| 2 | Fat man wants to know how light he needs to get to start jogging again?Get BMI down to 26. Download a Couch to 5k app. Go nuts. | /r/askMRP | 24/07/19 07:49 PM |
| 1 | Frame & HappinessI read something similar years ago in "A Failure of Nerve" by Edwin Friedman. As a single, I found that pretty easy to do. After getting married, I've grown more and more codependent without even realizing it. Thank you. This quote is fantastic. | /r/askMRP | 24/07/19 05:18 PM |
| 11 | From purple pill married to fully red pill: My Journey"4 Years" That's helpful to hear for guys like me who are closer to just 4 weeks. I'm still wrestling with the 'no love' piece. I know it's true, but I still don't want it to be true. I try to do all this thinking in the gym, under a barbell, where the harsh realities of life are easier to swallow. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 24/07/19 04:19 PM |
| 2 | Don't talk about fight clubI've had some TRP-related conversations with friends. I don't ever use the term 'red pill,' but discuss things like SMV, lifting, the hamster, working on yourself, etc.. Test the waters with some of the principles. Let them know I'm testing them myself, trying something new as a man that I've never tried before. Maybe there's be one or two that I introduce to this sub. Right now, nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. | /r/askMRP | 24/07/19 03:57 PM |
| 2 | Do you ever talk about the hierarchy? Or is this something you should never do?I don't know if it's that simple. On the surface she wants me to talk. But when I have, there's a bit of disappointment in her eyes that I fell for it. It's always obvious to me that she wishes I hadn't given in. | /r/askMRP | 24/07/19 01:21 PM |
| 2 | Do you ever talk about the hierarchy? Or is this something you should never do?I told my wife about it when I first found MRP. "You'll have to look up to me..." "You will in some sense be below me ..." All bullshit. It didn't affect her, phase her, or change her. Just lift. I'm in charge now, 90% of the time anyway. She sees my muscles, feels my frame (though imperfect it is), and she's compliant and submissive with how we live our lives. I personally have a long way until this translates to the bedroom. But still. Lesson learned. You don't talk about fight club, because t… | /r/askMRP | 24/07/19 03:41 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - July 16, 2019I'm about a month into MRP. Still no sex. Passing probably only 30% of the shit tests that come my way. Is it too early to deny check-in time in the face of denials? How do you advise working that dynamic this early on? | /r/MarriedRedPill | 17/07/19 08:49 PM |
| 2 | Today I realized I'm a simpGo to the gym. Lift. It's amazing how much smaller these things seem when you've properly exhausted your muscles. | /r/TheRedPill | 17/07/19 05:05 PM |
| 1 | Need Advice: Marriage CounselingI'll take it | /r/MarriedRedPill | 11/07/19 04:15 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - July 09, 2019You're right. I could have gone for it. And I didn't. I settled. My wife had told me that she doesn't "feel safe" with me to have sex. She's said this off and on as our sex life dwindled. Having been a former alpha who slid into beta after marriage, she's totally right. I have not enforced boundaries or done any of those things that create that sense of safety for women. I don't know how to be effectively assertive with my sexuality. WISNIFG had already opened my eyes to a lot of that. Her actio… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 09/07/19 05:25 PM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - July 09, 2019OYS #4 28, wife 31, married 2.5, together 3.5. Kids: 2.5yo boy & 9mo girl. Fitness Been hitting the gym 3x a week and hitting the trails to train for a 5k 3x a week. It's obvious to me that a lot of the sexual frustration I thought I felt before MRP was really just physical frustration. I was not moving enough, lifting enough, and my body was crying out for some action. I foolishly thought all of that action needed to be sex and so pestered my wife about it all the time. Just four weeks later,… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 09/07/19 03:26 PM |
| 3 | The Red Pill Will Replace ReligionNot if 'God' has been used as a stand-in for the unconscious biological impulses upon which TRP philosophy is also built. Same story, different vocabulary. Personifying versus systematizing. | /r/TheRedPill | 09/07/19 02:33 PM |
| 4 | Own Your Shit Weekly - July 02, 2019OYS #3 28, wife 31, married 2.5 yrs, together 3.5 yrs. Kids 2 yo boy and 9 mo girl. Reading Complete: MMSLP Reading: MAP Physical/Health 155 lbs, 16.9% BF. Target is 140lb/s, ~12% BF Been running and lifting. Running a Couch-to-5k program, Tu/Th/Sa Lifting We (Arms/Shoulders), Fr (Core, Back), Su (Legs) My posture and tone are already improving. I can see and feel that I'm slimming down. Wife takes notice from time-to-time, but hasn't directly said anything. Best part is, when I say, "I'm go… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 02/07/19 05:04 PM |
| 4 | Own Your Shit Weekly - June 25, 2019OYS #2 Stats First day at the gym is tomorrow. I'll have numbers next week. Study Still reading through MMSLP. Also watching Rollo's YouTube channel when reading isn't an option. Audio-only for my commutes. Diet I've established a good pattern. No specific tracking, but 1000% better than what I was doing: Breakfast: 2-egg omlette and fruit (oranges, strawberries, or grapes). I'll brew coffee if the 9mo daughter didn't sleep through the night at all. Lunch: Work has a complimentary cafeteria.… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 25/06/19 01:23 PM |
| 5 | Your woman is one of your greatest creationsIn the beginnings of my MRP journey, I'm shocked at how well my wife responds to me when I treat her that way. It seems so backwards, but it works. No sex yet, but the passionate kissing is back. I just keep telling myself the same things: Be Alpha. Don't be a beta cuck. STFU. IDGAF. And it's working. Gym membership opens tomorrow. I'm stoked. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 19/06/19 10:05 PM |
| 28 | Your woman is one of your greatest creationsThis whole post hit home. I needed it. Thank you. The feminine grows with praise. The masculine grows with challenge. Totally. This more than anything is becoming more and more apparent at my house. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 19/06/19 08:40 PM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - June 18, 2019OYS #1 I just got here. This is my first post. I discovered this sub on Friday, June 14th. I've lurked on some TRP groups in the past, but MRP has been the first formal education I've gotten. It's so far been the kick in the ass I needed. r/DeadBedrooms was not actually helping me. Diet Past Friday, had pasta for lunch and pasta for dinner. I crashed hard. Got mopey, depressed, and feeling sorry for myself. It was a low point, and I knew it was time to change. That's when I discovered this sub… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 18/06/19 07:21 PM |
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