My best friend was on a date with her does-not-know-how-to-spell-value Ex a few weeks ago.

Yes, I know, I was so close to getting her admitted for the rest of her life, but she is an adult, so here we fucking go.

They went to get ice cream at a McDonald’s DriveThrough. He asked what she wanted and ordered for her and himself. So far so bad. My friend likes her McFlurry with a topic that costs extra here in Germany. Around 50 Cents added, I think.

When the lady at the counter tells them the price, he says, and I kid you not:

„Well, this will be 2,90 for me and 3,40 for you.“

HE PROCEEDS TO PUT 2,90 ON THE COUNTER AND SITS THERE LOOKING AT HER SMILING WHILE SHE SCRAMBLES FOR MONEY.

She asks him what that was about and he plainly says: „Yours was more than mine and I did not want to pay for an extra topic that isn‘t good anyway.“

Yeah, he did not pay because she chose a topic for HER ice cream that HE did not like. That man is a narcisstic waste of oxygen.

He then proceeds to eat his food like a mentally challenged alpaca.

Mind you, he wants to get her back aT aLl cOsTs and regularly tells her that she is tHe oNe.

Please, somebody shoot me.