Red pill red flags

Aurore11 · 2020-07-17T10:59:52+00:00

I would say the best giveaway is if he's using red pill techniques on you. It's highly unlikely he'll admit to being a red piller, or even that he'll use the lingo in front of you, but the whole point of wanting to avoid a red piller is to avoid his behavior in a relationship, so: pay attention to his behavior!

Great news is that FDS makes you see through that even without knowing about the red pill - in fact, it makes you see even through men who don't know about red pill or PUA but are just generally being LVM in the following ways:

Dread game it's probably the main thing that encompasses most others. It's when he makes you always worry that you'll lose him. Some may go so far to openly state they might cheat on you, others may flirt with other women in front of you, or they may just disappear for the night and when you're finally able to reach them, they don't wanna answer your questions about where they were, etc.
"Agree and amplify" this isn't inherently a red pill strategy but they do it to women. Example: you tell him you don't like the fact he's flirting with other women, he says "not only am I flirting, but I also have a harem". They use it to reduce any conflict to absurdity, because their goal is not to solve problems, but to simply dominate the conversation.
Dismissal of your concerns - the previous 2 things may be seen as a part of this too. They see any concern or any criticism coming from a woman as a "shit test" and they think the only way to pass a shit test is to "display dominance" by brushing it off, no matter what it is.
Always keeps you questioning his commitment - he threatens to break up, you can't reach him, lets you believe he's ok with seeing other women on the side if you "misbehave" etc. This is very similar to dread game, but it's more general, you just constantly have a feeling he may leave.
Asks about your sexual history if he wants a serious relationship - not all men who do it are red pillers and maybe they don't always mean something bad when they ask it, but it could be another warning sign.
Plays hot/cold games - again not something only these men do, and isn't necessarily bad in initial stages of getting to know each other, but if it extends that, it might be an issue.
And just in general - you catch yourself wondering how to get him to commit, how to please him while HE COULDN'T CARE LESS about making you happy, you invest a lot more energy in the relationship than he does, it's not uncommon for him to ignore you, he's being aloof in conversations with you, condescending, he's gaslighting you, making you apologize for being mad at him even if you were mad for some bad thing he did, blaming you for his actions, even lying, he feels no remorse when his actions hurt you - but gives you crumbs of affection or, if he went really too far in his "dread game", even goes for grand gestures... but soon things go back to how they were. And I said "went too far in dread game" and not "messed up" because the only way these men think they mess up is when they fall in love or don't act like a**holes. Treating you poorly is only a mistake in their eyes if it sobers you up and makes you dump him - otherwise it's a feature, not a bug.
Edit: another red flag I forgot to mention: Negging - giving negative opinions about you, or insults barely disguised as a compliment (for example "you look good for your weight" - especially insidious if you aren't even objectively overweight). You can sense that it's not just teasing by the way it will feel more like him laughing at you, not with you. Try to "neg" him back and see how he reacts - he probably won't snap at you but he'll try really really hard to one up you, or he may get aloof or start any form of dread game in order to "keep his frame" i.e. dominance over you. The point of negging is to crush your self-esteem, to make you feel like you aren't special and desirable in his eyes. Again, as with other stuff, I understand some women may be intrigued. Like "oh my, who is this man who dares to see me as nothing special, I've had men shower me with attention, how can't he see what they saw?" While this is a bit naive, it's not the main issue. The main issue is that this man genuinely interprets that as proof that you, along with all women, are inferior and that's why you "like being treated as inferior". Nevermind that men fall for the exact same thing from women, lol. Either way, if he criticizes you to the point where you doubt yourself, or gives you backhanded compliments, chances are he's a red piller (and even if he isn't, it's a sick relationship pattern, leave anyway).

If anyone knows any other stuff, please add.

And lastly, not all women have an equal chance to end up with one. If you're a 35yo business owner, there's almost no chance a red piller will want you (unless he's much older than you). If you are 20-25 and not very professionally ambitious, there's a much bigger chance he'd want you.

Ultimately I'd add that the issue isn't just in the fact he's, for instance, flirting with other women in front of you. The truly sinister part is that they do it because they think women are evil, mentally inferior, irrational and almost "less human" so to speak - while also being masochists who love being treated poorly and subjugated to a man. We shouldn't want such a man even if he treats us well.

And when women fall for them, they see it as a confirmation of their sociopathic views. They use the behavior explained above to hook you because people get more hooked when they must "solve a riddle" and work hard for something they like. They don't know or ignore the fact that men also fall for women who do that stuff. Also, the less self-respect and self-love the person has, the more likely they are to fall for red pill techniques.

That's why the best way to avoid them is to work on yourself, in that case the toxic concoction they have to offer won't be registered as your "language of love", and will only repel you if anything.

Aurore11 · 2020-07-17T07:34:53+00:00

[deleted]

painmakesyoustronger · 2020-07-17T14:52:58+00:00

This list is fantastic, and I upvoted it when I originally saw it.

Triangulation (which is in the list above, in so many words) is a big one. Triangulation with how busy they are, with exes, with work, with friends, with addictions.

It’s all a ploy to make you feel less worthy and work harder for them so that they can stop putting in the effort they once did which was never natural for them and impossible to maintain (not because of your lack of value, but because they are frauds pulling the bait and switch).

If you ever find yourself feeling like you suddenly need to work harder to keep someone’s attention that was recently abundant, that is your signal.

keithmorrisonsvoice · 2020-07-17T11:35:21+00:00

These items fall nicely within narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) as well. I encourage you to do your own research on NPD. The tactics above are abusive.

Title	Red pill red flags
Author	Aurore11
Upvotes	75
Comments	9
Date	July 17, 2020 7:07 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/hsr6gd/red_pill_red_flags/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/red-pill-red-flags.713483 https://theredarchive.com/post/713483

Comments