It doesn't matter who it is--a coworker, a "friend", stranger, even my own mother--I've noticed that the amount of confusion/anger/sadness I feel is almost directly related to the amount of time I spend with women. I have recently understood this about myself and it's not pleasant.
I recently was feeling very gloomy. I couldn't pinpoint why because everything is going okay for me. Then I realized that I had been spending almost ALL my free time with female friends, in person and on the phone. I came to the conclusion that I've been absorbing female qualities and that is why I have felt so strange. This has been happening to me, quite subconscious, for years and I finally get it. Without being apart of male spaces, even if they're just online, I am subject to feeling "caught in the net" of femininity. I need to work on this.
A part of me wishes that this wasn't how I interpreted the world, but then I realize how much I've been lied to about female nature. I look back at my life and how I've catered to women in more than one ways with no return...and how the greatest stimulation and love I've felt has been between male comrades.
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