I've managed to date for the last few years and have done a good job keeping girls at arms length and had success. I took a break for awhile and recently got back in the game and dated a girl that was an absolute blast. Things went quick in the 6 weeks we dated. I started to get feelings and messed it all up by going full blue pill on her and falling into her frame and being over available over text. It took her less than 5 days to completely change her tune and skip town on me. She laid on top of me after sex, looked into my eyes and told me she liked me, then it took less than 2 weeks later and she told me she thought I was a great guy but she needed space. (Turns out shes getting dicked by a new dude less than a month later).

I did really enjoy the feeling of caring about her, etc. It was almost kind of alien and but I liked it. How do you balance keeping them around while at arms length and not caring about them while also getting those warm and fuzzy feelings about them without scaring them away? The thing is, I WANTED to be around this girl in my free time. When compared to a lot of women of the past, I didn't care if I saw them or not and sometimes felt like they were being a burden and I could be doing other things instead. To successfully date do you always have to remaine so unattached? Sure seems like it.