It started out as casual sex because that was what I wanted, but he was not the asshole I was looking forward to (so I won't have feelings). He expressed a lot of interest in hanging out with me outside the bedroom. However there were no concrete plans for a date, so I kept my guard up. This is the first time I'm analyzing deeper actually.

I've let him initiate everything, whether it's texts about my daily life or meetings, and played the girl role. He does good morning messages nearly every day. One day I asked him whether we were just fucking, because hey I'm super confused here, and he said no, we can go out.

Next week he went abroad for work. For the first time he didn't reply my text in about 3 days so I didn't check my app as I was starting to feel insecure. Went out socializing instead and kept busy.

Realized he texted me and I didn't reply for a few days since I didn't have the app. I gave a poor excuse, to which he called me out on. Then I admitted I felt vulnerable and deleted the app.

I'm not very good at showing emotions in person, so I think he was a bit surprised. He says he's sorry and he misses me, but having dated assholes I'm worried it's some fuckboy move to continue having sex with me.

Anyway I'm not sure admitting vulnerability was the right thing to do. I feel like a marshmallow now.

I want him to ask me out on a date when he gets back, but at the same time since this started out with casual sex, reading TRP makes me think it won't work out, and my previous experiences makes me think everything men say is just for sex.

How to fix?